So angry right now

While what your professor is doing is perhaps okay with his licensing board, it might not be okay with his department or the university. The other chick provided him probably good cautionary advice. All it takes is one wrong step, one complaint, and his position could be in jeopardy. She wasn't wrong in advising him caution in this dual relationship.

Many professional codes about ethics include a form of whistleblowing, which means there is an ethical duty to report wrongdoing you know about or suspect. But the freudians would have a field day about a "general and vague comment" that revealed potentially confidential information that could be so easily found out. Some of this is probably the small community phenomenon and I think the most important person-- you-- are okay with the dual relationship, but I also don't think the other prof is wrong to at least question it. Personally I would report it to the board or ethics committee and skip the meeting and confrontation with a colleague, but everybody has their own way of handling it. My H was a professor and I know he could get very protective of students when they were being mistreated by other faculty and told him, so it's likely that she may simply have a misplaced sense of assistance. Or a rescue complex.

Yeah in this day of #metoo etc., a "general and vague comment" from a female student to a female prof about a male prof, let alone a priest, could be taken as a cry for help.

I think the issue here is the dual relationship more than anything. All kindsa therapeutic carp is probably being reenacted in the classroom, as it often is anyway.

I think the issue here is the dual relationship more than anything. All kindsa therapeutic carp is probably being reenacted in the classroom, as it often is anyway.[/QUOTE]

Yes like (subconsiously) getting him into potential trouble for the initial 'bad' grade? Just don't take his classes? Seems an easier solution.

“this other chick needs to calm down!”
Is this a wind up?

He fully admitted to the entire class today that he screwed up our grades last semester and is in the process of fixing them all. We’ve sorted out our issues and both admitted we said some things we shouldn’t have and believe that going forward things will be even better between us.

It’s not a perfect relationship. We’re both human. We both make mistakes. I’m in therapy for a reason. But at least I have a therapist who is willing to work through the issues with me and not leave me over them. That in itself speaks volumes.

It's a sad commentary on the profession that therapists are lauded for not abandoning clients. And I do not mean that as a dig, it's just an observation.

I don't understand...why would a therapist abandon a client when there is no reason? Or maybe I'm misunderstanding your statement.

I said that in response to you saying it "speaks volumes" that he is willing to work through the issues with you. I guess I don't think it means anything other than that he isn't so unethical as to maliciously terminate you out of anger over the whole grade debacle. In other words, working through issues that come up in therapy is part of a therapist's job, imo.

Oh ok. That makes sense. I have huge fears of abandonment and I’m not always an easy client, so I appreciate every time he doesn’t fire me when I think he should.

But you say he will fire you if your condition becomes serious enough that you attempt suicide. Working with a suicidal client would be pretty part and parcel of the therapist's duties.

His practice is very small - he only sees a couple client a at a time and he sees them in his office at the university. He doesn’t have the resources to handle suicidal patients. He made that clear to me when I started and actually gave me a second chance after I did attempt last year. It is very, very common where I am for a therapist to refuse to work with someone who is suicidal. When he went away for four months I could not find anyone to take me because I’d had a recent attempt.

He is actually being responsible by not taking suicidal clients, because he does not have the resources to deal with them. Most of his very small practice is actually marriage counselling.

AFAIK, if there is an attempt, it becomes a matter for the courts? Like you may have court-mandated therapy, and it wont be with the one you were seeing when you attempted.

I’ve never run into that. My therapists and psychiatrists continued to work with me through crisis. It never became a matter of the court.

I was admitted to the hospital and when I was released a week later they said they had no resources for me and I was on my own. Thankfully my therapist gave me a second chance or I would have been screwed. The courts only get involved here if a criminal act was involved.

My t is pretty laid back when it comes to dual relationships. We live in a small area where people know each other everywhere you go. So, t and I have a dual relationship. We handle it well and are able to talk through things. However, the one place he was pretty firm about was actually a college class. When he found out that I need to take a class that he teaches he asked me to take it with the the professor who teaches the course. I actually never thought about taking it with him because I love the other professor who teaches the class. I found it interesting that hard and fast no when it came to me taking his class. Perhaps more consideration should be placed OP one whether or not this is best for your client/t relationship.