[Mountaindewed]

And I'm just kinda bothered by it now for some reason. She was a trans women in her mid 50's. I'm a trans guy who was 28 at the time. She would call me handsome a lot and just smile and stare at me in a way that made me very uncomfortable. She would be like "wow, you sure are handsome". She also would ask me really weird questions like what I "fantasized" about and stuff like that. I eventually ditched her when things got to be too much.

But how do I deal with these thoughts and feelings over 2 years later besides just moving on? And why is it just now bothering me?

[AnaWhitney]

I have no ideas but curious about what made it come up? Or is it something you thought about a lot already and the feelings are new ?

[Mountaindewed]

This happens a lot to me for some reason. Where I can't see that this might have been a legit issue until a long time later. I guess its also because I read a book recently where a trans man had a similar expierence. Which brought up the memories again. I often just brush off stuff like this but I think it sometimes bothers me more then I realize.

[Discombobulated]

Did you discuss with another therapist?

Honestly I would’ve been uncomfortable too with someone commenting so overtly about my appearance.

[Mountaindewed]

I've mentioned it a couple times but those therapists weren't much better. I plan on talking about it tommorow with my current therapist who I really trust. I talked with my mom about it today and my mom says it sounds like my therapist was trying to come onto me or groom me or something.

[Discombobulated]

She certainly sounds like she wasn’t behaving professionally from what you write. Good idea to discuss it.

[mote.of.soul]

Hey Mountaindewed,

Maybe it all depends on the context and on the things you guys were talking about at the time for it to make better sense? I mean I completely respect your thoughts and feelings about what was said, fully. For me though, looking at it from different angles, what was said could also have been within the context of your client/therapist relationship too and really quite neutral or even intending to be helpful - it all depends. I just wanted to put that out there and I hope you're going oka.y with your health issues and within your life in general 🙏

[Mountaindewed]

My therapist and I talked about all this today. She mentioned a lot of what mote.of.soul talked about. My therapist said according to all her therapy textbooks it was considered harrasment and what I felt was the most important thing. Shes glad I got away from her though before it possibly escalated.