[lunatic soul]

I told him about my attachment and he didnt change his face and said that it happens very often.
I wanted hug and he hugged me tight because he was afraid that I must be hospitalezed again and I dont want to.
Im really sad, I drove to hospital earlier to see him but he went away 5 minutes ago.
I started to cry and nurses told me to lie in bed and called him and he drove to me but it didnt help me.
Now I feel just really bad and want to get drunk.

[hopealwayz]

I’m so sorry. I know that is painful. Sending you a hug!

[lunatic soul]

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

I’m so sorry. I know that is painful. Sending you a hug!

I feel hopeless and desperate and suicidal but thank you.

I am so sorry. Perhaps, if you thought of and tried to see things through his perspective? Are your expectations then honestly realistic? Think too of what his life maybe like. Children, a relationship? If things transpired the way you want them to how very fair would that be? How would it impact him, his relationship, and life? Perhaps too think that you are very fortunate to have what time and help you do get from him. Accept that there are limitations. Limitations and boundaries are not an indication of your worth. Remember that. Let him know you acknowledge them. It is perfectly alright to let him know you find them difficult but let him know you will try. That will actually bring the two of you closer together than further apart. I know this is upsetting. I understand the situation feels impossible. Changes don't have made overnight. You can take them step by step, goal by goal. If you manage to accomplish one part of this seek acknowledgement you have done so. It is in this way you two can still work together

[NP_Complete]

I'm confused how you determined your doc doesn't like you. You said he hugged you and drove back to the hospital to see you. That doesn't sound like something someone who doesn't like you would do.

[mostlylurking]

I agree with NP, I don't see any evidence that your doctor doesn't like you. It sounds like he's concerned about you having to be hospitalized, plus he gave you a hug, and he returned to the hospital to see you when you had just missed him. All of that says he cares about you, to me.

When you told him about your attachment, he may have kept things professional to avoid worsening the situation for you, would be my guess. Was there something he said that was upsetting in particular?

[DP_2017]

Therapy messes with your head and emotions so much, I'd never ever do it again. its hell

I am sorry you feel this way, I'm a mess right now too

[lunatic soul]

Thank you all.
If you ask me about reaction to my attachment he simply said it happems to most of people.
He almost never change his face only sometimes when we talked about offtopic.
Im afraid to make him mad because I was missing him that much that I got panic attack and nurses called him. I was lying in bed in my very short dress and he sat far away from me. Nurse said dont make him mad. Im afraid he is already annoyed. He told me to take pills and sleep and nurses didnt let me go and said- you must do what your doc says or he will be mad.
I wanted to take drugs how bad I felt but I didnt.
Nurse said I should see him on monday.

The thing that hurts me is that he shows no emotions. Im afraid to annoy him. He didnt want to talk about my feelings but said I can see him everyday if I want to but we must talk about my health not about personal things.
I think he cares but he cares about all of his patients and I want to like him as a person not because he is afraid about me.