[Merope]

I'm working on this piece of creative non-fiction that is turning out to be extremely relevant to the content of our sessions. I have shared writing with him before, but it was less than 2000 words....as it stands, this one will be under 20,000! I desperately want to send it to him as I think it will be beneficial. I've expressed things I would struggle to say out loud. It goes quite deeply into experiences and vulnerabilities that are hard to describe in a non-creative way. I wouldn't even know where to begin.

I'm just a bit conscious of it being long and time consuming to read. Does anyone have any advice on how I could approach this? I thought of just sending him the relevant bits, but they don't make sense when taken out of context. I guess I could say, "please don't feel like you have to read the whole thing, I realise it's quite long" etc and then just leave it up to him? But then would he assume I actually want him to read all of it and am being manipulative? I think I'm overthinking. I just don't want to come across as asking for too much of his time. I guess he could also read it in session, but I think that would feel a bit weird to me. I don't want to see his reaction as he reads it, it would make me want to hide. The last time I gave him something to read (after he encouraged me to), he simply took it and read it at home. He thanked me for sharing it with him and seemed genuinely intrigued. That was about a year ago and I haven't shared anything else since.

I guess maybe I should just send it and accept the possibility that he might not read it? Or say that it is too long? That would feel like rejection, but at the same time, not sending it at all doesn't seem like an option because it's so important to me.

Ahhhhh I don't know how to interact like a normal human being ffs. Why is this so hard?!

Many thanks in advance.

[LonesomeTonight]

Could you try asking him this in session maybe? I mean, saying you want to share something, but it's really long, and see what he says?

[CharlieStarDust]

I usually start session with giving my T something to read. At the beginning I'd bring in long texts and circular thoughts and post session, would email equally long emails. Over the years, I've managed to condense my thoughts into more concise and targeted writings. Can you maybe look at that option? Look for anything repetitive and overlapping and try to tighten it?

[Elio]

If you could financially afford it, how would it feel to offer to pay for a non-session so to say? Paying for his time with your thoughts without you being there. How long do you think it would take him to read it? Talk to him and see what options you might have. If I recall correctly, you are are not in the US so not sure if there's any limitations on him taking money from you without you being there. Here, if you are private paying and it is in service of your therapy, I don't believe there's any ethical issues to pay for him to read it.

Over the course of my therapy, my T has read well over 20,000. However, those have been in bites of probably no more than 4,000 at a time, with most being at about the 2,000 mark.

[Omers]

My T has a special rate for paperwork, court prepping and other office type stuff that is not the normal therapy. If I was going to as him to read a substantial piece I think I would ask if it could be billed under that rather than using session time.

[Lonelyinmyheart]

I've shared masses of writing with my T and she reads it in her own time without extra charge. I'm not sure if this is common though. A former T would read some stuff but always making clear that she'd only read it when she had time and not necessarily by the next session. Another T refused to read anything. It very much depends on the T. It would be absolutely fine to ask him what his policy is. I hope he is open to it because writing/creativity can say so much that talking can't.

[Lostislost]

I would just send it to him, I'm pretty sure he would read it..especially if he was intrigued by your writing before. I get really anxious about sharing anything I make with T as well, incase his response/lack of response hurts.

[Merope]

Thank you all. I think I will do my best to condense it as much as possible and ask him what his policy is when the time comes.