Ways your T makes you feel cared for.

When he responds to my texts/emails in a timely fashion, it makes me feel like he cares. (And he's been really, really good about that lately.)

And when he gets mad at me. When he gets mad, it makes me mad too. But I do think that if he didn't care about me at all, he wouldn't get mad.

Came to the treatment program house I was at multiple times when I was in crisis... Stayed the night on the cough one night. Stood up for me when the treatment team wanted to kick me out of the program. Took me to meet with his therapist when they were threatening to kick me out... So I could have a good backup t. Flew with me to another state to attend a hearing voices group fAcilitator training for 3 days. Drove me 2 hours to a different city and sat with and supported me thru the lawsuit mediation. Took me out to eat to celebrate something. Gave me silly gifts, cards, journals, and books. Let me sleep on the couch in his office when I wAsnt doing well. Let me sit on the porch one day when I was very upset after a session. Made me tea and hugged me and rested his head on my back while I was sitting there. Drove me to the hospital and visited me in it.

There's so much.. But the most important to me is that he has stuck by my side for the past 7 years, even though its been a roller-coaster as he called it. He is the most patient man I have ever met, even though I've tested that to the Max

I talked to my therapist about this once. I told her i know she goes above and beyond for everyone because thats her personality. that i know i am no one special because she does special stuff for everyone.
she took afront to that. she told me that yes she does like to do special things for people, but the stuff she does for me/ with me is stuff she definitely does NOT do with others. she said our relationship is very unique and different than she has wih anyone else.

Idk... I know she cares yet I can't really name anything that felt "extra" or felt like it was something I might not find with another therapist.
She says she cares, or will express worry but it has little effect on me.

The fact that he's reliable, attentive, and cautious makes me feel cared for. He's conscientious about scheduling, and always there when he says he will be unless there's an emergency. He cares enough that he remembers the things I say very keenly, and is careful to be precise about it when he mentions things I've said and ways I've described my experiences. He's kind and thoughtful and cares about my needs being met.

So I don"t necessarily think it's about doing things that are "extra" or above and beyond. Sometimes demonstrating caring is about doing what's needed and expected within the therapist's role, but filling your actions and words with an underlying kindness and caring that can be felt by your patients.

Longtime T: Persevered despite how difficult I was, saw me for a year pro bono, then on a reduced fee once I could afford to pay something, invested a lot in receiving training in different things specifically for my benefit, consulting with specialists about my case, always made me feel like I was worthy of care, patiently went over the same subjects again and again as many times as I needed, never gave up on or abandoned me, the list goes on and on.

T: Says she wants to work with me, even though I know I'm a bit difficult and frustrating, doesn't make me feel judged for my terrible decisions, says I deserve to succeed and be happy, acts like I'm not a freak, puts up with my inaudible voice and vague/secretive and circuitous ramblings, remembers significant things I've told her and links them to new information, is very sensitive to making sure I don't feel pressured into anything by her, thanks me when I give her a long, verbose piece of writing to read instead of rolling her eyes and sighing, doesn't reproach me when I admit to withholding information, doesn't say I told you so when I fail to act on something and things go downhill, seems quite pleased when I make good choices for myself

His commitment to the work we do together. His efforts to be consistent and how he can be flexible when I need that too. That I know I matter to him.

She told me that she's proud of me, because of my writing and the fact that my book was published this year. It almost felt like she said, "I love you."

One specific thing she did that made me feel cared for was calling me personally and scheduling an emergency session for me. I see my T at my university clinic, and a situation which is too complicated to explain here, that was very traumatic for me and involved a few administrators of my school... word got to my therapist, and she called me personally to set up this appointment, which meant she came to work an hour early just for me. I know many people have out of session contact with their T, but I don't. All appointments are made through the front desk, I had never spoken with my T on the phone before. Her personal phone call really touched me because I knew she went out of her way, that is not a normal thing that university clinic therapists do.

Something she does in general that makes me feel cared for... during some sessions, she will kind of pause our conversation and get very serious for a second (we're usually pretty goofy together) and look me in the eyes and tell me something very kind -- that she is proud of me for the progress I've made, for example. She is also very good at picking up on my body language. That's a normal thing for therapists, I assume, but all the same it feels good to be understood.

I think it's just for me the little things, like she will check I'm comfortable, make sure I'm warm enough, Make me feel understood and gives me a sense that no matter what she is there to just listen and support me!
I think I can be quite a demanding client at times, but she doesn't make me feel bad for that, and I know she reassures me as and when I need with that.
So far she's not let me down and that in itself makes me feel cared for.

He spent 90 mins with me today! I guess he did not have clients after me or felt he needed to make sure I was settled and doing ok before I left. He has been going over session time for a while. It is going to hurt when he schedules a client right after me and he has to actually keep to the regular session time.