[Loco4]

My T was running 15 minutes late the other day. She didn't apologise to me or even acknowledge that she was late or I'd been waiting.

I wasn't upset she was late, she gives me extra time when I need it. I guess someone that day needed the time, and she did give me a full hour.

Maybe it's a bit petty, but I kind of expected her to acknowledge it.

[itjustis]

I think it's basic manners to apologise, not just in therapy but in general everyday life.
My T was late the first two sessions back and she apologised and explained on both occasions.

[Loco4]

Originally Posted by itjustis

I think it's basic manners to apologise, not just in therapy but in general everyday life.
My T was late the first two sessions back and she apologised and explained on both occasions.

Exactly! It would have been polite. I don't know why this bothers me so much...

[itjustis]

Originally Posted by Loco4

Exactly! It would have been polite. I don't know why this bothers me so much...

Maybe it bothers you because you would have apologised if you were in T's position?
Maybe you could tell her how it made you feel?

[Waterbear]

It would bother me too, common courtesy is to apologise if you are late.

Mine apologises for everything. Sometimes it embarrassess me she's so considerate.

My T was annoyed with himself the other week when he arrived 30 seconds after me. I am in no doubt he would apologise if he were so late. In fact I doubt he would ever be late by more than a minute or so.

[Sarmas]

Mine would apologize at times. One of the times she ran super late and then tried blaming me for starting late. I was so upset. She then got very defensive and told me that I wasn't myself. That was the first time that I spoke up for myself. She always have herself reasons as to why she's running late but so many were not legit especially when I can hear her on the phone walking her husband through canceling an Amazon order for a toy that she bought for her son. That was just one of the many times. It was tiresome and I thought very unprofessional. She then got off the phone to explain how she needed to cancel this Amazon order because they found the you at Walmart. She says that she gives back the time but she really doesn't. If we start 20 -25 min into the hour and she explains herself for another 5-10 min then finishing at the hour or 5 minutes past the hour that's an issue. I was thinking if that was something that she would wait for my appointment to do. I don't think others would accept that and because I said nothing up until that point she then continued. I didn't know that I needed to voice myself in order for her to consider it an issue. I would sit there for kids appointment and see her clients come and go and she didn't start 15-20 min into the hour. I think she picks and chooses. She works only two days out of the week and fills up her schedule. Perhaps she leaves no time for her to regroup and so she needs to find time somewhere in the day to address her life issues. I think when you overbook yourself Ts just start running into issues and the quality of care lessens. Just my opinion.

[t0rtureds0ul]

I think it depends on the situation, but by the sounds of it I think you were quite entitled to an explanation and apology. I'm not always great apologies myself though. Like, this morning I was really late for an important meeting. I was super nervous, had done loads of prep work, showered etc, and sat down to try and plan as much as I could how to deal with my nerves in the meeting. I got totally caught up in my own head and didn't realise how long I'd been thinking and next thing I know I'm an hour late. I barely apologised because I was so embarrassed and didn't know how to explain my lateness. It wasn't me being impolite- more socially inept. I guess T's probably shouldn't have that as an excuse though.

[Yours_Truly]

Yes, it's just common courtesy.

Absolutely. None of my therapists have ever started me that much late but I agree with everyone else, it is basic good manner to apologize for it in any situation. I would also think that consciously giving the previous patient 15 more minutes while knowing that someone else is waiting is disrespectful, even if the time is made up afterwards. Why would they assume that I have time to run late?

[velcro003]

Yes, I think that is basic courtesy in the first place, but by professional standards, T's should definitely apologize if running late! My T has been late a few times, and she has always apologized (and given me the extra time at the end).

[Loco4]

I'm finding a little hurtful that she didn't say anything, like I don't deserve basic courtesy!

[BrazenApogee]

I would definitely bring this up.

My former bad T was late all the time. My current T is always on time, very punctually. There was once he was a minute late opening the door and I was very angry, he showed me his clock that said he was on time.

[Unrigged64072835]

It should be a matter of common courtesy to apologize for being late. You're paying for time you're not getting.

[velcro003]

Something interesting that came out of my T sometimes running late. I guess it happened twice in a row with a new client, and her client fired her. Her supervisor gave her h*ll for it, and now is sticking more rigidly to a schedule. She said that her supervisor said that people may not say anything to her about being late, but they do mind.

I told my T that the first few times it happened, it freaked me out a little. But, because it was a weekend and I had nothing else to do, I learned to accept it and be fine with it (and i was), but I definitely would never have told her that unless she had brought it up.

[ScarletPimpernel]

My T apologizes, but she's almost never late. Last week she was 1 min late. Jokingly, I told her she was late. She told me I'd get over it

[SvanThor]

Not if it's a family emergency or something that was out of their control, no.

[stopdog]

I think a therapist should. I don't think it hinges on what the crisis was.

I would say it is courtesy to apologize, but it isn't really an issue for me if my T runs a bit late occasionally. I tend to not get bothered much by that kind of thing.

[junkDNA]

yes, i think so