[coolibrarian]

I'm trying to forget about how much I miss my T, how angry I am at her, how much Little Cool feels abandoned, and anxiety.Why am I trying to forget? Because when I remember, I get very angry, and, having no one to vent the rage on, my anger turns inward and I become depressed. When I want to really vent my rage, I don't want to be told "you're strong, you'll get through this," or, "the worst part is over; you'll see The soon," or "you should do X, Y, or Z." I don't want "fixes"; I want to be HEARD. And, having heard me, I want my listeners to support me, not judge me.

[Out There]

Perhaps you need to comfort Little Cool because she's hurt and remembering things ? Ask her what she wants and needs. Only being our rational adult selves doesn't entirely work with how a child feels. I'm sorry you're missing your T. Safe hugs if wanted.

[rainbow8]

I hear you!

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I hear you!

There she is!

Originally Posted by coolibrarian

I'm trying to forget about how much I miss my T, how angry I am at her, how much Little Cool feels abandoned, and anxiety.Why am I trying to forget? Because when I remember, I get very angry, and, having no one to vent the rage on, my anger turns inward and I become depressed. When I want to really vent my rage, I don't want to be told "you're strong, you'll get through this," or, "the worst part is over; you'll see The soon," or "you should do X, Y, or Z." I don't want "fixes"; I want to be HEARD. And, having heard me, I want my listeners to support me, not judge me.

Posts, like this remind of just how ****ing painful the first few breaks were.
I'd journal and journal.
I'd see T's image in my mind and feel I was going to explode.
I could never, ever envision a time not like that. Hurt and anger and longing had been my entire life.

Of course then I fantasised about not going back to therapy to show her just how much it hurt.
Is not mine that now.
That intense pain.
Something inside me Git enough over the years from her.
I feel secure when apart from her.

Yes, I think aboyt her. Not as much as I thought I would.
But it's not painful.

[SalingerEsme]

Originally Posted by unaluna

There she is!

Rainbow!!!!! I am so glad to see you

[sarahsweets]

Because I am new here I am going to assume that 'T' means trauma? If it does than healing is its own pain. Everyone thinks that to heal means all better no more boo-boos but they know nothing. Healing is its own journey with its own pain. Yes you have to slog through that pain to get to the other side but lets not invalidate it by telling someone the worst is over or "you'll get through it". Unless I am wrong and we are not talking about trauma.

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

Because I am new here I am going to assume that 'T' means trauma? If it does than healing is its own pain. Everyone thinks that to heal means all better no more boo-boos but they know nothing. Healing is its own journey with its own pain. Yes you have to slog through that pain to get to the other side but lets not invalidate it by telling someone the worst is over or "you'll get through it". Unless I am wrong and we are not talking about trauma.

T on here means therapist.

[SlumberKitty]

I hear you. I'm sorry you are going through this. Kit.