The adult part taking care of the child part

Oh dear. Well, I hope it works out! Also see my edit of the previous post - can you please somehow not be embarrassed to ask help from the guy whose bloody job is to help you? Yeah, I know ...

I just want to validate you that imagery doesn't work for everyone. You feeling like you're back there, re-experiencing it... is a sign that it's too much, you're out of your window of tolerance.

This AND your T expects your adult part to step in (How? You can't in that state!) and DOESN'T want to step in himself...I'm sorry, i strongly feel this can retraumatise you.

For me, I'm partly back there but can maintain a dual awareness, so it's not retraumatising. If I get too deep, my T steps in because getting lost in it by yourself is harmful!

(We do imagery because I can't do EMDR but in EMDR, that dual awareness is important too)

erase. wrong forum.

How did it go?

Slowly and I am still dealing with the same issues. Once a week session is not going to get this resolved quickly at all.

Thank goodness but he has not taken me back into any trauma memories as of yet. I think he is trying to build put the adult part. Either way I hate having to leave and it is agonizing waiting until the next week.

That sounds sensible on his part. Yeah, slow sucks but it's also good, I think. As much as I'd like to rush my own stuff, lol.

So I had a rupture with Betterhelp T because he go so busy I felt I was just a number in his book. This is how a therapist fixes a rupture.

So it is not so much the message frequency that is an issue but the content and quality of the messages. The messages have left you feeling like I am only considering you as a number in my book and not as a valuable person. If that is the case, it actually hurts me a bit that you feel that way. I want to be helpful to you but I am also just a person. I have my own limitations.

Absolutely, I would agree that with the crazy amount of activity in my life lately, I have been out of touch with my feelings. I have not really given myself time to be in them. I have just continued to move and it seems like you have felt the effects of this and I am sorry. And it makes sense now that you say it that you have internalized this change and perceived it as a slight against you. You have told me in the past that this is a tendency of yours though I did not take it into account and address it like I should have. That was a mistake that I made.

We are both card carrying members of the human race, and what comes with that title is imperfection. Relationships have their ups and downs and that goes for long term therapeutic ones as well. However, from my experience, relationships can grow when they make it through the downs. I am scared to promise something that I can't deliver. But I am willing to do what I need to do to make this arrangement work alongside all of this other craziness going on

What would have helped? What about something like "That sounds like an awful feeling, for you to feel like you are just a number in my book."?

No I am happy with his response. Just showing what it looks like when a therapist authentically tries to repair the therapeutic relationship.

I updated in my other post but I am updating that I ghosted my betterhelp T because he became useless and I was tired of the same protocol response of paraphrasing, validating and some stupid follow up question. It had not heart in it.

I am still crazy attached to Mr. T but I am surviving better between sessions I think because I have been finding a reason to email between sessions. Dear God I am so bad. Well we were getting the first vaccine the same week and he has some issues and I did not.

Now I have no reason to email him this week.....lets see if my manipulative part can figure out a way to get some kind of connection with him until session on Thursday.

I would be happy with this response. I was not happy with the response my therapist gave me.