[Rosette]

How do you choose a Therapist. Which kind do you choose? I am in a blue funk depressed, and have high level of anxiety. I feel sick to my stomach at times and sometimes loose any signs of hunger. I do caregiving for my mother who is a very negative person. I am in between a rock and a hard place with her, I want to leave and work somewhere else so I dont have these feelings of wanting to end her life, everytime I pass a knife drawer I just have a urge to take one out and stab her I know it wouldnt be worth the time I would spend in jail. She doesnt understand that I am trying to save my life and in doing so I am trying to save her also. I have spent a whole week away from her to get myself back on track to see again on Monday. I am having anxiety about the trek back to her place to hear the same old stuff again and I dont know if I can take it. I cant sleep at night I have a whirring sound in my brain that keeps me awake and the only thing that puts me to sleep is a muscle relaxer. I dont want to do anything crazy so I keep my distance. I am looking for another job but its hard to find work so I have to keep her till I find something else. In the meantime I am going out of my mind. She depends on me solely and I cant deal with that either. She has no friends I mention she needs to go to the senior center our town but she says no. I cannot be her clinging vine. I need a life too. She doesnt understand that she has to go everywhere I go or she isnt happey. I am not happy that she has to be where I am at almost all the time. Its driving me crazy.

[deliquesce]

hi rosette,
i think the best place to start looking for a T would be to go your GP and ask for a referral. your GP hopefully knows you well enough, and would also know about good Ts in the area.
my only suggestion in terms of specific therapists would be to ask for someone who does CBT. that is the most efficacious in treating anxiety, intrusive thoughts and depression.
please keep us posted on how you go.
xo deli

[ECHOES]

You do have a lot on your shoulders. I think you are taking good care of yourself at the moment by not being around her more than you feel you need to.

If you will be using insurance, you could call your insurance company for some names of therapists.

If your community has a community mental health service, that might be someplace you could get help for you and someplace for you mother to get help too. They also have many connections to other agencies that might be able to help find a place for your mother to live independently or with assistance. If you have a community agency on aging or something similar, you might give them a call. These community services would be listed in your phone book or on your community's web site if there is one.

Another ally might be your mother's physician who could advise you and let you know what resources are available to help you with her.

Here is a site that I found helpful. It has information about therapies and therapists. It has a question and answer section that I found helpful too: www.guidetopsychology.com.

After I decided what kind of therapy I wanted, I needed a therapist.
To look for a therapist, I googled psychoanalytic institutes and found the one closest to my city. Then I contacted them and askied if they had a candidate (a person who is a therapist and is learning psychoanalysis) in my area. They did and that's how I found my therapist.

We are good listeners here, so come and talk any time