Couch 198: All the Countries Couch

Of course. I’ll post one a little later

My neighbours are coming into my yard and mowing again. I hate it they moved the old part of a cat tower where a bearded dragon lives luckily he is still there and they missed my butterfly vine. I don't know what to do now because the old guy is scared of his wife and let's her do whatever.

So my dad just figured out that I have BPD. Well, actually I just mentioned it in passing. Of course the only BPD stuff he knows is from tv, so he asked me if I've ever killed someone... umm, no dad. Then he says that he probably has it. Umm, duh. It's genetic so it's either him or my mom or both. And my younger sister has it. I can't believe he asked me if I was a murderer though! And if I ever "really" harmed myself.

My dog doesn’t look 80lbs in this picture. I’ll have to get a better one tomorrow when he playing in the yard.

I met with 2 different therapists for.my son's individual therapy. The first wasn't too horrible but he made it seem like he puts a time frame of 12-20 sessions in clients and he kept interrupting me and my son when we'd go to say something. I know the therapy isn't for me, but I like to have more open ended time frames and the interruptions seemed rude.
Then the 2nd I left feeling so triggered and it wasn't even my session! He wasn't a jerk but I guess he more works with families of younger kids instead of individually. He was very direct asking the dynamics of the family; is ther abuse or CPS involvement and I was trying to be truthful about that. He asked my son to step out and we talked about how often I go to therapy, how long I've been in therapy, my husband doing EMDR, past in home therapy. I felt like he thought it was a bad thing that I've been in therapy so long and how I want everyone to work on their own things with individual therapists. Not to dismiss everything but he didn't have any toys for a younger client to play or fidget with, and almost seemed like he prefers to do family therapy. He suggested in home therapy to work on issues, and kept us over by 20 minutes. I don't know why I'm so triggered by it, but I really am.

Thanks for the pic Jersey! What a sweet face!!

this week's prompts in my poetry class have me an absolute emotional mess the last couple days. but my two poem drafts are now done and submitted. margarita time.

Jersey he's so beautiful looks playful

I have decided that I am getting lengths of chain and padlocks so I can lock up when I go out. They said they wouldn't come in my yard and now they have so I think I need to reinforce boundaries.

on an up note, i did go swimming after work today. several laps of crawl stroke, in addition to breast stroke, i'm getting my mojo back.

The serious cooks on the Couch might know this. Is there a book vel sim. on the chemistry of cooking? I need to learn what sort of things to expect when I’m experimenting. Especially without gluten if that affects stuff.

FKM? WFS? SD? Anyone?

Ok, my T is going to think I have totally gone nutters on him. He wants to connect to me without me being hyper vigilant about social skills and without being submissive. I just sent him an email asking him to teach me about something/anything he is passionate about and knows a lot about... let’s hope he is willing to try!

No but he knows he looks like a movie star! He is a handsome boy!

Cooking or baking? And i would think so. I have heard tell of such things in my wanderings.

Eta - americas test kitchen has 2 volumes on GF that people rank high.

Best Book on Baking Science - Home Cooking - Chowhound

Science-Based Recipes | Cook's Illustrated

The Science Behind Baking

The Science of Good Cooking: Master 50 Simple Concepts to Enjoy a Lifetime of Success in the Kitchen (Cook's Illustrated Cookbooks): The Editors of America's Test Kitchen and Guy Crosby Ph.D: 8601200915013: Amazon.com: Books

My school has gotten everyone—students, staff, faculty—free digital access to the Wall Street Journal.

And now I can understand their articles better after an economics course.

You could also look into books by Alton Brown. His show always had a science bent to it.

Good plan!

Food Lab and Salt, Fat, Acid Heat are both pretty good.

I second Alton Brown as well. Apparently he puts on a pretty good show too, if you ever get a chance to go see him live.

Here's a therapy wardrobe oops:
I was at Target, found a super simple knit tank dress on clearance, threw it in the cart and went about shopping. How does this relate to therapy, you might ask? When I got in line at Target, all the lines but the one I was in were pretty long, and a familiar-looking gentleman walked by, looked at all of the lines and came back and got in line behind me.

It was the ex's therapist. We're both grownups, and I almost always run into someone I know at Target anyway, so I just smiled and said hi and went about my checkout, no biggie.

Today, we met with him, and when I arrived I realized I was wearing that same dress he'd seen me buy.
(For the record, I actually don't care. He probably wasn't paying that close attention anyway. It's just funny.)

The session utterly wore me out. I just wanted to pop onto the Couch to say hi , and now I am going to bed.

Thats one of my wanderings! I loooove that title!

I didn't do anything I promised myself I would do today but kept pushing stupid memories of exT away and trying squash the feelings of neediness away. I have realised I wanted my exT to be my mother maybe that's why I was so alarmed about 5 years ago when he asked if I saw him as a mother figure.

It's perfectly normal to crave human touch. Massages are my thing. If your not ready for that maybe you could try smaller like having a manicure or a pedicure done?

Sometimes things take longer to get done than we want.But they'll be done when they're done. I feel the maternal stuff with R too. It makes sense to want that nurturing and care aspect and I think that stands regardless of gender.

Pink elephant story time! ( I know I go on about this but there's actually a house near where i live that has a pink elephant in their front garden). Basically my theory is that the more you try not to think about the pink elephant the more you will think of the pink elephant. Rather than actively trying to resist- let those thoughts in. Write them down. What did you love about ex- T? I always poke fun at R's hair- did yours have weird quirks?

Did you find a new art class? Maybe you could find a new one, something similar like pottery or photography?

I've had OCD when I was a kid and it still pops up sometimes. I found audiobooks really help me get out of that headspace . There's so much free stuff on youtube! Sure you could find something. I have the power of Purpose by Les Brown playing. It's a 6 hour video.

No lies. But my brother's medical school (SGUL) gave his whole class ipad mini's. All we got was a tote bag, a skull poster and a notebook.