Breaking promise to T

Newbie question: on this forum, do 'SH' and 'SI' mean the same thing? (I know that 'SI' can also mean 'suicidal ideation;' is 'SH' just more specific for self harm?)

Uhm, good question. I guess it's the same (at least I use it as a synonyme)

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Oh god, no, it was not you at all! It's my problems I described on couch

And I use SI and SH as a synonyme too

I didn't know either. I'm glad you asked.

Accountability can be good if someone already has strong determination and coping skills but I don't think it's very helpful to make promises to someone else about a behavior that is out of control. IMO, it just generates guilt and shame. Probably more helpful to try to address what to do when those urges hit and the root causes.

I never SH-ed but I think substance addiction (that I had) is similar in some ways. Some people who use 12-step programs for that work with a guide called "sponsor", a fellow addict in recovery who can be contacted when things get hard and can serve as a vantage point of accountability (peer support). I did not use that program but used others and also therapy in recovery. It did work well to go to a T every week with the idea that I am building my resources, when I was indeed determined. But when I was in a nasty relapse, no amount of wanting to get back on track and report success to the T worked. I would hide it and lie all the time, not just to the T but to everyone. It only started working well again once I'd pulled it together and started using a more complex set of tools outside of therapy, everyday. Then it actually became a pleasure and very rewarding to go to session and report steady progress. But I had to have a firm deal with myself first and use my coping strategies - T (or anyone else) could never do it for me. He helped with some of my general obsessiveness and self destructive tendencies though.

I was going to say I didn't think there was a point in making a promise to your T, but what you're saying makes a lot of sense. I never really thought about it that way, so thank you for saying this.

I should probably start making promises to my T, just to keep me in check. I tend to be non compliant with meds, and I hide things from my Mental Health professionals. It's something I've struggled with ever since seeking help.

I honestly don't think I've ever promised a T anything. I've come up with a game plan for certain things, but never made any promises. If I did, I guess I would talk about it with her. Often the things I want to avoid discussing are exactly what I need to bring up.