Personal Information About T

My therapist will sometimes share when it has a relationship to the immediate discussion. It doesn't bother me to know personal things about my therapist.

Our conversations are like coffee chats with me doing most of the talking, but I do learn a little about her, but not her family. She said years ago she decided to be an open book and answer questions of a personal nature if a client asked. I asked 18 months into our relationship. It has not damaged our relationship. It has helped me to be more patient and companionate to myself and to people in the real world.

When I did attachment therapy I asked questions of a personal nature all the time. She always answered. At times I did it to see if she would response. She never failed to answer, no matter how over the top.None of my therapist shared with out a point. With this therapist it was about getting a yes... instead of it's not your business. I could not take a blank slate therapist.

Yes, exactly.

They know I’m a young widow on top of all the other issues.

I want to know a lot about my t, and I do for better or worse. It’s a double edged sword. I want to know who I’m talking to but I also get jealous. And some of the things he believes make me wish he were a hard science guy at heart.

I’m with you. I saw one shrink for ten-years and knew him casually but never knew where he lived or much else. We were ‘therapy-friends,’ I’ve written. Polite, yes, but we both respected the idea that he was the professional in his office. I, on the other hand, was at the peak of a long-running mania and he knew everything about me.

I would be disturbed to learn that my shrink uses Facebook.

That would be so unsettling. I think that you must be a Facebook member to search for others? Then I need not worry.

As terrible as it sounds, I don't want to see my therapist as a person outside of the version of him that exists in our sessions. I tell him things I'm deeply ashamed of and trust him not to judge me and to handle everything like a professional. The more I see a therapist as a person, the more I worry about them judging me or being disappointed in me or being unable to handle something that I disclose.
I've had therapists in the past who did a lot of self disclosure. I'm glad my current one doesn't. Sure, I may be curious at times, but I don't want anything unrelated to my therapy to interfere with my ability to place my faith in him as it relates to my therapy.

For me, it was essential to know one key detail about her personal life, right at the first session. I had no idea we shared this kind of bond, and it was comforting to know she'd be able to help me even more so than a therapist that hadn't experienced that would. But too much information can get on the way. I'm going through transference right now, and at the beginning of therapy, I would frantically search for her personal info. Now, I've seen enough. lol

interesting discussion about the varying motives and ideas regarding therapy - its purpose and its methodology. Do you think that the therapist and/or psychiatrist actually reads what sort of therapy that is best for us or that which we would prefer?

Perhaps the reason I don't know anything about my psychiatrist is that he recognises the barrier I have put up about it. Perhaps then he has patients he conducts himself in the complete opposite manner. Maybe he does have patients he is closer to and maybe he even is in communication with them outside of their sessions. I suppose then I should be thankful that he recognises those limits I have myself placed upon the doctor/patient relationship. Thoughts?