Have you experienced counter transference?

This. I am still trying to deal with everything that's happened recently with my T and I'm wondering how much of what he said he felt for me was real and how much was countertransference. Did we ever have a "real relationship" or was it all in my head?

I dont think it was all in your head. He talked to you in your car, for privacy.

I guess I keep thinking that if it was real, how could he keep hurting me this way? How could he abandon me like this?

zombie thread
but anyways

interesting to come back to this since when it was posted, I was in the throws of major S loss

Countertransference isn't always BAD

it even happens with my current T
he has expressed strong paternal feelings towards me
I find it healing.

Quite a few years ago.... and my male T was telling me how much he would have liked if his son would date someone "exactly like me." How his son, if he lived nearby, would definitely ask me out because he I was "just his son's type." He couldn't ask for a better match for his son....

Then I was talking to his receptionist and I mentioned how much regard he seemed to have for his son -- or was that regard for me? What, the receptionist answered, astonished. How could he say that? Doctor has two daughters, not a son!

Seemed like countertransference to me, unless maybe his daughter had gender re-assigment and T was just reflecting a new reality.

Mine wouldn’t admit it. I’m involved in certain activities that I guess she had a negative outcome to. I go to the gym and she’s against gym and she frowns upon people goingbthere. When I told her that I was becoming a personal trainer she didn’t take it too well. She made a negative comment. I ignored it and didn’t bring it to her attention.

Yes. It was devastating.

Yes. Two therapists have said some of my behaviours frustrate them. They quite eloquently expressed their frustration and desire to shut me up / stop me from repeating the behaviour. Unfortunately for me...I find it really hard to not do those behaviours like anxious intellectualising, saying my core beliefs like "I'm disgusting".

My T once randomly said "if i had feelings for you

I'd have to refer you out" always found it weird to say out of nowhere. I believe he does. He's just scared to admit it