What would you change about your therapist?

[QUOTE=satsuma;5612366]I was wondering the same 😊 maybe wearing sandals although that seems unusual too

I wish my T was less concerned with rules and doing things by the book. She's a little too hung up on formalities, as is often the case with younger Ts.

I wish he would talk more too. I hate silence and hate myself for not talking.
On the other hand, if he starts talking, he never stops

He would be my Dad. No I'm kidding. I guess I wish he was more okay about me Googling him, so I felt more comfortable about talking about that with him.

[QUOTE=satsuma;5612366]Yup his practice is in his house and so we take off our shoes at the door.
In the winter he wears socks but not when it's warmer.

I thought about this

If I could change one thing it would be Ts age. i would make her about 10 years older so that she had completed her family.
She is pregnant and goes on maternity leave in a few months. I don't want her to not be pregnant because she wants a family and this is her first. I wish she was all done with that and didn't have to leave.

Also I'd split him in two so that he could be my supervisor too.

There were many things I would have changed in my first therapist. In the second one, and a feature common with the first: I think I would find therapy more satisfying and productive if the challenged me more directly more often. If they called me out on my defenses and BS upfront. I have never met a T who works this way though. I once had a sort of mentor in my recovery from an addiction who had that style, I loved it and found it very helpful for me. He was never harsh, just pointed out things clearly and politely and asked what I thought about it. With my Ts, it was mostly the other way around: I presented the analyses and insights and they provided feedback (if they did, not always). I still found therapy useful but this factor was always missing from it for me.

I would only wish that we could be on the same page more often, but I know that this is unrealistic. Oh, and I wish she would put a capital letter at the beginning of her name!!

T3 sent me out last night dissociating. I wish she wouldn't do that. I also wish she would not spend so much time explaining things. I could be more assertive there, though. So I guess I don't want it to change too badly.

Also, I'd like to have more flexibility around touch. I don't think her boundary is rigid, I think the touch boundary is there for me because of my transference. So I think it might change over time. She is also a new therapist, so she might be more flexible once she figures out more how to handle the eb and flows of touch.

I am glad that touch is allowed now even if it is only a handshake and incidental contact.

I often wish she would push me more when it comes to painful discussions. I tend not to go very deep for fear of emotions and crying. I sometimes wish she would push me because I know part of my issue is that I don't deal with emotions

It's good to see you around again, Yagr. I'm glad things are still good with your T

I would want art T to go back to individual sessions with me. So I could stop this stupid group "experiment"...

"Normal" T: I would like her to be a bit less forceful sometimes. If I'm not feeling well or if I'm struggeling I might find it hard to stay with my thoughts and my feelings. Also, her being so opinionated can sometimes trigger immense feelings of guilt and shame, not agreeing with her (on the inside) is enough to set it off... I know that's part of my history, still... It sucks. At least we're talking about it and I can be open with her about it.

I would make him not my therapist and make him my dad

I don't think I'd want to change anything about either of them but I agree good T's will ask. Regular T said something like this a while back but I thought it was all OK.

I'd make him well enough to reopen his office/practice!

At the moment i would not change anything.

That's a good one!
T and PrevT- can I have two moms just about my age?
Helllsss, yessss I can....

This sounds like something I would need as well. But I think they don't really want push us when it comes to difficult stuff. It's like I want to go deep but once I get closer, fear takes over and I back off. Or I even avoid it before it gets deeper, even though that's what I actually want

The part of me that sees her as mommy doesn't think she should have vacations. Ok feeling really young right now and pouting about vacation notification announced at today's session.

This is great, I love all the responses!

I would like him to have:

- better knowledge of popular music
- more colourful socks

I would like him to not have:

- other clients
- a wife

...sorry, I'm really not very rational today.

I am not sure one could tweak just a few things. I can abide the woman if I use her for what she can handle. When I try to go outside the couple of things I know she does not screw up - things go greatly amiss.

There are many things I would change about the profession including better screening for licensing. It seems that any goofball can get a license - I am amazed at how many goofballs seem to want one. One would think one would need to be at least X sane to be allowed into a program. Both therapists I hire have stated such is not the case - and there are countless examples of it not being the case.