[stopdog]

Do you want/like the therapist to act/be/seem protective of you?

No. That would make me uncomfortable. I dont want any personal type feelings at all. Just business.

[atisketatasket]

No. I don’t know if I would leave, but no. Protectiveness from a relative stranger while sitting on a couch in a suburban office (the type of therapist I see) doesn’t ring true.

[AllHeart]

My t has been quite protective of me mainly in regard to dealings around my ex-t and I did/do like it. It was one of many pieces that helped me get through the traumatic experience and also helped to build my trust in her.

[Echos Myron redux]

I've gone with other. I know my therapist has had moments where he has felt protective of me, and yeah, there's definitely a part of me that likes that, but it's not what I look to him for, and it can be problematic when it gets in the way of him being present (as it has once or twice) so I wouldn't go as far as to say I like it.

[weaverbeaver]

No, I wouldn’t like that because it would feel like manipulation or coercion

[MRT6211]

Yes my T has been very protective of me when my school was trying to discriminate against me based on my mental health issues. She brought out her mama bear side. I appreciated it greatly.

[Salmon77]

I can't think of anything my T could "protect" me from. But in any case, I would rather take care of myself. So no.

I said maybe.

On one hand, I want her to understand my feeling and maybe feel a little empathy about it and, yeah, it would be nice to feel protected for once.

On the other handnn I really need her to be willing to challenge me and tell me the hard things and that would be harder if she did feel protective.

I guess I'm leaning towards no. I knoq i can handle tough stuff on my own and, really, no one can protect anyone from anything. Life happens and there's no stopping it.

[feralkittymom]

Former T was and I both wanted and needed him to be. It took various forms: being available, somehow creating the sense that I wasn't alone with overwhelmingly frightening feelings, and a certainty that for that time of session, nothing bad could happen to me. There were a couple of times when something unexpected would happen--one night someone came into the outer office when he wasn't expecting anyone, and so he was "on alert," went out to check, and it was a former client who was just driving by and stopped in to say hello and thank him (he had moved away from the city). There was a definite sense in that moment of physical protectiveness.

With current T, not at all. If anything, I think I'd need to be the one protecting her! But I don't have the same needs anymore, so it's fine.

[ruh roh]

I don't know if it's being a mama bear, but every so often my therapist takes on building workers or others who cause issues in the hallway. Even though I can and do stand up for myself out in the wild, it feels great when I know she's got my back and will even go to bat for me (and other clients, since I assume she does the same for everyone). I have never had that in my life and sometimes it just plain feels good to not always be the one to take action when other people are being a problem.

[velcro003]

i put "maybe." My T has mentioned before that she is protective of all of her clients, but i've not experienced any sort of personal feelings from her to me, which I am glad for. I also knows she will hug clients if they ask, but i can't imagine ever wanting a hug from her. I would find it so weird.

[Amyjay]

No. I am responsible for me.

[growlycat]

I don’t need it but I do like it.

[nottrustin]

So when I said in another post T is protective of me what I meant is that she is protective is careful who and what she recommends. When we were discussing me potentially seeing an EMDR T as well as when I was looking for a psych NP she was very selective as to who she would recommend or prefer I see. She knows I am pretty complicated.

I like that she cares enough to think about my safety and well being.

[toomanycats]

I appreciate my Ts' protective feelings, but I've absolutely clashed with J (my interim T between exT and current T -- and the one I see when current T is on vacation) and with Group T when the 2 of them discussed exT and whether or not they were required to report him. Sheer panic on my part.... and anger. But then I realized that being protected doesn't always feel good.... and I was grateful that someone had actually considered protecting me (and exT's other clients of course). They ultimately did not report him, which I appreciated. I did feel cared about.

Current T expresses protective feelings... that feels good.

I want my autonomy and adulthood respected...but it's good to feel protected too...

She is very protective of me. I like it. My family never cared. It is nice that my therapist does.

[skeksi]

I said yes and I like it.

For example, we are doing some more trauma work right now and he has said repeatedly that he wants us to go really slow because it is important to him that I not be destabilized. For me “protective” means he doesn’t want me to be hurt if it can be avoided.

[LostOnTheTrail]

I get the sense that she cares, but there's nothing 'protective' about it, from where I am sitting. This time around, therapy has been about helping me to cultivate a sense of safety within my own mind. For now, she is a part of that, but eventually, I hope to be able to summon up those feelings myself.

[InnerPeace111]

I like it.

[MoxieDoxie]

My Ex-T was very protective of me and it felt tabooish because I never had anyone care that much for me to be protective. I felt bad for liking it. I also felt that if I accepted it then I would become weak and let my guards down.

[autonoe]

I voted other. My current therapist doesn't really act protective, but during a couple of stories I shared with him, he said something like, "That makes me really angry for you." It bordered on protective or felt like he was taking a stand for me. I didn't know how to feel about it. It validated my experiences, but also, I didn't know if his feelings were sincere or if he just wanted me to think they were. My T stays pretty neutral and I guess that works for me.

[maybeblue]

I said "maybe." I guess it depends what protective looks like. On the one hand if I tell them something that someone did or said to me that was abusive, it feels nice if they act a little angry at the abuser. And it does generally go better if they approach negative feedback gently with me.

But on the other hand if they act or say something that suggest I shouldn't do something or be with someone because I am too "fragile" or it is "dangerous" that will always piss me off. I have a real aversion to anyone trying to tell me I "can't" or "shouldn't" do something. Generally that just means I'll do it for sure.

[mcl6136]

No. That would suggest that she believes at least some of my lies.

[DP_2017]

I don't want it but it's nice. I like when he walks on the traffic side of things during walks, and how he gets really annoyed when I discuss my mom and basically just gets into a defend me type stance. I think protectiveness from anyone can be nice at times, but I'm also a head strong independent person who does not allow it much at all from people...