I overslept and missed my appointment

I overslept and missed my appointment this morning. I am absolutely heartbroken beyond words.

Oh no! Didn't you use an alarm? Maybe do that for next time, hopefully you don't get charged still

Let your T know if you haven’t already - maybe they can accommodate you later in the week.

I set the alarm and as backup, asked my brother and sister to make sure that I was up. I slept through the alarm and my brother only knocked once. I told them that they should have kept trying until I got up. I’ve had insomnia for the past two nights so my body was exhausted. I don’t usually sleep through an alarm unless I’m seriously sleep deprived due to my horrible insomnia. I feel so horrible about it.

They put me on the cancellation list.

I'm so sorry, hope.

I am so sad that I can’t stop crying. And my sister is making things worse with her comments. To understand, she doesn’t see the point of therapy so she would never go to therapy. When I was upset that I missed, she keeps saying things that basically say it’s no big deal and so that upset me. So then her next comment was that I care more about therapy than her. I told her that’s not true. I have frequently tried to explain to her why therapy is different than just talking to her. And when we talk about depression, she said she gets frustrated with me and why can’t love help and I told her that some of the things she says would bring more guilt back to a depressed person.

Both my brother and sister have many issues too but they refuse to try therapy but I at least wish they would support my treatment.

Maybe try to make appointments in the afternoon or something. Less likely to sleep through. Make sure you find out if they will still charge, many T's will without 24 hour notice

Hopefully you can get in later this week or early next week

I'm so sorry Hope! I hope that you can get in on the cancellation list! HUGS Kit

Sorry Hope. It seems like this has happened to you a couple times before. You might see if you can set your appointments a bit later in the day, particularly if you are having sleep issues. It's hard to make early appointments when you are dealing with insomnia.

Yes, perhaps be proactive about the appointments and make them later in the day.

Have you spoken to your therapist about the problem with your sister's inability to accept your therapy? Perhaps your therapist might have some ideas of how to approach this. What if you were to take your sister along sometime?

I just feel overwhelmed. I can’t even describe how hopeless and in despair I feel. My head is in a dark place.

HUGS Hope...HUGS gentle, calming hugs.

Thanks everyone.

I don’t know how to do the trigger warning but SUI has crossed my mind. I feel especially bad today because I was so close to feeling better this morning after my appointment but now I’m 2 weeks away and I’m suffering and falling apart.

Those SI feelings are a clue as to how hard it is for you when you miss your sessions. I think the comments about making your appointments for later in the day are good ones. But I understand that you are not in an emotional space to think about that right now because you are consumed with the emotional backlash of missing your appointment.

However bad it feels right now, this will pass. It has happened before and these feelings have been here before, and they have gone before. They will go again. You jhust have to get through them until you get to the other side.

You have missed quite a few appointments before because of sleeping through them. What's going on with that? It isn't just that you slept through your alarm and your brother didn't wake you up. What is it about missing appointments that helps you? There is a reason this happens (sleeping through the alarm is just a "cover" reason).. There is a pay off for you somewhere in here. Once you are feeling more settled within yourself it will probably be helpful to explore that more.
Hang in there. This won't last forever.

With this current T, I’ve never overslept for any of his appointments but I have overslept on my ex-T and ex-Pdoc. I’m just so tore up over this. And I rented the car for nothing. I feel like such a screw up.

I struggle with insomnia too, and how to take ambien without sleeping through things. This is just a crazy, practical suggestion from my years of working 100 hour weeks in a critical setting. It needs a "kinda gross" warning more than a trigger warning. When I was on duty call at night, I would keep the phone near my ear, and make a huge cup of coffee before bed that just sat right next to the phone. The minute it rang( or my alarm went off) I would drink down the whole cup of cold coffee or even espresso depending how tired I was. Once it hits your system, you just aren't going back to sleep.

Sleeping through things gives an immediate out-of-control feeling to life, with shame , apologies needed, and consequences I don't want, so that is my not-so-appealing solution. Cold coffee . Immediately. It works.

I have therapy this morning, so the minute my alarm went off, I drank down a big cup of coffee while snuggling with my dog. I am sometimes ambivalent about therapy or even nervous about going, so I can see how going back to sleep could act some of that out and then later lead to feeling devastated.

In a similar vein to SE, if I know I'm going to have trouble waking up, I drink an excessive amount of water right before bed. A full bladder is a big motivator to wake up.

Hi Hope. I am wondering what kind of practise your therapist has. Does she practise out of a clinic? Does she run one on her own? Does she run her sessions out of her home even? All this I see as affecting how this problems rolls out and the options for resolution.

But, first and foremost, regardless of how many people she does or does not work with, she should have provided you with emergency measures.

I am concerned about the dark thoughts. I've been there and it is both scary and agonising.

I want to remind you that your family physician is also a member of your mental healthcare team.

My psychiatrist was out of town. His office recommended I see my family doctor before making a decision to ultimately go to a hospital emergency. Seeing him really helped. Even the talk made me feel better. He prescribed a PRN until I could see my psychiatrist. All worked out in the end.