[granite1]

todays phone conversation with my therapist...

T, hello granite this is T, im calling to check in to see if you are wanting to start up your therapy again.

ME, yes

T,oh good so what time do you want ?

ME, 3pm

T, ok our usual time ill see you next thursday at 3.

ME, so you are not going to be in the office today ?

T, oh i can come in today if you want. sense i have been out sick i just wanted to call and get out therapy back on track but if you want to come in today ill come in .

ME, i have been coming in to see you for the last 2 weeks .

T, with a slight amused sound she said oh then i guess ill see you at 3 bye now

i dont know what to do .i have been seeing her in her office for the last 2 weeks .she doesn't seem to have any memory of this at all . and the way she said i can come in to the office if i want suggests that i might be her only client . im scared for her and myself. idont want to have to look for another therapist.i dont even know how to begin to do that .the thought of no longer seeing my T terrifies me and it hurts me to the core. we have had our issues but she has helped me so much .i dont know if i can deal with her memory problems . i wonder if she remembers from week to week what we have talked about and how helpful she can be at this point .when i see her she seems ok except she does tend to get very emotional at times .even cries at times.how do i deal with this .it hurts my heart .

[LonesomeTonight]

Wow, so you think she forgot she even saw you the past 2 weeks? I'd be really concerned about that... Had she not said "Our usual time," I'd think that perhaps she thought she'd called a different client. Are you seeing her today? I'd talk about your concerns...hugs...

[SlumberKitty]

I think I would be really concerned too, if I were in your shoes. It's hard when you've seen a T for a long time to see them not be themselves. ((hugs))

[unaluna]

This is kind of retraumatizing. Her not remembering is like your mother not seeing you for yourself. So having your t reenact that, i can see why you would say that strikes you at your core. It is the core of a - some - therapeutic relationship. She might be able to guide you thru this in her moments of clarity, but really, in your shoes, i would try to find someone else.

[stopdog]

Could you just tell her that you are concerned, what your concerns are and why? I would just tell her.
The first one I saw had a terrible memory. I am not kidding when I say the only reason I think she remembered my name was because she wrote it down in her calendar each week. I don't think she had any independent recollection. She asked me about a cat a week after I had written and told her it died. I don't think they pay that much attention nor do they try to retain info.
The part that pissed me off was when she would guess rather than just ask me.

[rainbow8]

granite, it sounds like your T definitely has a memory problem. I know it will be difficult, but I suggest bringing it up with her directly. It is sad, but you need her to be honest with you. Maybe she is capable of working with you, or maybe not. I'm sorry this is happening. She's been a good T for you even with some difficult times. Possibly you can do some more good work even if she forgets sessions. Maybe she is on a med that causes memory loss and is temporary. You have a right to ask her because you're paying for a service. Or, you can continue until it becomes obvious one way or another whether your T can work despite her medical condition.

[ruh roh]

Oh man, I am so sorry. It's like losing your therapist without any acknowledgement that she's gone. An unrecognized loss is hard to grieve, but it's a grief that runs deep.

[RaineD]

Does she have a medical condition, or is it age-related? This sounds really hard, I'm sorry.

[granite1]

Thanks bunches for all the caring responses. the session went ok .ill write about it in a new post when i have time