[coolibrarian]

So, I was doing all right, but decided to email my daughter a suggestion, and she got all bent out of shape and is now mad at me (She accused me of parenting her child, and resents me trying to parent her child, instead of her, as if I was saying she is an incompetent parent. Normally, this is something I would bring to T, BUT I CAN'T and it's JUST NOT FAIR! Again and again, my anger rises, with no where to put it.

So I wrote to my daughter saying that I think she's an awesome parent, despite poor role modeling from her own parents (that is, from me, and her father).

Oh, and now I just got an email from my daughter, thanking me for saying what I said. She said she never expected it and really appreciates it.

All these ups and downs happening ALL. THE. TIME.

I STILL want to talk to my therapist, and not the brief telephone check-ins she is currently offering. I'll go along on a sort of dull plateau, and then something happens and I GET ANGRY AGAIN. Unless I find a positive use for the anger, I will become depressed again. Yes, I recognize my patterns. But being able to see what you do, doesn't always mean you can change. I still need her help.

When T finally comes off medical leave, I'll need more than one session in which to process/work through all the negative feelings I've had to deal with.

If anything else (negative) happens today, I'll probably consider phoning my Pdoc. Right now, I feel like crying.

[SlumberKitty]

Coolibrarian

[Out There]

Hugs. There is a big positive there among the negatives , so maybe try to hold onto that. It's very easy just to see the negatives , but there is always a balance in all the ups and downs happening all the time.

[seeker33]

I admire you for apologizing to her. Most people wouldn't do that. This might be a wonderful opportunity to improve your relationship.

[coolibrarian]

Originally Posted by seeker33

I admire you for apologizing to her. Most people wouldn't do that. This might be a wonderful opportunity to improve your relationship.

Thank you. We have had a complicated relationship, the details of which I will not go into, here. But I've spent the last few years working on it, sharing honestly with her, and she with me (even though sometimes, it hurt like HELL!).

[ArtleyWilkins]

Honestly, it sounds like you and your daughter communicated and worked through a small conflict. That’s a positive. Life has ups and downs and as long as you work through them that’s a victory. Doesn’t mean it isn’t stressful. Parenting, even our adult children, is stressful. But you did well and hopefully can see the positive in this interaction.

[nottrustin]

Sounds like you were able to turn a negative situation into a positive. I am happy for you.

I tend to use a lot of metaphors when I struggle to tell Ts how I am doing. The description I use to describe to them when I am in situations like you seem to be is: my Paul of whatever is full is and spilling over. Through coping skill, talking to other people or T I am able to empty out a bit of water so it isn't boiling over. Unfortunately we are unable to empty most of it but enough that I can cope and doing okay. Then some else happens and because my pail was already so close to full it once again boils over.

It is painful..

Thinking about you Cool