How would you handle this??

Right now I am handling the death of a family member who for complicated reasons triggers some of my trauma. Because of choices I made 8 years ago I am the sole decision make for this person. I am grateful for the opportunity to ensure she had the best life possible. Right now is excruciatingly hard but still worth it. When I had my appointment with T yesterday she was wonderful. She told me if I needed to chat to reach out to her. I did at 2:30 today.

T and I have always known that she is not the greatest at che king her business phone especially when she is enjoying family time (she has a husband and 4 year old child).

She texted me back at 8:00 saying she had been out doing family stuff all day and was exhausted. She was getting ready for bed but asked if we could talk at a specific time.

Since my biggest fear is being too nerdy and interrupting her life I said of course. However , because of all the time it had taken, I have buried all the emotions and am leary of dredging it back up. On the other hand I will still meet to make difficult decisions.

Would you tell her you are all set which is my instinct or follow through??

It never hurts to have more support. I'd probably talk to her.

I'd also probably talk to my T in the same situation. Maybe you can tell her something like that you buried the emotions, but that the underlying issue with the decisions is still there. It seems like a situation where it sounds good to talk things through with somebody.

I'd also probably still talk to her. Maybe say what you said here about not wanting to dredge up the emotions again, so you'd rather focus on the decisions. Or are you saying that just talking about the decisions would dredge up the emotions? In that case, I'm less sure...

The whole process yesterday was really emotional because it triggers childhood pain. Ii have decisions to make that I am stuck between doing the right thing and protecting myself from potential emotional harm from another family member.

In this situation, I would talk about the unavoidable practical thing I was facing (having to make the decision) and just mention that I was having a lot of feelings but I had put them away at the moment and didn't want to go there yet. That way you can both bookmark processing the emotions for after the immediate crisis is over.

Thank you all, we talked this morning. We discussed the decisions and why they were really hard doe me to make. We brainstormed ways that I could do what is the right thing while still protect myself. I know have q plan that I can feel about

I am glad you went through with it and T was able to help.