Couch 203: The Spam and Cool Whip Couch!

Healed hope they find what wrong with your doggo

Today i found 2 paintings i did for my exT so i wrote S is a liar on one and liar all over the other one i then tried to burn them but they dont burn so well so i got knife and cut them up and threw them away along with some of my mothers things and i feel better.

Hugs, Healed. I hope the vet can diagnose your dog without too much expense. Do they allow payment plans or anything like that?

What kind of book club is this? you can join my club.

I'm listening to the audiobook of James and the giant peach.

How soon does T usually get back to you? if he's not free straight away.

Better out than in as Shrek says.

I;m glad you're feeling a bit better.

He'll return my call within a few hours.

Couch, do you think this suggests my T is going to email me again later?

It doesn’t necessarily suggest to me that he will email you later-it just suggest that he will reflect on it.

Reflect to me would mean thinking about it, but R and I usually just have the one email exchange.

If he normally follows on from the original then he could email you again later.

We're you able to reach him?

How are doing now?

Not poking fun at gf but I loved this sentence.

I know you're doing you're best and well done on the 10 days so far! But I honestly think you need a much higher level of care and support then you are currently receiving.The gaps between your appointments are massive especially when your already struggling with so much.

There may be nothing you really can do but just having you in your sister's corner will be a huge source of comfort and support.

He may have felt trapped in that moment but I think SH is the risk you take when dealing with clients who need more support. In my head reading your original post the image of a little child just comes up in my head. Sometimes you just have no hope and you need someone to believe in you when you don't. I have two friends I always email a few days leading up to my exams.
They let me that it will be okay for every exam and I do the same for them.

I don't think it would have been much in that moment to give you that reassurance. You'll learn to run but only after you have the foundation of standing up first.

Legally you;re not a child anymore. and other people will see that too Could you leave a false trail and not tell them who you're really staying with?

I was getting carried away. GF can be pretty particular. Thats not cheap, was my point.

Donut Friday at work today! The guy who usually brings them isn't here today so the receptionist and I each chipped in and got the donuts. It's not Friday without Donuts.

I'm struggling a bit this morning. Not feeling as okay as I was yesterday. But that's okay. I'm not in crisis and that's the important thing. Definitely feels more like trying to keep my head above water today than it did yesterday. Maybe I can flip onto my back and float....

My best friend picking flowers for a wedding

Thanks, Lemon. I do think the asking for reassurance came from the child part of me. I've thought of all these things he could have said that could have helped, like even just a sentence or two. I know he's trying to keep me from being dependent on him, but I feel the time to do that is NOT when I'm feeling that bad. Get me through the crisis with some kind words, then talk about it later. Even if it's partly to say "Next time if you need something immediate, please try a crisis line."

I was in touch with a friend during some of this, and she was really supportive. She asked me later why her support wasn't enough, why I needed T's too. And I felt really bad about it. I said I thought it was the male authority figure thing, like hearing something from someone in that role hits me in a different place than does a friend. They're both important and helpful, it's just that particular night, I just wanted him to say something like...I don't even know, I just wanted caring, I think. And then, in the second email, it was like he was yelling at me, scolding me really (see: child part).

I had this thought for an analogy to share with him, but didn't. There's that whole thing where if you give a man a fish, he eats for a day. While if you teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime. It's like T is trying to teach me to fish, but letting me starve while I'm trying to learn.

Things don't feel quite real to me the last couple of days. I can't believe I've let talking to a lawyer throw me this much.

I would not think so -- it sounds to me like he's going to think about it some more on his own.

If that is the case, it is a cop out of actually responding to me, which is not good enough. I've already cancelled next session. If I doesn't email me again, I will assume me not coming back is cool with him.