Bizarre EMDR consult

This morning I met with a T who uses EMDR. She did most of the talking. She went into detail about why she was a non traditional student, why she has two master degrees, what incident from her childhood she worked on when she had to be a client in college, that she loves what she does but how poorly they are paid and politics, some of the cute shops in town and her two favorite restaurants, how she grew up on a household where she was not allowed to cry. The different states she has lived in and the jobs she had She multiple examples of different reasons people have come to her for EMDR. The first thing she talked about was people who had long term CSA. That means uncomfortable as that is why I am there She had to have seen my discomfort. However she never asked me what my trams was about 2 minutes left to our appointment. And she asked that I tell her in about one sentence.

All she asked was about my marriage, ages of my kids, that the go to college out of state, I mentioned where I work. asked if I ever thought about becoming a psych nurse. I said most and so she asked about my dream job
I mention my lack of trust and having a very hard time showing emotions. And she told me the basics of how EMDR works.

During all her talking I kept checking the clock. I though for sure the initial consultation must have been more than an hour. Since she wasn't asking much about me. I went into the appointment reminding myself I couldn't compare her to my regular T. T does talk briefly about herself when appropriate but just seemed like today was more about her than me.

That doesn't sound so great.

Are there other options?

It doesn't sound great no , EMDR T's need to be attuned to their clients particularly. Can you try another ?

Good grief. I at least hope the "consultation" was free. Sounds like you should have been charging her!

Hope there are other options for you to look into. My old t self-disclosed excessively and irrelevantly like this, and she also never asked much about me. She was looking for someone to fill her needs from day so my therapy suffered. Just saying, beware!

Holy crap!

Woah.

Woah. I'd never go back.

I currently have another appointment in two weeks with her. When she asked when she asked when I come back I didn't know how to answer. She mentioned returning next week and just jumping into the emdr. I want sure if it was just me and her way of doing things was normal. The more I think about it the more I know I need to trust my instincts. I so badly want to reach out to my long term T. I can reach out anytime. The idea of telling her about this other T seems so uncomfortable...she doesn't know this new person bur thought she seemed nice and all from their limited contact over the years. Not sure what I will do next

I pay a $20 copay..which she never mentioned so zip asked her. She told me I could pay now or after my insurance is billed. I told her zip would pay it today. That easy if I don't go back I won't have a bill

" Just jumping into EMDR ?!! " This is horrifying - there is preparation before any processing is attempted. I would not recommend returning to this T - alarm bells are going off. Speak to long term T about this if you can , it's your wellbeing that's important. I'm sorry this has happened as EMDR can be very effective with a good T.

I agree with all of the other posters. I would not go back to this woman. Excessive self disclosure and a clear lack of interest in you on your first session were warnings enough but what really worries me was the 'jumping into EMDR'. Wow, just wow . I don't know much about this technique but I know enough to know that there has to be a trusting relationship before starting to do this. This woman sounds crazy, I hope you decide to do what is best for you right now but if she isn't interested in you on the first session, she will be even less interested on the second and third. Did she even ask about your trauma and check if it is safe to start emdr with you?

No, emdr isn't something you can just "jump into". I'd run and never look back.

With about 2 minutes left she asked what my trauma was in a about one sentence. I told her not in one sentance. So I did in about 3. She then said that is all I will ever have to tell here. she said she learned Emdr when it was new and the founder was still doing research. She stated that there have been changes to how it is done but she never found the changes to be necessary because it works so well.

She sounds like shes a legend in her own mind, as the saying goes. Nothing goes in. Nothing. Yet she seems very needy, making you sit thru the story of her. I am not a fan of emdr, but her refusal to learn new techniques seems off to me.

It definitely wasn't encouraging to me. So much for continuing education.

So she asked you to sum up your trauma experience in one sentence two minutes before the consultation ended and now she wants you to jump right into EMDR next week? Hellz to the no! Please do trust your instincts. Seems this woman has the potential to do a lot of harm to you.

Today I am really angry with this person. I really struggled over the past week about going. The idea of telling somebody about my trauma really was difficult. I wanted to cancel but decided I needed to do this. She never asked about my diagnosis, how being triggered effects me, etc . To wait until the very last minute to ask about my trauma. Then to just end the session there without asking how I was doing. The one good thing was that my best friend insisted on going with me as she knew how difficult it was. I thought she would drop me off and go shopping
She wanted to sit in the waiting room. So T knee she was there. This asked her the person was I told her that friend was there as she knew how difficult the appointment was.

One of my issues is that I never feel important or good enough...and this T reinforced that. I want to reach out to long term T but don't know what to say. I feel like I would be "tattling" on other T and complain about another person in the profession.

Oh and he cell phone vibrated multiple times because she received texts. After the second or third time she picked it up, looked at and said she didn't know own if she could turn it off...and so she didn'. It only went off a couple of times after that

Hope you might find this helpful. ( I thought a T I saw needed to see it as well ). EMDR is not the same animal it was 25 years ago , my EMDR T constantly works on how things change and new theories and research. I really hope you don't return to this T.

This T sounds awful!! My T does EMDR and I agree you never just "jump into it" I would never go back and I would also tell your long term T about your session so she doesn't recommend her to others.

Red flags ALL over the place here. I've been to therapists like that who talk about themselves the whole session. Don't go back to her. EMDR is SO tricky and takes great skill and empathic attunement. She ain't got it. BUH bye.

Were you seeing this EMDR person in addition to your longterm therapist or instead of?

I was going to see her in addition to my long term T. I plan to talk to long term T on Monday about what transpired. I am pretty sure I will not return to this new person. But I want T's perspective.

I've done EMDR and it can be EXTREMELY helpful. She's not the right person for it. I hope you find someone else terrific and find it healing. Glad you have a solid T you can discuss this with. This EMDR lady is a mess.