[Christina86]

Stupid school. Until administrative stuff gets worked out (long story) I can't see my T.

Can't book an appointment, can't talk to him...

and I think I'm going insane. I mean it's only been a week now, but I WANT MY T.

I feel lost. Hate the word so much, but I feel abandoned.

It hurts so much and I can't even say to myself "he's only gone for __ days" ... because I don't know when he'll be back. Could be tomorrow, could be another week - heck it could be more than that.

I feel pathetic. When he's back I might only get to see him every 2-3 weeks because of other students... and that hurts too.

I just hurt. It's like he's never ever coming back. Like I pushed him away and he's left. But this time it wasn't my fault... unless he never wants to see me again.

I feel dependent. Why do I latch onto peope. Shouldn't get close to T. Shouldn't trust him.

Maybe I should just quit therapy now and never go back - even when he is back.

I'm gonna go cry now.

(((((canders))))

I pray for you he'll be back sooner then you think.

[Mouse_]

((Canders))

[Christina86]

Thanks (((((((((((((Dustin)))))))))))))) and ((((((((((Mouse))))))))))))).

One of my friends is trying to convince me to not quit therapy, he says it would do me more harm than good.

But this hurts me so much, because if things get really bad (just a bit worse than right now) ... he's not going to be there to help.

He's gone... what if he never wants me to come back?

[jacq10]

Maybe you don't know all the answers, but the important thing is that he WILL be back. Just keep that thought with you when you are struggling. And don't worry about feeling dependant ... you need a constant in your life that you know you can share your feelings with. You share so much personal thoughts and fears with him, its only natural that you feel "attached" because he may be the only person you feel comfortable sharing those thing with right now ... and thats okay. Dependance is something that naturally (for a lot of people) comes with therapy. It did with me, and I can assure you there are others out there who feel the same way.
Try not to focus on how OFTEN you get to see him, but just that you DO get to see him. Right now you're used to seeing him more frequently, but just give the semester a little more time, and 2 weeks isn't going to seem as bad.
hang in there, and try not to doubt yourself so much (I know Waaaaay easier said than done, but i have faith in you )

Jacq

[January]

((((((((((((( Christina ))))))))))))

Hugs,

Jan

((((((canders))))))