[MoxieDoxie]

I have a part that wants the T to want me, to pursue me, to chase me, to yearn for me.

I have a part that wants the T to take care of me, adopt me to make me part of his family.

I have a part that wants the T to think I am skilled and talented that he refers my services and sings my praises to his friends, family and other clients.

I have a part that wants the T to just think I am great people wants wants me in is circle of friends.

I have a lot of wants that can not be full-filled ever. When I think of how they can not be full filled it feels like a hoard of people punching and kicking me.

They need to make crazy glue to glue back all the parts that have shattered off my core self.

[Lonelyinmyheart]

Oh my gosh, yes I relate to every word.

This words were true for me in the beginning.
I don't feel shattered anymore though.

T held all the pieces together until I had the stenght to do that.

[downandlonely]

@The mouse that is great that you had a T to put you back together.

[Amyjay]

They parts are all perfectly normal part of a human being, all trying to get the perfectly normal human needs of belonging, acceptance, safety, love and care met by whatever means available to them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with any of those yearnings for things that all human beings need and desire, or any of the parts that hold them.

[MoxieDoxie]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

They parts are all perfectly normal part of a human being, all trying to get the perfectly normal human needs of belonging, acceptance, safety, love and care met by whatever means available to them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with any of those yearnings for things that all human beings need and desire, or any of the parts that hold them.

It has always irked me when a therapist normalizes things I say. Feels the same when non-therapist do it. Maybe it is dismissive. Like when you say some days I do not feel like getting out of bed and they say everyone feels that way one time or another.

[Omers]

Hugs MoxiDoxi,
I can relate to the overall feel of what you are experiencing even if the specific needs are different right now. I hope with time you are able to have that fullness you are needing.

[Lonelyinmyheart]

Originally Posted by MoxieDoxie

It has always irked me when a therapist normalizes things I say. Feels the same when non-therapist do it. Maybe it is dismissive. Like when you say some days I do not feel like getting out of bed and they say everyone feels that way one time or another.

I'm like this as well. My ex T used to do it a lot. She had good intentions - I think she didn't want me to feel alone or abnormal in some way, but it had the effect of minimalizing what I was feeling or going through. Oh and one time I admitted I was having s thoughts and she told me many people feel like this at some time or other. This really annoyed me because I needed her to take me seriously.

Originally Posted by MoxieDoxie

It has always irked me when a therapist normalizes things I say. Feels the same when non-therapist do it. Maybe it is dismissive. Like when you say some days I do not feel like getting out of bed and they say everyone feels that way one time or another.

I think this kind of response is difficult and feels dismissive when we want to believe that our pain is peculiar and particular to us. It is hard to tolerate the idea that our pain is not unique and is quite ordinary when it feels crushing for us to live with it.

[mostlylurking]

Originally Posted by MoxieDoxie

It has always irked me when a therapist normalizes things I say. Feels the same when non-therapist do it. Maybe it is dismissive. Like when you say some days I do not feel like getting out of bed and they say everyone feels that way one time or another.

I know what you mean, that it can feel dismissive as if someone's saying it's an everyday commonplace thing, and no big deal. But I think usually what the person really means is "I hope you're not feeling embarrassed or ashamed about how you feel, because there's no reason to, these are normal, natural feelings." Personally, I rarely experience shame over my feelings, but I do know it's very common, and I do think the intent behind "it's normal" statements is a kind one. If that helps at all.

[MoxieDoxie]

I have a paper trail on here of my spiraling downward from my therapy. It is crazy when I read through everything I have written. It is clear as day I was going to crash and burn.