[mixedup_emotions]

I'm wondering if that's a topic to discuss in therapy....

I am having a lot of trouble right now coping with everything that's going on in my life....especially after my T session on Thursday.

What do you do to cope?

This is definitely something to talk to your T about. I think it's really important to have strategies that you can use at home between T sessions. T and I worked together to figure out some things that help me. I sort of have "levels" of coping...

First level:
Stay busy
Play with the kids
Go outside
Be around friends
Play guitar hero (this got me through the first winter of therapy!)
Color
Knit

Second level
Write down what is going on - save it, or burn it, or rip it up
Do exercises to get grounded
Call a friend to talk about what is going on (my best friend knows most of what I talk about in T)
Use visualization techniques that I've learned

Third level
E-mail or call T to leave a message
Take a klonopin

Fourth level
Call T and leave a message that I need a call back
Schedule an extra appointment

(I never really thought about them in levels like this, but this is pretty much how it works!).

T and I worked together over many many months of therapy to figure out what helps me, and we are still figuring it out. I think I will print out my list and keep it somewhere because it is hard to remember what to DO when I am in a bad place!!

If I had to pick a few, guitar hero, being outside, being with friends, and writing are the ones that have helped me the most. I used to have some very unhealthy coping mechanisms but I almost never have to turn to those anymore. It's a matter of time, and learning, and trial and error...

(((((((((((((((((((((((mixed up))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[pegasus]

Coping strategies are very important and in my opinion they should be the first things that need to be introduced so that you can delve into the real stuff.

[pegasus]

Wanted to add that treehouse's list is very good. I would also add,

1) Learn how to relax, buy a relaxation CD and practice it at least once a day.

2) learn how to breathe properly and how to slow it down for when you are in a panic. Place your hand on your stomach, breathe in 1-2, breathe out 1-2, do this for at least 10 minutes.

3) Meditation and streams of light, another relaxation strat. Gradually learn mindfulness.

4) Self-soothing talk.

5) Write things down.

6) Use distractions when things get too much. Play computer games, cards, crossword puzzles etc. This gives the brain a rest.

7) Ask for help when you need it. Talk to a friend. Or ring T.

Hope these suggestions help.

[mixedup_emotions]

Thanks for the suggestions! I am definitely going to write those down and try to figure out what works for me....

Although I am keeping busy, I find myself still triggered in the process...and then I noticed that I am avoiding participating in events with friends...or doing the things that I normally do for fun.

Like today for instance, I'm busy - lots of housework to do, took the cat to the vet.....But my friend wants to go to a craft fair....and normally I would jump right on that opportunity - but I really don't want to go.

I used to hang out with the neighbors all the time - and they are always interested in having me around - and encouraging me to come over - but I've lost interest, for the most part.

I need to figure things out.

[pachyderm]

No. I have learned coping techniques, to some extent, while in therapy, but not as a direct result, anyway, of the therapy. I have learned some on my own, the hard way, reinforced to some extent by reading similar tales by other people of how to cope. Many of their suggestions seem to be exactly the wrong things for me, but some do make me think I am not totally bonkers in my own thinking.

"Mindfulness" is an example. I developed some of this on my own, partially successfully. But the way I hear it described by others can seem just right (Yes!) or quite wrong. I have to have things described quite specifically and artfully for me to understand.

[mixedup_emotions]

Well, my neighbors contacted me and asked me if I was going with them....yard sailing though....and I said no, that I wasn't really feeling up to it and was busy doing a lot of things, and had to be here for when my daughter got home from her outing....

.....My neighbor responded that she already made sure that my daughter was taken care of, that I needed to get my arse out there or she was coming in to get me.

I went...had a WONDERFUL time....We laughed and joked practically the entire time. It was SO FUN.

And now I'm home, and those feelings all come rushing back....

Well, at least I had a break from it for a while.

[phoenix7]

I'm glad you went out and had fun - good on your neighbours!

as well as the ideas above - I hold ice in my hand

run cold water over my hands

buy some flowers to brighten the place up

count twelve things and say their colour and take a deep breath after each one.

Play with my cats

Water my plants

Eat chocolate !!!! (The non fattening type of course... is there a non fattening type? I only eat it for the seratonin!!!! )

Touch different sufaces to ground myself

take a long shower or bath

Curl up and try to sleep

*********

mixed, i just started another thread with a list of grounding techniques i just came across online. i didn't want to post it here as it's so long and i know sometimes that can be overwhelming for some people.