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  #1  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 04:46 PM
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I've seen LCSWs in the past and always addressed them by their first names. My current T is a PsyD whom I've been seeing for like 3 months.

I don't remember if he introduced himself by name when we first met, and he's never had a reason to do so since, so I have no clue what he'd expect me to refer to him as.
I've continued to mentally refer to him as Dr. [Last Name]. I have no clue whether he'd think that that level of formality was weird given the conversations we have, or whether he'd think it was presumptuous of me to refer to him by his first name.
In our last appointment he was giving some hypothetical of someone saying something to him and used the shortened version of his first name, which caught me by surprise. I know his first name from his profile on the office website, but that's the full version of his first name and it didn't occur to me that he might go by that shortened version (like William to Will). I can't even imagine calling him that.
I'm in academia, and so I kind of go by those conventions (if someone outranks you in title or position then use the full title until they indicate otherwise, like signing an email with just their first name), but he's my therapist, not a work colleague, so I'm not sure what conventions apply.

Did your therapist tell you what to call them? Did you decide?

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  #2  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 04:54 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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There has never been a reason for me to address the therapist by any name. There are only two of us in the office. If I ever had a reason to address a therapist by name - I would use their first name unless the therapist wanted to use formal titles for both of us- then I would use her last name and I would expect her to use mine. I feel that way about any professional I hire. I don't call mds "doctor" if they call me by my first name. We will either all be informal and familiar or we all will not.

The two I saw recently were lcsw's - I have more education than they do. I saw one who had a phd - she was batshit crazy. If I had needed to address her by name - I would have used her first name.
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Last edited by stopdog; Apr 14, 2018 at 07:55 PM.
Thanks for this!
LabRat27
  #3  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:00 PM
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Yes but usually I just say hey or hi.... if I am emailing or something then sure I do
  #4  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:02 PM
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I'm in a somewhat similar situation as you. To my therapist I've never referred to them by any name. During our sessions I've never had any reason to do so.

When I sign in with the receptionist I always refer to my therapist by their first name, since that's how the receptionist refers to them, but I would feel strange calling my therapist that to their face during a session.

I guess asking them is the best way to go about it... they'll tell you what they prefer. You've given me a new task to do my next appointment.
Thanks for this!
LabRat27
  #5  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:10 PM
GeekyOne GeekyOne is offline
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My T is also a PsyD and yes, I do address her by her first name (that's how she introduced herself). It mostly happens only when we correspond out of session - sometimes by text message, and if I leave a voicemail. I also refer to her by her first name when talking about her to my pdoc.

It is important to me that my T introduces themselves by first name. I would struggle with the intimacy of the relationship juxtaposed with calling them "Dr. so-and-so".

I was thrilled when my pdoc introduced herself by her first name. She does longer appointments (25 minutes or so), with some therapy as well as med management. Although her office staff always reference her as Dr, I do not.

As far as I am concerned, my T and pdoc are just people. They are no better than me, we are equals. They have more education in medicine and psychology but I have more education in science, mathematics and engineering (no, I do not have a PhD).
  #6  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:12 PM
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He goes by his first name but has a doctorate
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  #7  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:12 PM
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I never refer to her by name in session. If she refers to herself, she uses her first name. When I email I use her first name. And I once asked her what she preferred; she said whatever felt comfortable for me. I'd suggest asking, and I'd expect he'd leave it up to you.
  #8  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:16 PM
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I use t's first name. She has a PhD.
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  #9  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:22 PM
maybeblue maybeblue is offline
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If I ever called him anything I would use his first name. Frankly I'm not even sure how to pronounce his last name. It has about a million letters, and I don't think he's ever pronounced it for me. I haven't had any reason to use his name to his face. He's called me by first name, so it seems fair.

I do think most therapists that I know personally, even if they are doctors, use their first names with their clients.
  #10  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:22 PM
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I've always used their first names. And call the psychiatrists Dr. (Whatever.) I pick social workers, so they don't have doctorates.
  #11  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:32 PM
ChickenNoodleSoup ChickenNoodleSoup is offline
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I use his last name. Sometimes he slips up and uses pronouns meant for if you‘d use first name. I never do.
  #12  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:36 PM
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I called mine (Ph'D) Dr. for the first 6 months, and then he told me to use his first name. I will sometimes call him Dr. First Name , as kind of a gentle vote of respect if it has been a tough conversation.
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  #13  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 05:56 PM
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My therapist is a PsyD. I use his first name. The first email I sent I tried Dr. Lastname, but it seemed all wrong. He signs his emails with just his first name, so that's what I started using.
  #14  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 06:00 PM
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I don't actually say her name in session (maybe once or twice when i said something happened and I was like "Oh, C will like this!), but in e-mails I use her first name. She is also very casual and introduced herself to me by her first name. She is also an LCSW, though even if she had a PhD, I think she probably would still go by her first name.

My last T was a psychologist with a PhD, but referred to herself by her first name. In e-mails and in my head, she was Dr. D. I am not sure if it was because she was more formal, or that her first name is the same of my mother's so I was more wary to use it...but i never called her by her first name.
  #15  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 06:00 PM
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I asked. She told me I could use her first name. I prefer it. Even when she signs emails, it's first name only.
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  #16  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 06:07 PM
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My old PhD therapists went by “dr” but my current lpc therapist goes by his first name. It was weird for me at first now it feels natural.
  #17  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 06:31 PM
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T is an LCSW and PhD. I call her by her first name. Others call her Dr.
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  #18  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 06:34 PM
Anonymous47147
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I use her first name or more usually a nickname I made up for her.
  #19  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 06:34 PM
bobcat21 bobcat21 is offline
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I don’t. I feel weird saying Hi ( insert name here) it would feel awkward to me unless she says okay call me instead of Dr that would be okay but I would still feel a tiny bit still awkward because I’m so used to calling everyone Dr etc etc
  #20  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 07:07 PM
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My T has a PhD, and I call her by her first name. I don't remember how I landed on that since our first meeting is lost to the mists of time. She mentioned at one point that she prefers when clients call her by her first name. She said some people call her Dr. Firstname and it makes her think of Dr. Phil, who she dislikes.
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight
  #21  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 07:12 PM
Anonymous43207
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I use her first name. She's an MA/LPC.
  #22  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 07:14 PM
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I’m getting a therapist who is a doctor. So I’m calling him Dr. Last name.

At least I think that’s what I’ll call him. Someone else in the clinic referred to him that way.
  #23  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 07:36 PM
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My t and I have the same education level so if I were to address her, it would be by first name. When I repeat a conversation, say, I've had with H about her, I use her first name in context. When I'm in the waiting room, I've noticed that her receptionist tends to refers to her on the phone with other clients as Dr. X. The few times the receptionist has called me, she refers to t by first name. My guess is that t lets clients take the lead on what to call her. I'm rambling...
Thanks for this!
LabRat27
  #24  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 07:37 PM
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I don't usually address mine by name. I would probably use first name thouth.
  #25  
Old Apr 14, 2018, 07:46 PM
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My T is a PhD. In the first few sessions, I talked about my marriage counselor (also a PhD), but referred to him by his first name. T knows him, and at first, he was calling him by his first name, but then switched to "Dr. [last name]." I asked him about that (and some other stuff) in an e-mail. Instead of really answering that question, he said how he asks clients to call him "Dr. [last name]," because when they call him by his first name, they tend to be more concerned about how he's doing personally. When therapy isn't about him. And how the person clients pay to see is "Dr. [last name]." So he wants clients to use "Dr. [last name]." I will say when I first got that e-mail, it struck me as rather pretentious. But, I call him (like if I'm e-mailing him) by "Dr. [last name]." And I think in some ways, it's been easier for me to separate him as a T from him as a person. So maybe there is something to that?

Ex-T was an LCSW, and I called her by her first name--both to her face/via e-mail or text and to others. (She was fine with it.) My (former) marriage counselor is a PhD, and to his face/via e-mail, I generally referred to him as "Dr. [last name]." But when I talked about him to other people, with H, it was just [lastname] (no "doctor"). And when talking about him to ex-T, once I'd started talking about the transference, or, in the beginning, current T, he was just [first name]. And that's how I thought of him in my head, too. But, again, to him, I generally still referred to him as "Dr. [last name]."
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