[LostOnTheTrail]

Welcome to the couch, old and new! A place to hang out - sometimes you get immediate feedback, sometimes you don't.

Shouting, "Cool Whip" tends to bring others out from between the cushions if you're feeling lonely.

This is a chatty thread. All are welcome. We're kind of psychologically oriented, sometimes. We try to be supportive. At times we discuss what that means.

It’s a place to plop down on the couch when you come home from work or wherever, or wake up in the middle of the night, or check in at lunch, rant a bit or not, and be among friends.

We advise you not to drink or drug and text your therapist ("T") - we speak from experience.

Sometimes the thread moves fast and you might get overlooked; sometimes it moves slowly and all you hear are crickets. Sometimes you get hugged or thanked pages later. So if it's a bigger question, you might want to start a new thread.

Grab a cushion, a spot on the floor, or an armchair in the corner and make yourselves comfy!

[velcro003]

didn't realize i was on the 100th page, so here's my last post:

ugh, i can't even believe it. last july i got up the courage to ask my mom to write up an anthology of sorts of my childhood, since i don't remember anything from 3-11/12ish or so. this took a LOT for me to do, but it bothered me enough to risk being vulnerable with my mother.

she said it'd probably be hard, but she'd do it. i checked in a couple of months later and she said some of it was difficult, but she found it rewarding too. she was having her ex-partner ask her questions, and that helped. she said she didn't want to get anything wrong, but i assured her it doesn't need to be perfect.

when i originally asked her, i remember saying things like "what was my birth like? (i was an extreme preemie), how was i as a baby, etc..." i don't remember the entire conversation as it was last summer, but i feel like i was pretty clear in what i asked for.

it was supposed to be a christmas present, that turned into a bday present, and i got it today. it is a pre-written journal ALL ABOUT HER CHILDHOOD. The journal asks questions about her childhood, and she answers them. All one million pages of this stupid effing thing.

i truly can't believe it, and how did she get it so wrong? i will never tell her any of this, i will just thank her. i am so upset, and already had a really bad day/week.

[SlumberKitty]

Thanks LostOnTheTrail for the new couch!!

[SlumberKitty]

HUGS Velcro, I'm sorry, that really sucks!!

Thanks for the new couch!!

[unaluna]

Oh, velcro. This is probably too soon, but maybe you can ask her to write more family biographies, since she did such a great job on this first one

[velcro003]

@susannahsays in response to this from the other thread: I'm also sad that you even have to ask what you were like as a baby. Is there anyone besides your mom who would know?

my dad would be the next logical answer, but his memory is probably worse than mine, and whenever i do bring up my lack of memories he always says " you were such a happy child with a smile that could light up the room," which is very sweet of him, but doesn't tell me much.

[velcro003]

Originally Posted by unaluna

Oh, velcro. This is probably too soon, but maybe you can ask her to write more family biographies, since she did such a great job on this first one

yeah, i;m never talking about this again to her.

Saw T today. She said that she did tell me her bond with the clinic is ending in March, but I don't remember. So she told me again. She said tentatively she might leave in August or September. If she enters private practice, she says patients can follow her. She says she won't leave abruptly, but will try to give all patients some notice.

[88Butterfly88]

Thank you for the new couch @LostOnTheTrail.

Pillows for everyone.



Hugs to all who want.

[ElectricManatee]

Velcro, if I remember correctly, you have said that you didn't think there was anything in your childhood to explain why you feel the way you do now. But a mother who misses the mark that badly on a lovely, straightforward request from you suggests that you likely do have some childhood wounds, even if you can't remember the specifics of what happened.

I don't have to ask, because my mom still won't stop talking about what a horrible baby I was.

[Elio]

Originally Posted by QuietMind

Saw T today. She said that she did tell me her bond with the clinic is ending in March, but I don't remember. So she told me again. She said tentatively she might leave in August or September. If she enters private practice, she says patients can follow her. She says she won't leave abruptly, but will try to give all patients some notice.

Will you be able to follow her? Perhaps you'll be able to see her more often?

Originally Posted by Elio

Will you be able to follow her? Perhaps you'll be able to see her more often?

Maybe, if I can afford her rates if she does go into private practice, and doesn't load herself with a heavy caseload. Private practice rates tend to be $200 - $300+ for clinical psychologists. I currently pay $75 at the public health clinic. I'd make it work somehow.

If she does enter private practice and offer Saturday or evening (7pm onwards) appointments, I won't have to declare my psychiatric conditions at jobs. I currently have to in order to get time off during the workday to see her.

Originally Posted by velcro003

didn't realize i was on the 100th page, so here's my last post:


ugh, i can't even believe it. last july i got up the courage to ask my mom to write up an anthology of sorts of my childhood, since i don't remember anything from 3-11/12ish or so. this took a LOT for me to do, but it bothered me enough to risk being vulnerable with my mother.


she said it'd probably be hard, but she'd do it. i checked in a couple of months later and she said some of it was difficult, but she found it rewarding too. she was having her ex-partner ask her questions, and that helped. she said she didn't want to get anything wrong, but i assured her it doesn't need to be perfect.


when i originally asked her, i remember saying things like "what was my birth like? (i was an extreme preemie), how was i as a baby, etc..." i don't remember the entire conversation as it was last summer, but i feel like i was pretty clear in what i asked for.


it was supposed to be a christmas present, that turned into a bday present, and i got it today. it is a pre-written journal ALL ABOUT HER CHILDHOOD. The journal asks questions about her childhood, and she answers them. All one million pages of this stupid effing thing.


i truly can't believe it, and how did she get it so wrong? i will never tell her any of this, i will just thank her. i am so upset, and already had a really bad day/week.

Hugs. I'm so sorry your mum is frankly narcissistic.

[velcro003]

Originally Posted by ElectricManatee

Velcro, if I remember correctly, you have said that you didn't think there was anything in your childhood to explain why you feel the way you do now. But a mother who misses the mark that badly on a lovely, straightforward request from you suggests that you likely do have some childhood wounds, even if you can't remember the specifics of what happened.

I don't have to ask, because my mom still won't stop talking about what a horrible baby I was.

i honestly don’t know what to make of this whole thing. it is bizarre and i HATE that i even held out a smidgen of hope that this would help in remembering my childhood.

[WarmFuzzySocks]

I finished a book last night, so now I am trying to decide what to read next. My bedside shelf to-read stack keeps getting taller. I decided that my biggest problem is that no matter how many books I read I will never read All The Books.

It's not actually my biggest problem, not by a long shot. But for tonight, I'm pretending it is. It's a good problem to have.

[Echos Myron redux]

In honour of the Oxford comma

[LostOnTheTrail]

Brilliant, Echoes...my favourite punctuation mark.

[Lemoncake]

Thanks for the new couch @LostOnTheTrail

Wooop! I did it!

[Lemoncake]

The monday I came back my flight was delayed by 4 hours. I filled a claim for "compensation" which I thought would be rejected, but it was accepted!

[Lemoncake]

The couch title just makes me automatically think of the University. Second shirts.

[Lemoncake]

Originally Posted by ElectricManatee

I don't have to ask, because my mom still won't stop talking about what a horrible baby I was.

No child or baby is ever bad or horrible.

[Echos Myron redux]

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

The couch title just makes me automatically think of the University. Second shirts.

What does it say about me that I just thought of punctuation

[Lemoncake]

Originally Posted by Echos Myron redux

What does it say about me that I just thought of punctuation

You lurrrrrrrrve your punctuation, and that's a good thing too!



I had to google what a oxford comma was :

a comma used after the penultimate item in a list of three or more items, before ‘and’ or ‘or’ (e.g. an Italian painter, sculptor, and architect ).

[LostOnTheTrail]

The Critic is being a ****, half an hour before session has even begun.