Couch 237: Social Rules

stopdog · May 25, 2022 at 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

God almighty, no. If anything it makes me feel small and insignificant.

Are you in therapy again?

God no - never going to support therapists again by donating money to their do nothing charity. I was reading that awe means feeling part of something bigger than ones own self and I had never heard such a thing

SlumberKitty · May 25, 2022 at 03:38 PM

Anyone looking forward to Memorial Day Weekend? I have a very busy Saturday and Sunday with Church stuff, so I am looking forward to chilling on Monday. I think my Dad will barbecue hamburgers and my Mom will probably make a potato salad. I plan to veg out and watch a bunch of British Mysteries on Britbox.

LonesomeTonight · May 25, 2022 at 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Anyone looking forward to Memorial Day Weekend? I have a very busy Saturday and Sunday with Church stuff, so I am looking forward to chilling on Monday. I think my Dad will barbecue hamburgers and my Mom will probably make a potato salad. I plan to veg out and watch a bunch of British Mysteries on Britbox.

Sounds like fun! I'm not doing anything specifically Memorial Day-related, but I'm going to an (outdoor) concert Sunday night, so looking forward to that!

SlumberKitty · May 25, 2022 at 04:52 PM

The male to female ratio at my workplace heavily favors the males. So when we had dessert at 2 o'clock break, the three females (myself included) served the males. This is how it is every time. It's like we are stuck in these societal roles. I declined dessert and came back to my office after I was done serving, but I saw my female coworker cleaning up the mess after everyone was done. I don't know. Today I am just sort of over it. I don't know why everyone just can't serve themselves....potluck style.

Daffydungle · May 25, 2022 at 05:13 PM

Awe? Do you mean like double rainbow guy ?

SlumberKitty · May 25, 2022 at 05:27 PM

That was a pretty neat YouTube video Daffydungle.

SlumberKitty · May 25, 2022 at 05:28 PM

Something else that gives me an "awe" feeling is getting a picture from one of my sponsored kiddos who live in developing countries. I'm always so happy of what they are able to achieve even without having the advantages of being in a developed country like the US.

LonesomeTonight · May 25, 2022 at 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

The male to female ratio at my workplace heavily favors the males. So when we had dessert at 2 o'clock break, the three females (myself included) served the males. This is how it is every time. It's like we are stuck in these societal roles. I declined dessert and came back to my office after I was done serving, but I saw my female coworker cleaning up the mess after everyone was done. I don't know. Today I am just sort of over it. I don't know why everyone just can't serve themselves....potluck style.

Would the other two females agree to stop serving them maybe? Like you could sort of go on strike, in a sense, and let the men get it themselves? Or say, "OK, your turn to clean up!" That would frustrate me, too.

SlumberKitty · May 25, 2022 at 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Would the other two females agree to stop serving them maybe? Like you could sort of go on strike, in a sense, and let the men get it themselves? Or say, "OK, your turn to clean up!" That would frustrate me, too.

Yeah I don't know. The new woman coworker was not too thrilled about serving but the older woman that has worked here forever roped her in. I think she would be obstacle to that plan. But I think maybe next month, I'm just going to announce when we do our monthly meal, that it's everyone serve yourselves, and see what happens. Hope the best maybe.

ArtieTheSequal · May 25, 2022 at 05:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Anyone looking forward to Memorial Day Weekend? I have a very busy Saturday and Sunday with Church stuff, so I am looking forward to chilling on Monday. I think my Dad will barbecue hamburgers and my Mom will probably make a potato salad. I plan to veg out and watch a bunch of British Mysteries on Britbox.

I hope you have a relaxing holiday! I'm off on Monday for the holiday too, but I still have to work Sunday. I'd have taken Sunday off except I needed to be off today to go with H to his cardiologist appt.

ArtieTheSequal · May 25, 2022 at 05:41 PM

H's cardiologist followup was today. He had a bunch of tests done recently because his dr found irregular heartbeats, I forget what she called it. The 24 hour monitor he wore showed something like 9,000 extra heartbeats or something. And the PET scan showed he has a 10% blockage so they're going to be scheduling him to put in a stent. I'm glad I went with him today so I could ask questions. I really like the cardiologist, he took his time with us and answered all of our questions.

LonesomeTonight · May 25, 2022 at 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieTheSequal

H's cardiologist followup was today. He had a bunch of tests done recently because his dr found irregular heartbeats, I forget what she called it. The 24 hour monitor he wore showed something like 9,000 extra heartbeats or something. And the PET scan showed he has a 10% blockage so they're going to be scheduling him to put in a stent. I'm glad I went with him today so I could ask questions. I really like the cardiologist, he took his time with us and answered all of our questions.

Hugs, Artie. That sounds scary! I'm glad he's seeing a doctor and getting it taken care of.

ArtieTheSequal · 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Hugs, Artie. That sounds scary! I'm glad he's seeing a doctor and getting it taken care of.

Thanks, LT. My dad had a couple of them years ago, and my uncle just had one put in recently, so I'm a little bit familiar with the procedure anyway, enough that it's not as scary as it would be if I didn't already know people who've had them put in. It also helps that the cardiologist was so patient with my questions and concerns today, I feel comfortable that I can call and ask to talk to him if I have more questions as the time gets closer.

MobiusPsyche · May 25, 2022 at 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

God no - never going to support therapists again by donating money to their do nothing charity. I was reading that awe means feeling part of something bigger than ones own self and I had never heard such a thing

I'm with ATAT on this one...awe often makes me realize how insignificant I am rather than making me feel connected to something bigger than myself. Or if it is a piece of art or music, I feel how puny my talents are (Although in a different area) compared to those of the artist or composer.

I think it depends on your worldview and perhaps your view of the Universe or God or a Creator. If you believe there is some force creating these beautiful sunsets, amazing landscapes, mountains, beaches, etc., then you might feel connection to that source.

If you believe it's erosion and tectonic plates...well, you can feel connected to the awe of nature in general (but without invoking a spirit such as Mother Nature). That is a very different experience. I strongly suspect you have the second sort of experience, SD.

Only a few pieces of art have ever had me in awe. One was the sculpture somewhere in a museuem in Rome of Daphne turning into a tree. (Apollo and Daphne, Bernini, Galleria Borghese.) For that work and for Mozart, I do feel a connection to the many people who have also viewed (or heard) and been moved by the work.

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LonesomeTonight · May 25, 2022 at 07:56 PM

Una, I mentioned you in my Dear T post. I think you would appreciate one of the reasons I thought Dr. T might have opted to do virtual at the last minute today.

RTerroni · May 25, 2022 at 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Sounds like fun! I'm not doing anything specifically Memorial Day-related, but I'm going to an (outdoor) concert Sunday night, so looking forward to that!

That's cool, except for my Disney World trip in 2018 (where I came home during Memorial Day weekend) I haven't done much during the holiday weekend for the last 18 years or so.

LonesomeTonight · 08:42 PM

Trigger warning for something very recently in the news, as you may figure out what I'm talking about:

Possible trigger:

There was something in the news that happened recently that I think I just need to block out in order to function. So many people are talking about it, but I just can't. Like, I'm avoiding any further coverage beyond what I initially read. Is that wrong? I need to be able to manage right now.

A friend even speculated it could be why Dr. T needed to work from home today, due to being upset by it. And it's like it never even occurred to me that could be the reason, but she said her therapist friend was really struggling with how to get through the day with clients and has read that other therapists were taking the day off because they couldn't manage. I'm wondering, too, if he thinks it's weird that I didn't even mention it. Of course, it may have nothing to do with why he's out, and he also knows that I use avoidance as a coping mechanism. He also knows that I read the news daily, so....

I'm not even sure what I'm asking here. Is avoidance OK for something like this? Like OK in the morally OK sense. Should I mention it to Dr. T Friday, like, "Yes, I'm aware of this, I don't want to talk about it because it won't help me to do so. I need to sort of pretend like it didn't happen"? Is it wrong to shield myself from some horrible things if it's what I need to do to manage?

Quietmind 2 · May 25, 2022 at 08:49 PM

I don't remember if I ever had a sense of awe, or a sense of oneness with anything. That's despite watching the Star Wars movie where a particular has a mabtra "I Am One With The Force, And The Force Is With Me."haha.

The vastness of the earth, this solar system, this galaxy, the universe... and how tiny and insignificant we all are etc induces terror and panic attacks for me, instead of awe.

Unless awe can also include terror, hmm. Since I do find those coloured photos of nebulae beautiful?

Quietmind 2 · May 25, 2022 at 08:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Update that Dr. T started off the session saying "It's not pandemic-related." I said my first thought had been "Do you have Covid?" He seemed like he didn't want to share what it actually was, so I didn't push on it.

What's interesting is that he said he'd wondered if I would have thought the change was due to our discussion Monday about the texts. Me: "Honestly, it didn't even occur to me that it might be the reason. I guess that's a good sign that I feel OK about our conversation Monday?" Dr. T: "I think so." Me: "Now if it had been Monday that you'd changed to virtual last minute, I might have felt differently."

Was a generally good session, felt a bit odd being virtual after a few months of in-person (in part because he was in his reading glasses), but it was OK.

Glad you had a decent session!

LonesomeTonight · May 25, 2022 at 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quietmind 2

Glad you had a decent session!

Thanks, QM! I just feel sort of sad right now that it was virtual. Like I missed out on something today.

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Couch 237: Social Rules

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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	May 25, 2022 at 03:38 PM #362 Anyone looking forward to Memorial Day Weekend? I have a very busy Saturday and Sunday with Church stuff, so I am looking forward to chilling on Monday. I think my Dad will barbecue hamburgers and my Mom will probably make a potato salad. I plan to veg out and watch a bunch of British Mysteries on Britbox. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA

Daffydungle Poohbah Member Since Apr 2020 Location: Nowhere Posts: 1,257 4 451 hugs given	May 25, 2022 at 05:13 PM #365 Awe? Do you mean like double rainbow guy ?

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	May 25, 2022 at 05:27 PM #366 That was a pretty neat YouTube video Daffydungle. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	May 25, 2022 at 05:28 PM #367 Something else that gives me an "awe" feeling is getting a picture from one of my sponsored kiddos who live in developing countries. I'm always so happy of what they are able to achieve even without having the advantages of being in a developed country like the US. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA

LonesomeTonight Always in This Twilight Member Since Feb 2015 Location: US Posts: 20,870 (SuperPoster!) 9 75.1k hugs given	May 25, 2022 at 07:56 PM #375 Una, I mentioned you in my Dear T post. I think you would appreciate one of the reasons I thought Dr. T might have opted to do virtual at the last minute today.