i met someone now i am being stalked

i met a woman whilst out on my shooting trip last week, she gave me her address and phone number and i was supposed to go to her house last thursday to fix her car, i decided i wouldnt do it and thought nothing more of it, she called around to my house the following day (friday) and it was obvious that it wasnt the car she wanted fixing, what is freaking me out is i never gave her my address or phone number, i made my excuses and asked her to leave, she did, but is constantly bombarding me with phone calls asking me to go around to her house and see her, i cant change my number as i need it for emergencies for the exwife to call regarding my son. i dare not answer my phone when it rings now i wait and do 1471 to see who has called it is freaking me out big time and i dont know what to do. i have tryed to tell her to leave me alone but she will not listen to me, i have even asked my stepmoms brother to have a word with her as he lives close to her but she is relentless calling at all times of the day and night both on the phone and in person, she just wont get the message, thank god she dont have me email address. i dont know what else to do so any advice would be gratefully recieved

Point blank tell her if she doesn't stop you will go to the court house and get a restraining order against her, if that doesn't work get an answering machine
Angie

mellors, this BBC site has some info on what to do, but it is mainly aimed at ppl being stalked on foot rather than by phone. There's also a BBC radio programme on it here. There is more info here too. This site talks about the 1997 Protection from Harrassment Act and the Yahoo directory lists various websites related to stalking.

Hope that's not too much info

Basically though what they say is that you should report her to the police and not encourage her in any way, and that you should not even talk to her.

Um mellors ... in the USA we have a law that once you tell someone to quit calling you, when they continue, you can report them to the phone company and THEY have a department that handles the legal end of it all... Often that's enough to make someone who preys on others to move along.

This is a terrible feeling. You need to make it very clear to this person to leave you alone.

If she doesn't get the message,maybe you could agree to meet her, along with a cop, or at the police station, who could help you make it clear?? maybe?

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Mellors, I have been stalked twice. (It must be my charming personality and good looks. ) I had to call the police. They told me to document each time the man called or came to my home. I had to write down the date, time, what he was wearing and also put down the weather, like temp high, low and "cloudy" or "rainy".

If you have voice mail, be sure to save her messages. You might also want to tell her you have a steady gf or financee. In cases like that, a small lie is permissable.

The next time the man came to the door or called me, I told him I had a steady bf and was documenting his stalking and was going to have him arrested. It stopped.

If you need some more info, pm me or find me in chat.

January

I do think that some people have difficulty discerning the difference between demonstrating keen interest and demonstrating unwanted interest that appears to be stalking to the recipient.

Sometimes I read about women who are the objects of advances that I would consider wacko -- guys putting marriage proposals on billboards, dressing up in a suit of armor to propose -- these anecdotes are real. First rejected, latter accepted. Our societies make such a great deal of persistence in romantic comedies and so forth . . .

I do agree that it's best to put an end to it quickly . . .

It is something you need to put a stop to immediately. All of the above are great sugestions on trying to put her out of your life. I do know however that in the USA, restraining orders are done through the court & you have to be threatened physically before they will really let it go through. That doesn't mean that you can't report them however. I'm sure in the UK, they may have different laws & handle things differently than here. The answering machine is the best solution to the calling...I always screen my calls & won't answer unless I know who it is.

Hope you solve this soon,
Debbie

Call the phone company and put call blocker on your line. It'll cost you a couple of bucks a month, but you can cancel it in a few months when you are sure she's stopped calling and has given up.

Missi

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