[nottrustin]

For those who disassociate in session have you found ways to help keep you on the present instead if dissosiating?? If you do disassociate, what are some ways you T brings you back to the present? Unfortunately, I have been really struggling with staying present with both T and EMDR T. It has been a struggle bringing me back so we are trying to finds ways to make it easier.

[fille_folle]

I struggle with this, too. At times, nothing has helped. Sometimes, hearing T's voice helps. Also, if I can force myself to look at her shoes (I can't bear to look at her face).

[TrailRunner14]

I also struggle greatly with it.

Being on the floor feels so safe to me.

My counselor was sitting on the floor with me for my sessions and recently he told me that it hurts his back. I’m so sad that it hurt him and I’m also sad that I’m back in the chair.

Anyway.

Sitting in the floor is very grounding to me. I don’t know if that’s an option for you but it really helped me.

There’s something about not being up off the ground. My hands can touch the floor so the room doesn’t shift and I loose my perspective.

I also rub my hands in the floor and feel it there. It’s real.

Breathe. Belly breathe. Take the air into your abdomen and expand it, not your chest. If you breathe in for a count of 4 breathe it out for a count of 8 slowly.

Does that make sense?

It really helps.

I also look around his office, he helps me, and make a verbal acknowledgement of what we see. I’m not alone and I feel safe because he is acknowledging what we see.

That is what helps me.

It’s so personal to find what works for you.

I hope you find something that helps.

[zoiecat]

Sometimes I try to stay angry. When I'm angry I don't dissociate as much. During EMDR sometimes he'll make me keep my eyes open the trick with the EMDR is that you are supposed to have one leg in the past and one leg in the present in order for it to work. If I close my eyes I tend to go all the way back in the past then I dissociate an EMDR stops processing.

I also changed the chair I sit in so that I can't stare out the window staring out the window will put me down the rabbit hole faster than anything.

When I do dissociate he usually starts with making me say things I see feel and hear in the room then he makes me do 5 knee drops where I have to slap my hand slowly on my knees he usually does it with me and then deep breathing in between each set of 5. I absolutely hate doing it but it does bring me back somewhat. When I dissociate really bad he usually gives me a cold Coke can from his refrigerator the coolness usually helps bring me back. Deep breathing also helps.

[kecanoe]

I look around the room and notice things that are in the room. "I see a yellow flower in a green vase in a picture on the wall." "I see three lights in the ceiling" and I keep going until I feel present.

I breathe in for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, out for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4. And notice my breathing.

I feel where my body is touching things-the floor, the chair, the back of the chair, where my legs touch the chair.

I eat strong candy-sour or mint

If available, ice cubes (I often have a glass of ice water) on my forearm.

Tossing a (lightweight, small) object back and forth with T

T puts her foot next to or on top of my foot and I notice that

If doing EMDR, I go to my safe place. T coaches me if I need it.

Depending on the situation, T may ask the part what it wants to say

Only time and continued talking has lessened my need for dissociation. Not that it doesn't Hapoen. But they're was nothing that would have stopped it when the need for it still existed. T might have said "where have you gone"? Sometimes that would be enough sometimes not.

[zoiecat]

Another thing that might work is to have your therapist catch you before you get too deep. My therapist can usually tell what I'm starting to dissociate in hell I stop and say how present are you and if I'm just starting to go down the hole he'll do grounding exercises to bring me back before I get too deep into it doesn't stop it from happening but makes it easier to come back. Then again when we're talking about stressful things I can go all the way quickly too.

[guilloche]

My last therapist was really, really good at finding ways to get me talking about things that were easier subjects. This helps me "come back" and sort of get back in to my body, brain, and normally brain-space. Something that I know well, have an opinion on, and am comfortable talking about. It could be as simple as talking about a project at work, or explaining something that I know well.

New T is a little different. She has been doing a good job keeping me from dissociating, I think, by not pushing on things that I don't want pushed on. When I did start to dissociate, she'd talk me through what to do. Deep breaths, and naming (out loud) things in the room. I don't really like this as much as the last T though, as it makes me feel silly/stupid.

I also keep a pillow on my lap, upright, and hug it vigorously when I'm freaking out (and use it as a shield between me and T). Pillows are good!

[clueda]

My T and I are working on the exact same thing at the moment. I try to "catch" it, before I go too far into dissociation and my T helps me by asking me every now and then.

What has helped me so far:
- changing the topic to something less stressful
- keeping a pillow in my lap (I think it relaxes me a little)
- holding one of those spikey massage balls in my hands. I fiddle with it and if I press down hard enough on the spikes it kinda hurts which brings me back to the present. It also keeps me from destroying my nails/cuticles.
- tossing a ball back and forth
- taking some deep breaths
- standing up, moving my body
- taking a sip of water

My T also has some "tiger balm" (menthol) in her office that she has offered to me before. Apparently the strong scent helps some people. I've never tried it before, though...

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

I sometimes dissociate. My T will call me by my name, ask whether I can hear him. I have always responded so far, or he called me by my name again and then I responded. For me, it really helps to hear people who are around me, to know they are there. Especially with my T, I feel I can ground myself more if I know the people I care about still exist.

[Lemoncake]

T notices sometimes and either asks "Where are you S?" or "are you with me?"

I always usually have a small soft bear with me to focus on .

[Catlovers141]

When I felt present enough to look around the room, but therapist would pick a color and ask me to find three things in the room that are that color. It was helpful and it encouraged me to both talk a little and all around the room, rather than stare at a certain spot or two.

[nottrustin]

Thank you for all your input. This is all very new to me. So far we have not been able to predict it is happening. Things will be okay, unxomdortable but okay. Then either something (with regular T) or a thought comes into my head and I am fine. It is very quick. I can hear them talking bit can't respond. Thos last time T opened her desk draw to grab something. It is an old squeaky desk so the noise brought me to the present. So we are looking for ideas. I carry a small piece of franc in my purse that is from a momento of mine. She thinks that might be helpful. She did she would ask if she could hand it to me but I can't respond for a bit.... does touch work for anybody? Wondering if asking her to touch my shoulder or knee would help.

i have DID. when i dissociate in session, t just talks to whoever shows up to talk to her next. she doesnt try to ground us, we just go on to the next person. its our preference. old t used to try to force us to get grounded and it wouldnt work, because the dissociation is too strong. she tried getting us to say five things we saw, felt, and heard, or something like that.

[Amyjay]

Originally Posted by Starry_Night

old t used to try to force us to get grounded and it wouldnt work, because the dissociation is too strong. she tried getting us to say five things we saw, felt, and heard, or something like that.

This made me laugh, sometimes my t does that too. A session not too long ago she noticed we had switched and was asking the front part to do the 5 things thing, and the part that was there answered all her questions in a very irritated manner and was like "So what the heck is that supposed to do? Make me go away??"
In the case of a full switch its a little bit insulting more than anything else!

[TrailRunner14]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

This made me laugh, sometimes my t does that too. A session not too long ago she noticed we had switched and was asking the front part to do the 5 things thing, and the part that was there answered all her questions in a very irritated manner and was like "So what the heck is that supposed to do? Make me go away??"

In the case of a full switch its a little bit insulting more than anything else!

That sounds so real to me.

I’m sitting there looking around his office, seeing things that I know are there but it’s like they aren’t real.

I’m trying because he is coaching me and I’m trying to do what I’m supposed to do that is supposed to help.

In reality I believe another part of me steps in and handles it.

I actually feel better but really I think I step back.

[nottrustin]

When I dissosiate It is like I am in a bubble and it be becomes dark and foggy. It is when we touch on something that is extremely painful so I completely shut down. I can't talk or move until I am brought back to the present. It is horrible.

[kecanoe]

I don't know if this will help, but I have learned to call that a freeze response. I think it is Peter Levine who talks about that; when the flight or fight response gets activated and you can't do either, you freeze. I experience the same thing you are describing when I freeze.

With that response, T3 and I have decided that she will just be quiet and patient so that the response doesn't get more activated. When I am ready, I can say what I am thinking and we try to track back what the trigger was so that we can address it.

She will sometimes put her foot up against mine. Seems like kind of a weird thing to do, but it often helps. She does that because it is a non-threatening way to touch for almost everyone. Could you ask your T to try that?