Couch 184: Welcome to Zanzibar!

Awwwwww bearded dragons? They are adorable

Shy dogs are my favorite!!! They take a lot of work and patience but the reward is amazing. My dog that I still have was that way. He hated men, and eventually worked as a therapy dog.

What i did, was spend a lot of time gaining his trust and bonding with him. Walks were the best way. I'd take him on walks every day and sometimes bring treats to give him as we walk.

Another thing was exposure therapy so to speak. I got him used to people more by exposing him to people. Starting small like on walks (maybe give the person a treat or ask a neighbor to come up to YOU to say hi... ) or taking him to a park.

Then we would go to places like the pet store, the workers gave treats and such. As much as many people HATE Cesar Millan.. the no touch, no talk, no eye contact is vital here. This goes for strangers. They can offer a treat but casually, not by saying "Here's a cookie" or by looking and oohing and awing over them, but just having their hand out and letting the dog sniff and take it.

Remember to award GOOD behaviors. If your dog is coming to you, or taking treats or whatever you want them to do, praise them, pet them. Things like that. It's a huge trust building thing, it took many months for my dog to come around.

Feel free to message me if you need more info. Good luck

As for the house training, the no thing, is not very liked in the training community. It's punishing bad behavior as opposed to praising good. Dogs dont have the ability to rationalize. So they are in the here and now.

Taking him out often is good but what you do is when he eliminates outside,then you praise him.

As frustrating as accidents in the home may be, it doesn't really do anything for him except say "Ok, she's upset" and that can make an already shy dog, even more shy. It takes time, they have to adjust to new ways of life. Walks can help with this too, again, rewarding them for going on walks.

Last resort is a kennel, I'm not a fan of them personally but for training things they can help. IF you have to go out somewhere, you can try doing that. It seems to help many people.

When my dog was a puppy, and well, he was dying, we used puppy pads. Putting them all over, causally picking them up if soiled and calmly talking them outside. Most dogs catch on quickly. good luck

Thanks! We’ve been taking him for walks and this AM was the first time since Thursday he didn’t try to run right back into the house. I’ll try some of the tips you gave me about slowly introducing him to other people.

Thanks! I didn’t know saying no was frowned upon in training. That’s new information for me. I’ll stop doing that and probably put pads down today in the spots he’s been eliminating in the house.

Does anybody have any advice about making an uncomfortable couch more comfortable? The couch in our living room is attractive (only because my roommate picked it out--I'm terrible at that kind of thing) but when it comes to actually sitting on it holy moly I think it might be a torture device left over from the Spanish Inquisition.

I don’t have any advice on the couch. But holy moly your house is clean. I will pay top dollar to however cleans your house to come clean mine.

Hahahhaa thank you--that would be yours truly. Chihirochild at your service!

(It helps that it's just my roommate and me--no kids or pets. Also my bedroom is definitely messier.)

How much do you want an hour to clean? And how soon can you get to NJ?

I have the same issue with a couch! My dad insisted on buying me one he found online. It looks good, but I find it too uncomfortable to sit on. My cat is the only one who sits on it. My old couch looked terrible, because the cats had torn it up. But it was very comfortable. I could nap on it. To me, comfort is more important than looks.

Sell the couch to a therapist. Their couches are never comfortable.

my sister and her fiance have a very shy dog. They are pretty sure she was abused in a previous home. But she's just the sweetest, sweetest thing and so smart!! she remembers me every time I visit and that's maybe once per year. This last time I was there in July, she came over to me when I sat down on the sofa and laid her head in my lap! My sister was like she NEVER does that with anyone! i truly felt so honored.

we need a button for that!

I dunno, my t's couch was pretty comfy I thought. It was like an old friend to me. She started talking about replacing it not long ago and I was like I don't think there's anything wrong with it. I bet she replaces it now that I left though!

My girl cat Ebony I'm certain was abused in a previous home, she was such a sweetheart though once she knew she could trust us

I still miss her so much

And after NJ, you can come warm up in AZ and clean my house!

Isnt that the sweetest feeling? My cousins dog did that to me once, i was dogsitting her and had taken her on a really long walk that morning, then later we were sitting on the couch and i was on the phone and i said "walk" and she plopped her head on my lap like "are you nuts? No way dude im not moving from this couch!" Its a really communicative gesture.

My fellow residents and I did the math once--at 80h/wk we earn about $14/hr. That's a darn good deal for a house cleaning, don't you think?

I have Christmas presents laying all over my living room and I’m just ready to get rid
of them all. One stack will be out of here on Wednesday, but the rest not until Christmas Day. I’ll probably come home from dinner at my in-laws on Christmas Day and take the tree down. I want my living room space back.

You went to school, became a doctor and earn $14.00 an hour? I’m so sorry. I will assume that increases greatly once you are out of residency.
I normally don’t tell people this but I make $18.00 an hour nannying. I have no special degrees or license. So the fact that a doctor makes 14-even a resident boggles my mind.

I am fan of crates for newly rescued dogs. My dogs have always liked their crates and a couple loved them - so much that when we tried to take them down after a year or so -we had to put the crates right back up because the dog was bereft. For my dogs, the crate was their safe space and they would sleep in it even when they could have had the couch, dog beds or our bed.

We are probably going to get one and leave the door open for him to go in and out as he wishes.

Yep that's what I do, although my dog never wishes LOL

My old dog who passed used to love it though, he would randomly nap in there.

I always let them wander the house though when we are gone.

We always had one in the bedroom and one in the hall at the living room so they could see us but not be in the mix if they did not want to be. The dog who loved his crate the most had been tied up on a rope for the first 10 -11 months of his life next door to a family member of my person - they lived in another state and when she went to visit, she went and just told them she was taking him. He had no muscle development at all and we had to put the food on the floor because the dog bowl freaked him out (along with everything else). I always thought he was a sort of lunkhead even after he grew into the household, but my person loved him a lot.

Hah yeah it is *extremely* silly.

It definitely gets better once we're out of residency, though--work 40-60h/wk and make about three times as much. So there's hope of paying off those med school loans!

What worked for us, with dogs that had never been in a crate, was to throw treats and toys in but not shut the door at first, then we would put them in it with treats and shut the door for a short time, and so on. I believe that crating helps house train and keeps them from putting themselves in peril in a new place. If not the crate, when we had one foster who was too big for crate, we put him in the bathroom (nothing for him to chew up in ours) with a baby gate. For the rest of his life, he would go into the bathroom to sleep or rest when he really needed to get away from everyone (we knew the people who adopted him).