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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
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Posts: 34,983
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#161
I have no problem with insisting a picture be taken with everyone looking nice and smiling. Children should learn that the world does not revolve around their emotional state - they don't have to like it but they still have to do it for the greater good. I hated dressing up for pictures or really anything at all as a child (actually I still do) but I have to for some things whether I like it or not if I want certain things (I have to dress more formally for court for example - otherwise a judge could say I had to leave the courtroom -which is not good for the career if one wants to practice the sort of law I practiced -as an example)
We don't have enough of that anymore from what I see of children running amuck over parents and parents who don't have the guts or the attention span to actually be the adult in the room __________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Last edited by stopdog; Aug 20, 2024 at 08:39 PM.. |
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Writing my way through...
Member Since Feb 2020
Location: In the desert of my soul
Posts: 7,503
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#162
the problem with the fake smiles for christmas pictures was that anything that was public-facing had to be fake smiles. pretend niceness every sunday in church and stuff. no one believed us and insisted we were the perfect family. and i grew up thinking God only lived in church, i'd sometimes sneak out of sunday school early and go into the church service cuz I knew he was there. always wondered why he never came home with us.
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Writing my way through...
Member Since Feb 2020
Location: In the desert of my soul
Posts: 7,503
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#163
Possible trigger:
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 34,983
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#164
We had a public family persona as well. I guess it didn't bother me - I don't remember as something that bothered me. I probably thought everyone did.
I was forced to go to a church as a child but I never wanted the god to come to my home - that would have been awful to me. Church/religion/the stations of the cross and so on and the stories they told scared the bejeesus out of me. As I got a bit older I found it all very illogical (I was kicked out of sunday school at 10 for pointing out some logic flaws - I was happy about it but my mother had the vapors for a bit). I remember when I was in a religious primary school - being terrified some religious figure would appear to me like at Lourdes or I would get the stigmata or something. I finally got to stop going in high school and haven't been back since except for funerals and a couple of weddings. __________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Last edited by stopdog; Aug 20, 2024 at 10:57 PM.. |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Nov 2013
Location: US
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#165
In my family, we had to look perfect. My mom owned a preschool. What would they think if they knew she didn't care for her own kids. I think that was one of the reasons for her neglect: she was too busy raising other people's kids that she didn't have the time for us. There are more reasons too (family dynamics, temperaments, etc.). But yeah. We had to put on a pretty face in front of everyone. I guess that's also why when I started struggling with my mental health openly, I was quickly shamed, shunned, and silenced.
__________________ "Odium became your opium..." ~Epica |
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,582
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#166
Okay started back exercising today after a 2-week hiatus.
Things gone right / things gone wrong: 1. Next time take it easier during heatwaves. 2. Build up time more slowly. 3. Good that my time off was actually a countable amount! |
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Magnet
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: in the garden
Posts: 2,342
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#167
Quote:
That's such a good question. I tell myself "Rest is productive" to remind myself that it is just as important as *doing* or what is traditionally thought of as productive. Otherwise the rest part just gets shuffled off to the side because I don't prioritize it or think of it as important. I hadn't really thought about the rest-productivity idea from the perspective of what actually is rest. Now I am pondering. I think my "rest" list is closer to your "disengagement" list- anything that allows me to recharge without demanding a lot of energy. I am way overthinking now, my natural way of thinking, of course. I just thought, well sometimes rest is resting my body- I'm sitting or lying down but I might be reading or writing in my journal or working on a puzzle or staring out the window at the hummingbirds or surfing the webs. Sometimes it's resting my mind- I might go for a meander (but not a brisk walk or a hike! Heh) or go putter in my garden and look at the pretty flowers and eat the tomatoes. I had the afternoon off yesterday and ended up picking up the youngest of the spawn and going to the river and standing with my toes in the water- but we had to walk to get there. Hmm. Rest or not? I sure felt satisfied and relaxed when I was done. I dunno. I started calling rest times "slow time" because it feels like a good way to describe meeting the need to not go-and-do all the time, and it helps me to be more satisfyingly productive in the long run. __________________ Since you cannot do good to all, you are to pay special attention to those who, by accidents of time, or place, or circumstance, are brought into closer connection with you. (St. Augustine) |
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,239
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#168
Couch Workout Club day 21 (yesterday)
Don't know where I found the motivation, but I did my seated boxing workout and two sets of core exercises. I'm playing with the idea that moving your body can also move your feelings. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,239
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#169
Couch Workout Club day 22
Logged over 6,000 steps throughout the day, including a walk around a local garden and a supermarket. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
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#170
Workout done also
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Writing my way through...
Member Since Feb 2020
Location: In the desert of my soul
Posts: 7,503
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#171
I'm barely at 2,000 steps today. As soon as it cools down some, I'm going for a walk around the block.
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Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: NJ
Posts: 1,326
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#172
It’s cooled down in my area significantly this week. Next week we are back to heat. I’ve been taking advantage of the cooler temps this week and opened all my windows to let this place air out before I have to put the air back on in a day or two.
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
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#173
The temp is dropping here -but more importantly the humidity is lower. I think the temps are going back up this weekend
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
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Magnet
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: in the garden
Posts: 2,342
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#174
Ditto here. A nice cool week with a little rain, even, which was nice for the thirsty forest. Temps are going back here too, which will be good for the garden. I've got lots of tomatoes ripening.
I ate fresh homegrown tomatoes and cucumbers with mozzarella for dinner tonight. __________________ Since you cannot do good to all, you are to pay special attention to those who, by accidents of time, or place, or circumstance, are brought into closer connection with you. (St. Augustine) |
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,239
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#175
Couch Workout Club day 23
Three sets of core workout exercises. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
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#176
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Writing my way through...
Member Since Feb 2020
Location: In the desert of my soul
Posts: 7,503
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#177
It is raining here, again today. So much for a dry 2024 monsoon that had been predicted! it's rained quite a bit already. I love the rain though, it cools things down and listening to it is soothing.
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,239
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#178
Morning, Couch.
So, this is it - hospital follow up day. I've done three sets of my core workout exercises, and I'm trying not to be attached to any particular outcome. If anyone is around, pocket riders would be really appreciated. Thanks, Lost __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,239
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#179
Relieved to have some good news at my hospital appointment.
It wouldn't necessarily have been bad news, just more frustrating for longer. As it is, things seem to be heading in the right direction. TW for weight talk.
Possible trigger:
__________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin Last edited by LostOnTheTrail; Aug 23, 2024 at 07:46 AM.. |
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
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#180
Uncle Martin (Ray Walston) is on Murder She Wrote right now! Love my Uncle Martin!
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