I’m in agony

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 12:41 PM

I can’t really get into the details about it now but he’s totally changed.

And he didn’t even give me a proper termination session even though I requested it several times. I’m hurting so much.

DP_2017 · Jul 20, 2018, 12:49 PM

I thought you were going Monday? I'm sorry you're hurting but he doesn't even sound like someone I'd wanna be friends with. Hopefully you can find another great t in the future and make some friends that treat you well and make you happy

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 01:02 PM

I was supposed to go on Monday but he suddenly decided that he wasn’t seeing patients on that day.

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 01:05 PM

Just 3 days ago, he was saying kind words to me and last night, his mean words tore me to shreds.

DP_2017 · Jul 20, 2018, 01:05 PM

Sounds like it might not be worth bothering with. He sounds like he's being a jerk and you don't need it. Sucks you didn't get closure but maybe start looking for a new t. Hope they will be good for you

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 01:08 PM

I emailed my psychiatrist and told him what was going on and he said that he’d try to get in touch with him.

Salmon77 · Jul 20, 2018, 01:26 PM

That must be really painful. Sounds like maybe he's different in his personal life than he is when he's doing therapy. It's hard to let go but if he's acting like that maybe he's not a good person to have in your life.

Taylor27 · Jul 20, 2018, 01:30 PM

Hopefully your pdoc will talk to him and see if you can get into see him hugs

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 02:20 PM

They do have me on the T schedule for August 20th. I just cannot believe this hurts so bad. I want to run from the pain. My heart feels shattered.

Deejay14 · Jul 20, 2018, 02:44 PM

Hope again my heart breaks for you that you are in such emotional upheaval. Have you ever worked on distress tolerance with your therapists. That could really help you out so you do not have to feel agony, rejection and other stuff taking hold so strongly.

Wishing you the best.

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 03:39 PM

Thanks. I have worked on distress tolerance but somehow my severe anxiety gets in the way. I’m prescribed anxiety meds PRN but sometime I feel weak when I take them.

My T did say if I gave him some space right now, we’d probably be fine.

I actually have another New T scheduled for August 3rd and he seems very knowledgeable and supportive.

There is one I’m trying to get into but I have to pay my balance before I can see him.

Current T wasn’t really fair at all.

My PDOC was supposed to talk to T today and neither one of them have mentioned anything so I’m kind of worried now.

DP_2017 · Jul 20, 2018, 03:47 PM

Give new t a try
Might be better. Giving other space is good and maybe just let that go all together. Find some good friends worthy of your time that wont upset you like this

Also with new t. Keep it professional. Don't go there hoping to be friends someday. Go hoping he can help you get better and lead a happier life. Talking from experience. Those types of expectations can ruin you mentally. Therapists generally don't do friends with clients even after, sadly.

SalingerEsme · Jul 20, 2018, 06:15 PM

August 2oth is way too long to go feeling this way?

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 07:24 PM

He said he needed a break from me.

hopealwayz · Jul 20, 2018, 07:26 PM

Also, in June he was the one who said let’s take a break and work towards friendship.

Deejay14 · Jul 20, 2018, 08:06 PM

Yes Hope if he said that to you....that's a huge red flag. If he can't see you for an hour a week, he's going to be a friend?!?? How is that even logical. It's not right for him to suggest being a friend. He is a hired professional and that's it. He would not be able to be a friend for a long time even if he could.

If your next therapist offers to be anything but a paid professional run the other way! I would also consider a female therapist who keeps very good boundaries.