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#1
Sep 07, 2007, 03:16 PM
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i just called my ex therapist who dumped me after just 3 sessions, which to his benefit i must say he said he didnt think he was skilled enough in certain areas to get me the help i needed and gave me a specialists name and number. But i havent called him, yes you can give me a slap on the wrist, so i didnt know what to do. There are no other male therapists in the area and im at a loss. For some reason the whole idea of seeing a woman therapist scares the crap outta me, in fact it is impossible for me to see a woman therapist...i know i would never get anywhere....and i dont know what to do..so i called him. I dont know what to expect, and im sooo nervous. i just gave him a voice mail because he hasnt been answering his phone, which i guess is kinda good, because if he calls me back than i know it will be ok that i called him and he is opening the communication again and if he doesnt call back then i know i should just take him off my phone address book, lol its been like how many months and i still have him on list...im still worried....maybe i could just ask if he could do hypnotherapy on me so i can get back some memories of the past, or i could ask him what he thought i had, since he never did tell me but i think he thought it would crowd my thought process until he really really understood you know? if that makes sense. thanks for listening to me
did i do the right thing??
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"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#2
Sep 07, 2007, 03:59 PM
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Yes you did the right thing!!! I don't see how it could hurt to have done that so I think it's good.
I'm with you on the gender-preference with therapists -- it's important. I'm also only able to see a male therapist (I know I could never get anywhere with a female -- I suspect it just has to do with how I related to my mom). I hope you can find a male therapist! And good for you on making the phone call! Sidony |
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#3
Sep 07, 2007, 07:14 PM
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thank you...i think i needed justification ...ive been wanting to call him and end up not talking and just hanging up..lol he must think he has a stalker but my poor heart didnt know what to say and do so i kinda just didnt all together...
thank you again...i needed to hear that it was ok....
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"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#4
Sep 07, 2007, 07:22 PM
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Yes, of course, if you needed to call it's more than ok!!
Is the specialist he referred you to a female? I have had two therapists in my life. One, a woman, I worked with for 3 1/2 years or so. I had a great deal of respect for her and she was very supportive. Now, I am with a male therapist and it has been an intense relationship. I think this time around I am getting much more out of my therapy than I did with the female, but I'm not sure if I just wasn't ready at that time or if it was a gender issue. In any case, maybe he can help you in some way, if not to see you, then at least to find a therapist you are comfortable with. Take care. 
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 [/url] |
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#5
Sep 09, 2007, 04:18 PM
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the specialist is a guy...but i dont remember if he gave me a name or number or both.....in therapy i dissociate a ton ...and probably was unable to get the information solidly when he told me...
and he hasnt called me back yet 
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#6
Sep 09, 2007, 05:10 PM
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It's always good to listen to yourself and take a risk. See what happens.
What sort of specialist did he recommend?
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My new blog http://www.thetherapybuzz.com "I am not obsessing, I am growing and healing can't you tell?" |
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#7
Sep 10, 2007, 02:48 AM
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a self injury specialist...said he knows this guy who travels around alot and deals with extreme self injury....i guess....said he could get the guy to fit me in....but thats all i really remember....im kinda giving myself the ok cause it is only sunday and he has two offices on in an office like an hour away and one here so he might just be at his other office....i guess...
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#8
Sep 11, 2007, 03:00 AM
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maybe i shouldnt have called no response
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#9
Sep 11, 2007, 03:42 AM
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I'm sorry he hasn't called yet, but he could be away on leave or very busy or any number of reasons. It doesn't mean he doesn't care. Did you tell him what you wanted when you left a message??
I've found that some Ts and Drs are hopeless at returning calls, not becuase they don't care but because they are disorganised, busy etc. I've found the best approach is to make an appointment and see them, and they are always happy to see you, even if they can't do anything specifically to help, and they have a dedicated appointment to sort out your problems instead of trying to did it in between the million other things they have to do. You said you connected with him, maybe make an appointment to see him and get your T to call this other guy he referred you to - it would be easier for you if this new person had some background and if he is really good and booked up, it might be easier to get an appointment with him if your T calls. My T makes all my Drs appointments etc for me because she knows I wouldn't do it. I feel like an idiot sometimes but that's how it is. Good Luck |
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#10
Sep 11, 2007, 03:42 PM
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but see he isnt my therapist anymore so i cant make an appointment or anything...i left a message saying i really have a few important questions that need answering and if he could call me back than that would be great ...i dont know...if it will work or not...or what will happen
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"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#11
Sep 11, 2007, 06:51 PM
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InACorner, I hope he calls back soon.
Are the important questions you have to ask him the name and phone number of the specialist he recommended to you? Maybe if he knew that's all you needed, he would respond more quickly. Maybe he thinks it is a therapy call and he is no longer your therapist, etc. Who knows. I remember one time I called a former counselor of mine, who had always been reliable, and left a phone message asking her to call me back because I was looking for a referral for a counselor for my teenage daughter (she had mentioned to me before she knew such practitioners). Well, she never ever called back. I have no idea why. I thought it was kind of rude. Maybe once therapists are done with a client, they will tolerate no contact whatsoever.  I hope your story ends differently than mine--you have a much greater need than I did and deserve a callback right away. Hang in there.
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"Therapists are experts at developing therapeutic relationships." |
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#12
Sep 12, 2007, 02:50 AM
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actually he called me back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yey....
im so excited unfortunatly he called me while i was at work....so i have to call him again... thats ok at least he called me back thats all that matters.
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"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#13
Sep 12, 2007, 01:05 PM
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Great news. Yay!
__________________
"Therapists are experts at developing therapeutic relationships." |
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#14
Sep 12, 2007, 01:50 PM
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Huray!! I am glad he called.
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#15
Sep 12, 2007, 02:41 PM
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it looks like we will be playing phone tag...we always seem to do that...its aqward...
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#16
Sep 12, 2007, 05:22 PM
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I had to play phone tag for a while, it's not fun. I hope you guys can get a hold of one another soon.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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