Couch 224: 2day, 2morrow, 4evah!

Hugs, Scarlet. I hope the accidental timing of my post wasn't upsetting. (I did not see yours before I posted mine.)

I dont know why i feel bad when i stand up for myself. After submitying a warranty claim for my couch mid December last year i have sometime rung to find out and emailed about the progress. Yesterday after getting a vague email about someone getting in touch with the supplier a few weeks ago i threatned to get intouch with the fair trading dept. i got an email back bout the the couch being in the assesment process. But i want to know why it has taken nearly 5 weeks not counting the period where factories close down between christmas and new year. Now i feel like a ***** for threatening to put in a complaint. I feel like i have done something wrong.

I had a choice of contact method by jury duty. I chose text. Its next month. 8:15 a.m.? Really? In this time zone?

I felt so bad i wrote another email ng i just wanted to know why it took so long when the original email said 5- 10 working days.

I had a dentist appointment at 7 am yesterday. 8:15 am seems luxuriously late.

What are you two - sun worshippers or something? I don't make any appointment before 10 am.
Jury duty is set but I think report time here is 9

The sun is an excellent natural source of Vitamin D.

With dentist appointments I just want to get them over with.

I like later day sun. I am a night person - I actually sleep better once the sun rises.

Ugh! I suffered so much today with it being the first week with only one session and today being the session that was missed. I told H when he came home from work that I was really struggling. He said I can go back to twice a week. That's great news! And I'm physically, mentally, and emotionally beaten up from struggling so much today. I feel like I was put through today for no reason. I feel like s***. I had 3 phone check-ins with L today. She told me to take my anxiety meds tonight. So I'm off to feed the dogs and go to bed. I'm glad today is over.

You were right to complain! I feel bad in situations like that too. I hope you get it sorted soon.

I think you were right to complain too. Besides I am 100% sure you did not say anything even approaching the message I responded to at work this past week - among other 'pleasantries' this person said that they hated us with the power of a thousand suns. That's some awful powerful hatred to be on the receiving end of, and I can't even imagine you thinking about writing something that mean.

I'm wide awake, woke up almost an hour ago because I felt compelled to do some writing that resulted from stuff we talked about in my session yesterday. Originally it was an email to L but I copied it to a word doc instead; for the first time probably ever in therapy it feels more important to hold this stuff inside myself and let it continue to work on me - kinda like if I share these realizations even with her it would somehow lessen their impact on me. If that makes any sense at all.

I'm glad I don't have to work today, I think I'll just stay up and go watch something on netflix maybe.

Ugh, I’m up too. Managed to sleep in ‘till 4:30 though, so that was something... and I start nights tmrw evening anyway, so there’s no reason to try to adhere to any particular sleep schedule.

T asked me yesterday to come up with some goals for therapy, which struck me as a bit odd. He said that since I’m doing so well he wants to make sure we are still actively working and putting our energy in the right place. I really don’t know what to say—my goals in therapy have always been, like, “stay safe” But I’ve been so stable for the last few months, likely because I’ve been in a new relationship, that these issues haven’t plagued me the way they used to.

Has anyone ever set goals for therapy? What sorts of things did you identify?

My therapy goals at the moment relate to self acceptance, emotional acceptance.

Learning how to feel within acceptable limits. (Never expressing emotion is not a good thing.)

"The power of a thousand suns"??? Wth, are they watching old godzilla movies or something? Thats an odd expression i havent heard in a looooong while!

Does anyone know if susannahsays is doing ok? I miss her contributions.

Hugs, Scarlet. I'm sorry you struggled so much today. But you did get through the day, so try to give yourself credit for that. I'm glad you'll be able to start seeing L twice a week again--I'm guessing your H saw the toll it took on you.

The only goal I had was to figure out the point of therapy. And those people put up wall after wall so that the client won't know.
I would just ignore such a question.

I had a client who talked like that once - ptsd from one of the many stupid wars the u.s. sent children to fight in - and he was sort of stuck in the 40's or so in terms of language he chose. He seemed more of an old gangster movie fan (to him they would not have been old) in his imagery.

While the bear Info gave me is ideal in some ways (very soft, 2+ feet tall) for replacing the animals...it also smells like therapist.

i know! i hadn't heard that in a long time either.


Thank you for the also powerful reminder that I need to always, always be conscious of where the other person may be coming from before I let myself react. Especially at work because medications and therefore medical conditions are involved. I have seen the need for this over and over everywhere of course in my emotionally-reactive life. Perhaps it is time for me to become an observer first, and then a chooser of my thoughts 2nd.

If that's a bad thing (in my case it would be a good thing) can you spray it with that febreze odor-eliminating fabric spray?

Ah therapy goals - there have been precious few actually written down, formal ones. Looking back, I wish we had done that more specifically. The times when I have gone in without even bringing my notebook intending to just completely wing it, she has clapped and said "yay".

We agreed on a goal last week though, which was decreasing session frequency (which came about after we worked with one of my dreams). I went again yesterday because I wanted to give myself a week to think/feel about it, and now that is starting. I go back on 2/19. We'll see how this one goes!

Right now I’m just going to use it as an informal completely unscientific covid test—if I can smell it I probably don’t have it.