Couch 191: The Lazy Caterer Couch

Well I ended up missing the call which was weird because my phone didn't even ring so they ended up leaving a voicemail with more questions as to why I left my previous T. Either this clinic is going to be really good and I won't be good enough to get in or it's going to be the same same old just with lots of hoops to jump through. I did leave a message and try to explain, but I'm afraid I won't be good enough.

Lazy kitties:

Hugs @@ and Katy.

I think someone has tried to force our front door today. The handle has been broken.

Gosh my couch is old and beat up.

How scary!

Scary! No signs they got in, right? Like nothing missing? Might be good to make police report.

That's a lot of possibilities. When is the bloodwork and how soon will you have results? If it's too much iron, I think all you have to do with that is donate blood regularly (I just saw a House rerun with that). And copper, I think you balance it out with zinc maybe? I hope it's nothing serious...

One thing--Wouldn't they have seen liver cancer on the ultrasound?

The ultrasound would have shown liver cancer that affects its structure. But it wouldn’t show blood cancers that affect the liver, is my understanding, or cancers that have metastasized to the liver.

Can’t donate blood—spent too much time living in Greece during the mad cow years.

Going after work Monday since I don’t have to fast.

We called the police who said they are coming to do prints (it's already 9.30pm so they had better get on with it) but we spoke with a locksmith who said it could also be a fault with the mechanism of the lock. It's hard to tell. So it might not be. Wish I had cctv so we could look!

I hope the further testing tells them something more so you don't have to stay in this not-knowing purgatory. It is good to rule things out, but frustrating not to know what it is.

Has anyone done a graditude journal type thing? did it help?

stupid conversations #1456
other person: We should support local producers.
me: i agree, so why do you buy x brand milk
other: it uses milk from local cows
me: but its owned by [big French dairy producer] profits dont stay in our country
other: no its not....is it?
me: why do you think it has the French flag on the label?
other: *silence* i just assumed....

I LOVE Ricky Gervais's new series, "After Life"... it has a dog!

I recommend it, it has a therapist in it, although he's an ***, and it has a lot of comedy but there is some potentially triggering things for some....

i love that people want to support our nations economy but the reality is most companies are foreign owned and if we get rid of all the large multinationals like some suggest our country would be ****ed

going to check it out

Therapy today:

T rents out a therapy room in a practice made up of individual T’s and two receptionists for all of them.

She told me today the T that owns the entire practice is shutting everything down effective June, 2019. T (and everbody else!) will have to find new offices. Im not too upset by it; I’ll find her wherever she goes. I feel bad for her needing to locate a new office, pack up and move.

I don’t know why the boss is closing it up.

More new news:

It seems I’m having auditory hallucinations.. I have been hearing a deep bass tempo for months, probably more than a year. I didn’t think much of it. Thought my neighbors were just turning up their music while getting ready for work. It bothered my sleep but nothing major. Then I noticed it playing at 3:30am - all day. I stepped outside and listened but couldn’t tell where it was coming from. My daughter was over- she couldn’t hear it. I can feel the bass vibrating through the floor! I dismissed it all.

I was sitting in the waiting room to see T today and realized I could still hear that bass playing! It’s me!

It doesn’t sound like tinnitus. I can tell tinnitus sounds are in my ears....these bass sounds seem to come from elsewear. Weird.

T wants me to see my ENT. I’m hard of hearing in my left ear. T thinks I may have something she called ‘musical ear syndrome.’ She said it can happen when you’re hard of hearing and the brain is trying to fill that void. It will fill in the missing sounds with music people have heard in the past. She said it’s probably not mental illness.

The same bass sounds happens over and over. It doesn’t matter if my hearing aid is in or not.

Weird weird weird

Anyone know anything about this?

Hope you enjoy. It's only 6 episodes. It helped me feel a lot more "normal" about things I felt with the grief of my dog and things I'm feeling with grief over T

We get these Clery Act (federally mandated) alerts about crimes at my school. What bugs me is that even though they’re usually sent 5-7 days after the actual crime occurs, an arrest has never been made, not even when the victim knows who the perpetrator was. Which seems odd.

I have hearing loss and experience sounds that aren’t there, too, although mine are just random sounds, nothing recognizable as music.

Your auditory hallucinations are very classy!

When I want reassurance from T, she now reflects it back to me. Example: I tell her I don't know what I'm going to do without her, and her reply is that I need to have faith in my own abilities. Grrr. She's been doing this for a while now. I tell her that it feels like she's distancing herself, but she denies it. She says everything is the same. And that she's just having me challenge my thoughts because my other coping skills aren't working. I just want to be close to her right now before she leaves. She says that being closer to her won't change anything and I need to be okay with things not changing and staying the same. I'm so frustrated with her! And I only have 3 sessions left!!!

I am becoming quite attached to my walks. 4 miles today.

top lesson from ep 1 always carry a tin of dog food

No skinny dipping, then?