[IrishAmazon]

Hey everyone,

I'm having some problems that I hope some of the older and wiser heads can help me with. Some slight background information: I'm a college student who suffers from some fairly severe depression and anxiety. My parents have both dealt with bouts of depression and alcoholism themselves, so they are not really in a position to be much help. I also tried to commit suicide about a year ago.

First, I'm trying to find a decent therapist in my area, but don't really have any good resources. I don't have family or friends of a family doctor that I can ask for referrals. I've tried asking the student health services at my college, but they told me to go to the student counseling center, where I've already tried to get help with no real results. Is there another good way to get a short list of people I can contact? I don't want to resort to picking names of my (lengthy) insurance provider's list.

Second, I'm concerned because I've already tried to get help, both before and after my suicide attempt. I've already been to four different people at my school's counseling services (two psychologists, one licensed counselor and one psychiatrist). I really disliked all of them - I found them insincere, annoying and unhelpful. I'm also notably bad at articulating my feelings, which makes me pretty terrible at being in therapy. I don't want to end up with another awful therapy experience, because I'd probably just call the whole thing quits.

So, any advice that anyone can offer would be most appreciated.

[Perna]

Was anyone at all helpful to you during your suicide crisis? Anyone in the hospital? I'd find someone I like/trust (professor, neighbor, someone you've known in the past) and see if they can't lend some sort of support, have some idea of how to go about it under your circumstances/in your area. It's a little worrisome to me that you have disliked 4 people in one year; that seems like more than an "average" number of helpers to go though and not very long to check them out.

I don't know what you are looking for in terms of help; what you would accept and anticipate someone helping you with? I might look for a group therapy/support group in real time and/or some way of meeting "more" people in depression/anxiety "circles" to become more familiar with what's there where you are.

I got a lot of help from a "mentor" figure I met volunteering for a library group! I was terminally shy/anxious (use to say yes to the telemarketers because I was afraid to say no) but she was supportive and I could "try" to do things (go downtown, big City with her to testify (her not me :-) before City officials) and the more I did, the easier/less anxious I got. But I've often found, as you call them, "older and wiser" people when I've volunteered and that has been helpful and led me to therapists and situations where I could better find therapists, etc.

If you aren't sure what you want/what to expect; I often read therapist websites online and imagine what seeing that/a therapist like one I'm reading about would be like. Reading the yellow pages under "psychologist" and "marriage and family counselors" and other such titles is entertaining too and germane to local people; some have websites nowadays so you could check out the therapists in your actual area and see if you like how they present themselves and make your own list from what's available.

[sunrise]

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I found them insincere, annoying and unhelpful. I'm also notably bad at articulating my feelings, which makes me pretty terrible at being in therapy.

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It sounds like you recognize it takes two to tango in therapy. Sounds like you haven't found the right person, but you know you need to make an effort too when you are in therapy. While you are in this interim period between therapists, could you work on articulating your feelings to yourself in a journal? That might help you when you do find a therapist. Then you will be ready with a number of important things to talk about. If it's hard to get started, you could even just read from your journal.

There are so many different types of therapists out there. Maybe by reading their "ads" at their web sites and in therapist directories, you could get a feel for what sort of therapist would be right for you. I sometimes browse such sites just for fun, even though I don't need another T! I read various ads and think, "Oh, I would not like her at all," or "hmmm, he sounds like he might be right up my alley."

I like Perna's idea of joining a support group and learning about good therapists through networking.

(I think also that you should have a family doctor! Maybe try to find one and go for a general physical exam and mention your depression and ask for a referral.)

Good luck, and hang in there.

[Doh2007]

Have you looked at the "Resources" here? You can put in your zip code and see who pops up. Also, somewhere there's a link to another web site that the doc started where you can get therapy online.