Couch 125 - We shall survive!

I once emailed No. 3 to ask if we could speak by phone. She didn't have my number at home with her, so she asked me to text it to her cell - which she had not given me.

It's the kind of thing people just forget. It's not personal.

Granite, you are too sick to be doing these kinds of mental acrobatics!! Dont make me come there and hug you!

Just as long as she knows youre okay after the surgery. And now you have her cell if something should happen and you go back into the hospital unplanned.

I know its very very very weird talking to them when youre sick. But it really is all about being human and trusting another person.

Like when i was leaving the hospital, and my t asked me if i wanted a ride. I was thinking like, how long will it take for him to get here?? Id rather call a taxi! But it was really nice of him to offer. Like at least i had a choice. So you have a choice too. Shes a good choice. A better choice than we used to have, which was between nothing or garbage.

We love you, granite!! Everybody is pulling for you!

my husband answered and she called him bye another name .i took the phone from him and answere and told her who i was and that was my husband who answered . she sounded put off and said that she was trying to return a call on her caller ID and that i must have been the last person who called . that she had called this number by mistake . i told her it was fine and she said that she was glad i was doing well and that she would see me next week . i know im not seeing her next week but on the 8 th next thursday is to soon . i corrected her and she said we will see what she has written in her book and to have a good day and she is glad im doing well . i said thank you and let her go . it just seems like i really dont exist for her at all other then my apt time . it wouldnt matter so much but it doesnt seem to be the case for so many other clients . why am i such a horrible person .

i know that the medication and pain and tiredness makes all this seem so much worse then it is . i know im weepy all the time over nothing . driving my hubby crazy

Anyone who had major mega-surgery just last week gets to be as weepy as they want.

Granite's a porous rock. It's allowed to be weepy.

It coulda been the liquor store she hoped was calling her back. That would explain some things. Seriously, she could be ordering food and stuff in for guests.

Eta obviously the oat bran was not enough for bkfast today.

I been eatin diet jello w sliced banana. I bought some boxes years ago - im afraid to look at the expiration date! - and i FINALLY got my carp together enough to make it!

Yeah, you have gone through some major physical trauma in the past week! Try and give yourself a break here. I think all it was is that your T accidentally called you, but was glad to hear you are well. I highly doubt she was "put off." Maybe she was confused, so it sounded that way.

Rest and relax and try very hard not to let this spin out of control. You DO mean a lot to your T. Please try and remember that. If i have to go search for old posts where you were convinced she hated you/didn't care about you, and then when you were so brave to bring it up...you realized that maybe it wasn't true...I will! I will do it! <3

Feeling weepy after heart surgery is very common. I don't know why that is, but I have seen it a lot. Please cut yourself some slack.

(((granite)))

Well that was a ridiculously stupid waste of a session I think I should just make another post about it instead of spamming the couch about it. Going to do that now.

I want to be supportive. What should I say next time?

Vampires are a bunch of snooty elitists.

Cause it's all about blood for them?

Art I read your other thread and I'm so sorry it worked out like that today. I am about to see Kashi today and I am worried I am going to feel shut down. He called me before thanksgiving for support. I felt grateful for the call but a little shut down. Maybe because he couldn't do anything to help at the moment except the call. Maybe because part of me wanted a pity cute to his thanksgiving. Maybe because he focused too much on dbt skills and forgot the person in the process. Anyways I hate the feeling of being shut down. I don't wish it on anyone.

Arrgghh just tried to log in as cheese muncher which is the nickname of our youngest daughter. Now I have forgotten what I wanted to say

Hey CE

Hope squirrel is ok and not putting too much pressure on herself.
And all past users if you are lurking

Eta - i realized that might be triggering. But somebody DID say i talk too much! moi??!

Um. Whom?

CE, I don't think I have any right to request any kind of particular treatment and if what you or anybody else writes upsets me it's my problem and nobody else's. I simply wanted to respond to your statement, because you had misunderstood what I wrote due to me being unclear. I appreciate that you want to be supportive.

I only tease you to show how much I love you.

I feel abysmal about my session earlier. I just don't know what happened. It just went to hell almost immediately and it's like we were both helpless to stop it. I feel like I did something wrong but I don't know what I did and I don't know how to fix it.

I wish I knew what you could do, Art, except keep showing up until you figure out what was going on and trust that your therapist will do the same.

I think you talk just the right amount.

And you know i was just looking for an excuse to hold you

Boy we get mushy on these long weekends! Either its all the sugar, or being deprived of sugar!

FINALLY doing laundry. My pillowcases look like your grampa's grampa has been sleeping in my bed

But im only halfway thru remaking the bed. Freakin duvets! Whos the idiot who invented this concept? Its like a bed triathlon.

Another snap poll: what would you guys think if at the end of a session the therapist handed you a tablet and asked you to rate the session? In four categories, like, "I felt heard" etc. And then you pass it back and she looks at it and discusses it?

Thank you. "Keep showing up" is the one thing I know I can do. I just hope that she can and will...

I think i understand why your marriages maybe didnt work out... :Onascaleof1to10:

But who am i to talk ? I used to carry a yardstick in the back of my little truck, and a date once told me that was very intimidating!