Facebook

So today I noticed that my potential new T has facebook profile through a mutual friend, I requested her. This is the new therapist I have been meaning to meet with, but have not yet. What do you guys think, is it ethical to accept a friend request from a potential client? (Not her client yet, and don't know exactly if I will be, so it is a very grey area and she is only slightly older than me)

Does she know you are a potential client? In my view would be unethical for a therapist to be friends with a client on Facebook as it blurs the boundaries and jeopardises the therapeutic safety of the relationship.

Lol well I don't have a common last name, so when she sees it she might since we have emailed recently. Like I said, I truly don't know for sure whether she will be a T to me, so its not black and white really. But damn is she hot and she is also bisexual, like me. Might I add, the other girl (our mutual friend on facebook) is around my age as well.

what are your motivations and goals here?? what are you seeking through this

So if you start seeing this therapist, will you be okay if she blocks you since you are a client? Why are you deceptively working your way into this therapist's personal life when you realize she may be unaware of who you are? Why question the therapist's "ethics" when she isn't functioning as your therapist at this point, so ethics aren't part of the equation? Your sexual comments about her already point to real problems here.

Lolagrace, here's the thing I'm not keeping who I am a secret. My real name is on my facebook, so she can decide whether she adds me or not. And yes, if she absolutely had to unfriend me, then yes. If I see her I only plan to see her for short term and it's not my fault she's attractive.

it sounds to me like you are looking for a friend/romantic partner rather than a therapist

I don't have facebook so excuse me if I'm way off here, but why would she accept your friend request if she doesn't know who you are? I think that's weirder than friending a client..

I think it's kind of creepy to friend-request someone you don't even know. And she'd be dumb to accept a request from some internet rando. Ethically it's probably a grey area, but seems like there's a high potential for problems when Ts let clients into their personal lives so most avoid it.

She didn't know the other mutual friend girl either in real life...she has a sex talk show too, so random people do know her. And I never said she wouldn't recognize me

I don't know if it's unethical, but it doesn't sound like a great idea on your end of things if she's someone you're attracted to.

I am curious...why do you want her as a therapist? (Besides the hotness.)

I don't think accepting a facebook friend request in of itself is unethical (can you really file an ethical complaint against a therapist for accepting a friend request from someone on facebook?)

Unless it's her business account for a public program you mentioned, her accepting your request might reveal a bit of carelessness or looseness about boundaries or self-discipline.

I think that if it is her "business" page it is fine to join if you want. If you want her as a t, then I would not friend her on FB. I think many ts would refuse to see a client that was a FB friend first (again, unless it is on their business FB)

Without even getting into ethical behavior of the therapist it seems unethical of you to friend request her.
Yeah, yeah, I know - ethics don't apply to the consumer here.
But friend requesting a potential T because you think she is 'hot' is just not the right way to approach therapy. It seems to me that it would be dooming any potential therapeutic relationship from the start.
By all means, send her a friend request on facebook.
But then - if she accepts it - find yourself a different person to be your therapist.

I would probably recommend that you don't see a therapist you're attracted to. It is just going to complicate things and let's face it, therapy is complicated enough! As far as the FB thing goes, don't be surprised if she doesn't accept it. To be honest it would be in everyone's best interest if she doesn't.

mine sent me a friend request. i dont think its a big deal.

She did end up accepting me.

She did accept me as a friend.

She did accept my request.

Did she accept your request in full knowledge of your attraction to her and that you were a potential client?

And I'm still curious as to why you want to see her besides her hotness.

You can't really be friends with your therapist, beyond the therapeutic relationship. So as someone else says, whether it is a problem depends on whether the Facebook page is a professional page or not.

My name wasn't secret but I'm not sure she knew it was me? Since we haven't met in person yet.

I accept friends with similar political and other interests regardless of whether I know them personally. I use Facebook to exchange relevant articles and participate in discussions about them so it not that clear - especially if they have friends in common it could just be like extending ones network.

My therapist made it very clear in her practice policies that she does not interact with clients on any social media platform. I think it's for the best, a good way to set that boundary. Plus, I think I'd start to feel self conscious about what she would think about my tweets or Facebook posts!