Did you ever ask your T if they dated a former client?

I don't suspect my t would do that so I have no reason to ask her.

I agree with you. You are quoting my words where a posed a question using casual use of language--it's not meant to be literal and didn't mean to cause confusion.

The intention of the focus of this thread wasn't to be an argument about whether it's 'ok' and I generally don't support a T being in a relationship with former clients but do not see it that black and white. Hence the interpretation of the language.

I wondered if anyone has asked their T a question like this. If anyone works in the field or is a therapist or knows of someone in this situation, I'm also interested.

I see that stuff as none of my business. I'd never ask that

It seems a few people have that perspective; mine is quite different.

My T encourages free association; to just say what's on my mind. I also tend to leave behind the *shoulds* (or should not) in therapy because we work in an exploratory way.

Not putting restrictions on myself helps me discuss the truth of my thoughts and motivations and curiousities which allows me to sort of discover who i am while unlearning who I *should* be.

Therapy is a safe place for me to express my thoughts and feelings. I had no healthy self expression experience or encouragement of it during childhood-nothing positive-so expressing myself in a relationship and navigating through it is part of my work.

I get that and my t is very open too. I ask tons of personal stuff but dating life is like sex life to me. Not my business. I don't care who he's dated or slept with. Doesn't change who he is to me

I know a therapist who married one of his former clients, who is also a T but no longer practicing. I don't know if they waited for 2 years but he says he would never talk to a client about how he met his wife or that she is a former client. I know them from my personal life, that's how I know it.

Cool. I'm personally ok with it. If they truly love each other...why not?

I think it happens more than they admit. In my larger group of acquaintances I know it has happened. I doubt any of them would admit it to a current client who asked. That would be asking for more trouble, in my opinion, than the dating.

I have a relaxed view on this as well and I dated people I first met in professional contexts and structures that many people do not think is appropriate to turn into dating, had no issues due to the structure at all. People meet in all sorts of ways and I don't believe that dating the T would be dangerous or negative for every client. But I think it is better to keep it private. I would not have high opinion on a T that shared with me his personal endeavors with a client even if I were in principle curious about it.

I am a survivor of therapist/client exploitation.

I think it would be odd of me not to question my subsequent therapists.
The last two subsequent therapists didn’t seem to have an issue answering.

no I'm pretty sure he would never do that. he's married anyway (not that that matters to some people)