[annoyedgrunt84]

I reached out for therapy again so I'm waiting for a response but I'm looking for advice. I'm afraid that I won't really be able to tell him/her/them what is really wrong. I'm so used to hiding my true feelings and saying everything is fine not to be a bother. I'm afraid that even a therapist will be secretly judging me if I say some of the things that are bothering me or tell them some of my deepest secrets. Should I maybe write down a few things and send them to them before a first session? I just don't want to waste their and my time by chickening out.

[*Beth*]

I know what you mean about feeling like you're being secretly judged. Do remember that you can even bring that up with your therapist.

I think writing some stuff down and sending it in prior to your first session is a terrific idea. In my opinion, actually writing on paper and sending it to your new therapist is better than email.

[ScarletPimpernel]

When I was first being introduced to a interim therapist, I wrote an email stating my diagnoses, symptoms, struggles, needs, wants, and goals. Well he offered L to work with me. L read my email and said she instantly knew she wanted to work with me. During our first session, I gave her a timeline of all my mental health events. That helped her a lot too.

Anyways, I would highly recommend writing out important things you want your potential T to know and giving it to them in advance. Just get it out of the way. I am not saying tell them your secrets. Wait until you've developed a relationship for that, imho. But everything else, let them know. If they can't accept you after that, good riddance. But if they do, you can start working on your issues right from the start.

[Rive.]

This is the time to experiment with this new T. If they judge you, then they are not the T for you. You then search for a more compassionate one.

It's actually better to know earlier, so you can cut your losses early on.