I wasn’t trying to get an emotional response, I just had to explain why her suggestion can’t work for me. She remembered the issues with my mom, but she forgot what I told her about my father (don’t stress—I fought him off at age 13 when I got dumped at his house/my mom w/multi MI disappeared for two years).

I’m not trying to make anyone including her feel sorry for me. I’m just trying to get through *work* issues now. Anyway, she made some suggestion that doesn’t work for me, so I had to explain more childhood stuff today since that’s where she goes.

She is surprised that I’m functional. Her eyes teared up. She says I’m the picture of resilience.

I guess, but that’s not how I feel. I narrowly made it out of childhood alive and functional for sure. Two of my pets weren’t so lucky. It was horrific, and I’m not sure that it is helpful to dig into that stuff.

There was a time when I needed to talk about that childhood stuff, but it was a long time ago. She is telling me my anxiety and reactions to people in my work environment relate to childhood, as well as some other issues I told her about.

Anyway, I really like this therapist, and she is very experienced. But if she’s going to tear up when I explain things, it makes me not want to talk. I don’t like to make people get emotional.

Therapy was hard today. I don’t know what to think.

[Tbhimscared]

Maybe you could explain how you see the situation? Like how her tearing up affects you and that it makes you feel guilty. She may realize that you telling the story isn't meant to share the pain but rather to give clarity on the subject. But she could be right and maybe things do in fact relate to your childhood and it would be worthwhile to get into. If youre open about how her reaction makes you feel maybe you'll find some common ground to work from. Best of luck! I wouldn't let go of a good therapist if I was in this situation but personally I would prefer my T to tear up than not show any emotion at all.

[malika138]

I agree that you might want to explain the situation to your T. Alternatively, tell her you don't want to talk about the past. We have the right to go where we want to go in our therapy. It could be that this is something you can explore down the road, if you want to.

Hang in there!!

You know, you guys are right.

I’m reluctant to just say some part of therapy is bothering me. I should at least tell her.

Maybe she can figure out something else or explain why we really need to do this.

Therapy isn’t easy.

It is nice to know she still has feelings after all these years of listening to people, true.