T is away until September 2nd...

...and I didn't know that until our session today-- which is our last session because he is leaving tomorrow.

There was definitely a neglect of processing, some of it on my part, and some of it on his.

I just wrote him an email about that. He said that during his vacation, he will be checking emails and returning calls, just not as frequently as he normally would.

I am so sad right now. I did ask him for a note. It says:

Pink,
I am coming back from my trip on Sept. 2nd. I am not leaving forever. I hope that this letter makes my absence easier for you. I will see you on the 3rd of September at 10:30. Get on the bus.
--T

(If you recall, I wrote a post about needing T to "put me on the bus" for my first day of doctoral school, which is next Tuesday).

Ugh. I am crying, half because T is gone for two weeks and it is somewhat of a shock to me, and half because I bought the book "The Noonday Demon" by Andrew Solomon, and I have never read such a close-to-home, unbelievable, honest, passionate, beautiful, painful description of depression. And I am only up to page 27.

I knew he was going away. It is just that it wasn't until our session today that I found out about his return date.

I wrote him a long email tonight, telling him all of my feelings about this. He mentioned something in session about his casual reactions, perhaps being a part of his own "coping mechanism" because he knew how hard it would be. I appreciate his honesty, emotional reciprocation, and sensitivity to my feelings-- but I wish that it had been gone about differently, so that I could have more effectively processed his absence before it happened-- in the past it was always handled differently.

I really miss him already.

Thats so hard. When one of my therapists was gone I wrote her a letter everyday and it really helped. I gave her the huge stack of letters when she came back. She was gone only a week but some letters were 3 pages long. It helped to feel connected to her and pick up were we left off when she came back. My other T went out of town and that was harder, She did come back though and Im glad its over. It will seem like forever but it will pass quickly. hang in there and stay busy.

((( pink )))

I saw my T tonight and she is now gone unitl the 2nd although I don't see her until the 4th. I am telling myself that it is just one session (rather than the whole time between sessions) that is affected. It's just one session. Sounds like something I can deal with.

I'm really glad for you that he'll be returning calls! I love his note and especially the "Get on the bus"!!

Gosh - it almost seems like he put you on the bus to a new grade in T too.. dealing with the vaca in this different manner. Sometimes i wonder about that... how t's will do things for us a certain way, and then suddenly it's different. Like we graduated from the second grade and didn't know we were now in 3rd and supposed to know cursive already!

Likewise, yesterday, the first thing out of T's mouth should have been "Guess what? the trip got moved, and I'll be in town next week." But no... halfway through the session she sort of dropped it in there...."and i'll be here wed too." We had to back up and go over that again to be sure i heard correclty and to see if that meant I'd 'be here" as well.

I'm sorry you're feeling sad about it!! =( But I am glad he'll be checking email and voice mail... he seems to be fairly good at that, right? Hang in there. I liked Echoes ability to think of only missing one time rather than the full two weeks. Sadly, I'm not up to that point yet, and it seems you also have contact with T every day? Or nearly? I hope you'll be ok! Remember we're all out here. (some comfort, eh?)

That's true-- I'll technically be missing only one session-- and with the ability to have contact with him, if needed (I don't want to go overboard contacting him on his vacation), it really shouldn't be that bad. Honestly, I have been so busy today that I didn't even have time to think about his absence... next week I start school so I'll be even busier... hopefully this time will pass quickly. Last week I went all seven days without contacting him by phone or email. There are certain points within the day where it hits me and it just hurts... but like his note said, he will not be gone forever.

(((((((((((((((((( pink )))))))))))))))))))))

It may be only one session, but it can still feel like a lot. It's hard when the rhythm of therapy is interrupted.