[atisketatasket]

If you were a therapist - or are a therapist - what would be the hardest part to deal with for you?

Me, it would be coming up with the right/useful thing to say to a client.

I threw up a couple other options that occurred to me in the poll, but feel free to submit an "other."

For me it would be being patient. I work in healthcare and have always struggled with this, especially with myself.

I'm okay working for an organisation, but I dread working for myself. I hate anything to do with finances/marketing and I have no business head at all. Just making sure I pay the right tax etc will be a pain for me. The whole idea puts me to sleep.

[MobiusPsyche]

The hardest part for me would be being emotionally present for each client, all throughout the day. I'm very sensitive and can tune into others' emotions easily but it is extremely draining. I wouldn't have anything left to take care of me. Which is why I'm not a T, even though I have the training.

[stopdog]

For me, first - I don't want to sit around while people yammer on about their feelings.

Secondly - I would be quite outdone when stupid pointless things worked. Sometimes I try saying the stupid empty **** the woman has tried at me - to my students. And it quite often, mysteriously to me, works - they pack up telling me how much better they feel. I have to stop myself from yelling at them "stop - I just made that **** up- don't fall for it. I didn't mean it. I don't even really know what it means. Come back here and continue feeling bad rather than letting my drivel work."
I don't of course, because if it helps end the emotional angst at me from a student, I am mostly for it = but I am torn. And I am baffled at how it helped them. Like seriously I want to say- "that was the most basic pedestrian made up thing ever and you are saying it helped - are you messing with me? Do you have a brain?" But I have found that students rarely mess with me like that, and they tend to think me asking if they have a brain is an insult - so I refrain. Again, I don't know why but there we have it.

And then I become indignant and pissed off that the woman is just phoning it in = seriously did she really think that crap would help me somehow? She really is just spewing stuff out without any thought and hoping.
So, third, I would feel like a charlatan.

[mostlylurking]

I'm similar to Mobius, I empathize so readily that other people's emotions are contagious for me. Generally if someone else is crying I will find it very hard or impossible not to cry (sometimes even when it's a little kid, it all depends on how they sound and whether they're being adequately cared for by nearby adults). When there's a crisis I can put my emotions aside but it's like they're a ticking time bomb that might blow at an unknown moment. I certainly couldn't make it all day, and even if I could, what a nightmare for the people I'd come home to.

[LonesomeTonight]

I said remaining calm and grounded. I think I'd get too caught up with my clients. I'd be the T answering texts at 3 a.m., who wouldn't feel like I could limit them because my client needs me. I'd feel guilt over those I couldn't help. So...that's why I'm not a T--even though I'm good at reading people and empathizing (my T has commented on this), so in some ways, I'd be a good one. But I feel like it would be at the expense of my own mental health/life...

[awkwardlyyours]

I dunno -- sitting still and not giving in to bodily tics? I can't seem to stop shaking my legs rather violently for the life of me -- I imagine that might potentially distress a client or two.

Current T scratches herself quite openly (armpits, underside of breasts etc) -- I find her lack of adherence to rigid social norms quite charming, I must say.

Former T on the other hand would be very still (almost lifeless) and then suddenly erupt into some wild gesticulation and then equally suddenly stop it. And, then very precisely, with very rigid robot-like movements, pick up her gas-station coffee cup, hold it in a precisely precarious fashion and wait for the precise moment (when I wasn't watching and yet, it wouldn't be impolite for her to drink the awful liquid because I didn't seem terribly distressed) to drink it in equally precise movements. It was......disturbingly fascinating.

[kecanoe]

Other. For me it would be setting and kindly holding boundaries. I think I would want to be very available yet would know that I can't do that for 30 or so clients or however many a t sees. I think I would have to be like T2 and T3 and have no outside contact other than returning calls during normal hours and I think there would be some people that I would think need more than that. Because of my conflict over that, I would likely be abrupt.

[Victoria'smom]

Other- knowing when to trust a client and when a client needs IP.

[BayBrony]

Self care/boundaries.
My boundaries as a veterinarian are abysmal and clients text/call/email me all hours of the day and night with questions etc.
My T is so strong yet so kind and yielding. She knows exactly what she can give and that is all.
I just give til I pass out from exhaustion.

[Nammu]

Listening to the patient who goes on and on about the same issue and feeling sorry for themselves but never really working on the issues.....id probably tell them to get a pet, leave and come back when they were serious about healing and truly moving on in their life. A pet would help them more than any therapy at that point.

[TrailRunner14]

Trying to "fix" their problems or walk them through their issues. I always want to fix a problem for someone and make them feel better. I really don't think I could be a therapist because I would stress myself out or run my clients away by being too (what's the word?) maternal. ??

It would not be a good fit for me.

[CantExplain]

Humility.

I'd want to be clever and I'd enjoy being looked up to. (Patients who didn't look up to me would be terminated.)

[ScarletPimpernel]

The hardest part for me would be boundaries. I'd probably be too empathetic and too emotional to remain a strong, stable person for a client.

Also being patient. I don't do well with drama, manipulation, anger, rudeness, attention-seeking, etc.

I can't be a T. I have great difficulty extending unconditional positive regard to people who malinger (different from factitious disorders and psychosomatic disorders), and people who feel their mistreatment of others is their entitlement.

Holding back from immersing myself in their problems.

For me most likely a practical element: working with exact appointments all day every day. Always having to be present for each client when I am required to, in ways they want me. I've worked highly flexible and autonomous times in my whole career and like it this way (I think by default, why I choose to work this way), so this aspect would be hard to get used to. Also, I would probably struggle if I had too many clients, probably would not see more than 2-3 per day, I am too much an introvert for more. But I actually think that working as a therapist part time might be interesting for me.

Impossible to answer. One would be only projecting their own woundedness into a fantasy scenario.

[atisketatasket]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

Impossible to answer. One would be only projecting their own woundedness into a fantasy scenario.

No; I think those who answer are demonstrating self-knowledge.

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

No; I think those who answer are demonstrating self-knowledge.

At what point in their journey to be a therapist is This 'self knowledge' coming from?
I mean if your were a therapist, hopefully these wounds wouldn't exist? It's a fantasy question. Where are the answers coming from?

[stopdog]

I don't believe that therapists are not wounded or that therapists are healed- more that one hopes they can overcome their wounds or set them aside while with clients. And from the reports - many cannot.
(I don't actually see any of it in terms of wounded or healed -but just to use the terminology frequently employed)

I don't think that all reasons for why we would find certain aspects of a career challenging are related to woundedness. The same question can be asked regarding any type of work and I am sure there are elements of every career that is more challenging for an individual than other elements of it. A lot of this, imo, is related to individual interest (or lack thereof) and preferences coming from our personalities that do not represent weakness or wounds, just interests, personal values and lifestyle choices. I also don't think it is a fantasy question any more than when we contemplate a career choice or change in general. Don't we all do that at some point of our lives?

[itisnt]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

At what point in their journey to be a therapist is This 'self knowledge' coming from?
I mean if your were a therapist, hopefully these wounds wouldn't exist? It's a fantasy question. Where are the answers coming from?

Sorry to disagree but I don't think any well-trained, self-actualized T would actually describe him/herself as without "wounds". The whole nature of being human is to deal with issues and hurts that effect us and impact us on a very personal level. Woundedness is not something that just clients experience. Yes, hopefully, a T would know what his/her wounds are and be able to recognize when those personal things were impacting the clients therapy . . . . although after reading what's on this forum and other "therapy" forums, I'm not so sure there are many of those Ts out there!

Therapy in my opinion isn't about wounds being all healed up and gone, never to be heard from again. It's more about becoming aware of your wounds, recognizing when they are impinging on your life and learning ways to lessen their impact.

[itisnt]

I didn't vote in the poll because I can't ever even pretend that I'd ever be a therapist! Definitely not my kind of job.
But I love reading the other responses.