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View Poll Results: Do you take off your shoes for sessions
Yes 21 26.92%
Yes
21 26.92%
Sometimes 6 7.69%
Sometimes
6 7.69%
No 51 65.38%
No
51 65.38%
Voters: 78. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 09:28 AM
ChickenNoodleSoup ChickenNoodleSoup is offline
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The first thing I do when entering my Ts office is taking off my shoes. I just realized that maybe not all people do that and I wonder how many do vs. don't.

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  #2  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 09:32 AM
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Favorite Jeans Favorite Jeans is offline
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I kick 'em off so I can put my feet up on the couch.
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awkwardlyyours
  #3  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 09:38 AM
awkwardlyyours awkwardlyyours is offline
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Yes! I take them off outside the therapy room actually and then shut the actual therapy office door -- which means she opens the main door and goes before me into her room rather than the other way around as apparently she does with other clients (took her some getting used to).

I didn't do it earlier but after a while, I decided I wanted to sit on the floor rather than the couch. And, then a little while later, I progressed to wanting to chuck shoes.

I think shoes are the bane of the world -- they constrict thinking, happiness, you name it. I drive without shoes. In my former job, I'd work and walk around without shoes etc. In restaurants / coffee shops, if I'm sitting down, shoes are off pretty much immediately. Just about any place I can get away with not having shoes, I'll totally do it.

(And yes, in my mind, there's a paranoid part screaming "Oh gawd, what if this place is swarming with Hep C" etc. In therapy, I told her that I was concerned there were flesh-eating bacteria in the place I sat because all other clients would be sitting on the couch and placing their feet on the part of the floor where I sat -- she insisted there weren't such bacteria [not sure how she knew], then told me about the cleaning schedule and that most clients apparently sit on the side of the couch that is very close to her and not where I sit.....so, yay?!).

Shoe-less = freedom.
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mostlylurking, ruh roh
  #4  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 09:42 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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For me, absolutely not. It would be the equivalent of handing them a sharpened sword and putting my neck right under it. Babies/small children don't wear shoes, adults do. When people want to trap you, one of the first things they take from you is shoes.
It makes escape harder.

Also, to me, it is an act of extreme familiarity. Familiarity of that sort is not something I think is a good idea to have around a therapist.

And I like wearing shoes. They make me feel safe and strong.
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  #5  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 09:53 AM
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atisketatasket atisketatasket is offline
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Nope. Gotta have something on my feet when I bolt and run for the hills.

Also I have often found it to be a good idea not to have too many potential missiles at hand during therapy.

More seriously, I only take off my shoes in my own home or if I visit someone who clearly expects shoes to come off at the door. I would not feel comfortable removing them in what’s supposed to be a professional setting.
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  #6  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 10:22 AM
PurpleBlur PurpleBlur is offline
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i always take my shoes off
  #7  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 10:23 AM
awkwardlyyours awkwardlyyours is offline
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Being barefoot isn't uncommon outside the West -- so, the connotations/norms around it aren't at all universal but specific to a certain Western understanding (or a relevant non-Western culture in question).

Some nascent research on the benefits of going barefoot --
- a simple summary from WaPo

- A couple of the studies the WaPo article seems to be referencing (can't vouch though for the kosher-ness of the journals or the authors) --
Earthing (grounding) the human body reduces blood viscosity-a major factor in cardiovascular disease. - PubMed - NCBI

Earthing: Health Implications of Reconnecting the Human Body to the Earth's Surface Electrons

Can electrons act as antioxidants? A review and commentary. - PubMed - NCBI

And, some research on barefoot running (or just running as most of the rest of the non-Western world would call it!) --
Working memory is better after a barefoot run -- ScienceDaily
and
http://barefootrunning.fas.harvard.edu/
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  #8  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 10:36 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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I certainly understand some of these things are cultural as well as simple personal choice. I and others explained their choices.
I would not ever take my shoes off at any professional appointment or at work unless I was faced with a situation like when I was in Japan where it was the cultural norm or when visiting someone's home who set that as their requirement (I would also then choose to meet them in other places rather than their home).
No one who has posted they do not, that I saw, condemned those who choose to do so. I don't see the links posted above as having any relevance to my choices when dealing with a therapist in any way.
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  #9  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 10:39 AM
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  #10  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 10:41 AM
awkwardlyyours awkwardlyyours is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
For me, absolutely not. It would be the equivalent of handing them a sharpened sword and putting my neck right under it. Babies/small children don't wear shoes, adults do. When people want to trap you, one of the first things they take from you is shoes.
It makes escape harder.

Also, to me, it is an act of extreme familiarity. Familiarity of that sort is not something I think is a good idea to have around a therapist.

And I like wearing shoes. They make me feel safe and strong.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
I certainly understand some of these things are cultural as well as simple personal choice. I would not ever take my shoes off at any professional appointment or at work. No one, that I saw, condemned those who choose to do so.
I didn't think you were condemning but I wanted to respond to the bolded statements to say that that isn't universal.
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ruh roh
  #11  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 10:44 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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Dude - nothing I say is universal. I don't believe anything anyone else says is universal. I don't believe in the concept of universal in a vacuum as being what everyone on earth is going to agree with me on. I believe what I think is true - no one else needs to agree with me. In my culture - babies and small children don't necessarily wear shoes. Hippies may get thrown in there as well. Adults do wear shoes in professional settings unless they are professional swimmers or yoga instructors. I stand by that.
Barefoot does not equal freedom to me nor do I find shoes constricting.
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Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
Thanks for this!
susannahsays
  #12  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 11:02 AM
Anonymous55498
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My last T once told me that at the office of one of his old mentors, everyone took off shoes and left them outside of the meeting room. I had no clue why he said that, I never talked about anything similar, it was kinda out of context.

I have no issues wearing shoes as long as they are comfortable but I like to be without them in relaxed settings. Examples: in my and friends' homes, spas, meditation places, hanging out in a park, at beaches and pools obviously... Also no problems taking my shoes off at the doctor when I need to. I sometimes change shoes at work. But I don't take them off and stay without shoes in professional meetings - for me therapy is that. I personally don't see the point - I think if I did, that would make me more uncomfortable. I also would not go to therapy sessions in very causal clothes that I wear at home or for exercise. I like wearing open shoes though and do that whenever possible/appropriate in the summer, including for therapy and business.
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atisketatasket
  #13  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 11:59 AM
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TrailRunner14 TrailRunner14 is offline
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If I am in his office and feel myself start to go away, I take my shoes off and feel the texture of rug he has in his office with my toes. It helps to ground me.

Sometimes my feet will actually tingle when I’m not feeling “all there” and it helps to feel the solid floor.
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ruh roh
  #14  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 12:14 PM
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velcro003 velcro003 is offline
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Yep. I wear slip-on shoes, so off they go so i can put my feet up on the couch. If i could be barefoot always, i would.
  #15  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:06 PM
MessyD MessyD is offline
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Yes, now we both kick our shoes off as soon as we sit down.
  #16  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:12 PM
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Yes, always. I like to curl up in the chair and stuff.
  #17  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:16 PM
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SlumberKitty SlumberKitty is offline
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Nope. Shoes gotta stay on. Occasionally my choice of footwear is cause for light discussion at the beginning or end of therapy, even though personally I never found loafers to be that big of a discussion starter but I do have many colors and some with special features (i.e. studs etc).
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atisketatasket
  #18  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:18 PM
Anonymous43207
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We both do when I do a sand tray. It's just more grounding I guess. Sometimes I do right when I get there. Haven't done that in awhile though.
  #19  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:32 PM
starfishing starfishing is offline
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No, other than rare weather-related occasions--I think I left my boots in the waiting room once or twice because they were covered in muddy snow, and I took off my shoes once because I'd gotten caught in an unexpected downpour and my cold drenched shoes and socks were proving to be a distraction.
  #20  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:40 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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For those of you that do take your shoes off - is it therapist specific or do you do it at the dentist, hair dresser, lawyer etc?
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Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
  #21  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:45 PM
ChickenNoodleSoup ChickenNoodleSoup is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
For those of you that do take your shoes off - is it therapist specific or do you do it at the dentist, hair dresser, lawyer etc?
I only do this with my therapist, I don't take off my shoes anywhere else except for at my house/houses of friends. (and when going for a swim or sometimes when hanging out with friends.)
Thanks for this!
TrailRunner14
  #22  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 01:46 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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Do you know why you do it?
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Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
  #23  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 02:02 PM
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I leave my shoes on. The first time I went to Ts off I noticed she had a nat next to the door with shoes. So I started to take them off. She told me not to.
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  #24  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 02:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
For those of you that do take your shoes off - is it therapist specific or do you do it at the dentist, hair dresser, lawyer etc?


I do not like to go without shoes. Like you, I think they feel safe.

I do wear sandals and flip flops most of the summer, so it’s not about covering my feet

I guess I would consider it therapeutic.
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"Hope knows that if great trials are avoided, great deeds remain undone and the possibility of growth into greatness of soul is aborted." - Brennan Manning
  #25  
Old Aug 31, 2018, 02:19 PM
ChickenNoodleSoup ChickenNoodleSoup is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
Do you know why you do it?
It's how I feel most comfortable. I feel shoes are something that makes the whole thing feel professional. And if I'm professional I'm certainly not being authentic and emotional. Which for me is the reason why I go to therapy, my emotions are kind of messed up. So I don't want to change those by being professional.
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