Im afraid to fall in love with my doc :(

I was laughing about my doc with my roommate and felt special because I was his only inpatient and he drove to me from his another job. It made me feel special.
I got his phone number and texted him about meds. I have driven in his car because he didnt let me go alone outside and I needed something. He never touched me only gave me his hand when I almost hit the floor because of weakness. I was waiting for him everyday and my boyfriend hurt me so I was in hysyeria and wanted to kill myself but nurses as always did injection.

Now Im outside and feeling much better. Im going to therapy at the same place he works and see him every weak. I think if I saw him when he maybe walks there. Im afraid Im obsessing. Maybe I should say it to him and stop seeing him? My heart beats too fast when Im think of him. I dont think it would help me anyway only make me crazy.
I saw a dream that I should marry my boyfriend nexy day and I have doubts if I want to do it but before he hurt me I was so sure about him. Im too emotional, Im borderline. But my roommate at hospital also was obsessing about his doc.
O why we start to have feelings for our docs and how to stop them?
If I left him I would still go to therapy at the same house.
I can run away from all of them. I dont know what to do.

I'm glad you're out of the hospital, LS. Sorry to hear you're struggling with these feelings - that sounds very intense. I can understand why you'd want to run away.

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed by intense emotions? Can you distract yourself, maybe? I try doing some gardening, reading a book, or playing video games.

I has used to run to nurses but now Im taking my meds for anxiety. Im talking about bad throughs or anxiety.
About my doc I simply feel in love feelings which is burning me. And Im thinking of him.

It’s better for you to just see him as someone to help you emotionally. That’s his purpose for your benefit.

I did but then I start to have feelings for him. Im not sure if its real or just because I felt bad because of my boyfriend and lonely and depressed in hospital and he helped me with medication.

Likely the second. Many people on this site struggle with attachment to their therapists/doctors...often they are feeling alone and feel cared for by their therapist/doc.

When you really think about it, you don't truly know this man outside of his professional role. You may have absolutely nothing in common, who knows? And you have no idea what he is like outside of the professional setting. Rather, he is someone who cares about you and that feels good, so it becomes easy to attach to that.

I am totally attached to my therapist. Most likely, you're dealing with transference issues, like most of us do.
It hurts like hell.
I have told my T, and I feel a little better now. It still hurts and is hard, but it's a way to work through our issues, as well.

think of our Ts or pdocs as very caring, something we may not know... something we fall for.

You are definitely not alone with this, and sometimes taking can help a bit already....

I understand it but I sometimes feel like we are friends when we talk about his life little bit too. He is really open and friendly but I know he will never be mine and I dont want that my obsession destroys my health and he is really good doc, he helped me so much, he even talked to others how to help me, he said Im difficult patient and he said he was mad at himself when he thought he wouldnt help me. I hate myself for ruining everything with my feelings.

Same thing here. Im difficult and challenging, and she even tells me that amd u take it from her, she tells me about herself. We chat after sessions, ir she goes over and never minds.
I did tell her how afraid I was of losing her. She dealt with it well. I tild her I loved her, and its okay.
If its a good therapist, he should know about these feelings in clients.
They are just feelings. They are nothing bad.
Maybe you can learn from them, too.

I think its little difference between T and doc. My sessions are 20 minutes and its about meds and simptoms but about my feelings and emotions Im talking to my T.
So I think I would lose him but he is really good as a doc and as a person.
I hope I wont fall in love or its just side effect from being at hospital. I cried when I was home because I was missing that place and people but I visited my new friends there.
When you feel alone its high risk to attach people around. It happened to me. I hope its short time effect and maybe its because my doc made me feel special. Nurses told me - he drove from his another job just for you etc. Other patients told me that I have a young doc and he seems nice.
He was almost cursing while driving in a car with me and its not cool so maybe he is not cool outside work. He told me which pills he take or taken and other things.