[krazibean]

i'm totally freaking out. has this happened to anyone? how much time do they usually take off? i'm happy for her but um...kinda jealous in a way? not because shes pregnant and i'm not, but because she is going to have someone to love way more than she can love me. she told me on the phone very matter-of-fact and i said congratulations, but i'm having some reactions here i don't know how to handle. also is her pregnancy going to interrupt her work/ability to concentrate? oh geeze, i'm freaking out.

[mountaindew24]

When started seeing my T 3 half yrs ago she 5 months and when she had the baby she was off 3 and a half months

[Mouse_]

Yes I'd find that way to much reality in one go! I don't think theres any simple way around this situation but to work through it and learn to trust that T can be genuine with you as much as with everyone else in her life.

hi krazibean,

she had to know it would be hard for you to hear that, so it's too bad it happened on the phone and not in person. it's definitely a tough situation because i'm sure you do feel happy for her, but it also does effect you that she'll be taking time off and i'm sure you feel that, too. when my t told me she'd be out for a couple of months, she seemed to know that it might be hard for me and was prepared. she had a referral lined up if i wanted to see someone while she was away and said i can email her during that time, too. for now that seems to be ok with me, though of course i might feel differently as it gets closer. anyway, i hope you can discuss this with your t further. i think what you're feeling is totally to be expected and hopefully she can provide something to help you find a way to handle it.

[Dinah]

My son's therapist started seeing a few clients on a very limited basis just three weeks or so after the baby was born. Certainly not full time. He doesn't see her that often anyway, so he barely noticed.

But my recollection of my postpartum days was that it wasn't altogether bad to throw on something not covered with spitup and spend a few hours at the office while grandma and grandpa bounced the baby and cooed at him. Not a long time of course. Not a full day. But a bit of time. If she has a family member to trade off with, it might not be a very long time. If she needs to arrange formal day care, it will probably be longer.

I'm not sure my therapist would have the nerve to tell me if he had a baby though. He knows how jealous I am of the infants in his life. I'd totally freak out.

[MissCharlotte]

((Krazibean))

Pregnancy leave is an individual decision. How much time your T will take off can only be answered by her. I think you should go ahead and tell her your worries. They are valid concerns and I don't blame you a bit for being jealous. But I bet T will still care for and love you just the same as she does now.

As for her pregnancy affecting her ability to concentrate, I don't think that will be the case. I worked through all three of my pregnancies and didn't notice any difference in this area.

Don't worry, but do speak with T about this, so you can prepare for any time off she may take.

Peace

Ask her her plans for maternity leave. It differs for everyone. How far along is she? She may not even know her plans yet! But voice your concern. I hope she can provide you a comforting answer.