[jelyicalCat]

On the last day of July 2009, I thought I would be celebrating sixteen years of marriage. To make a long agonizing story short, I wound up in jail for assault and my husband moved out three days later. What the papers didn't tell you is... six years earlier. hubby and I were involved in a domestic dispute. I was angry, intoxicated, and addicted to name a few and YES so was he. He never has hit me, that night I was punching him while he was pushed into a corner and when he reached out, and put his hand on my chest to prevent me from hitting him again,I fell backward. Hubby then stumbled and fell on top of me. My cervical spine was broken three times, that was treated with a halo (traction device). I also had a brain injury.... because I was intoxicated and uninsured the medical treatment that I recieved was substandard to say the very least. We made it for about fourteen months when he left the first time with my two boys. Three years later, after the "assault" he moved out again. However, this time he didn't take the kids. It has been almost six months now since he moved into a batchlor pad with his two single buddies. I cried for the first two and a half, and by the first of December I decided that I had to move on with my life. I stopped calling him or responding to his calls. Wednesday prior to Christmas Mr. Wonderful came over with quite a changed attitude to accompany his brand new Tatoo. All of the sudden, he wants to talk. It seems like yesterday he was busy denying the fact that I suffered a brain injury due to the fall. His answer for the brain injury is "she screwed up her brain when she was an opiate addict." Also, after I came home in traction.... he was busily out scoring whatever. The substance abuse seemed to continue until he left. Now that he doesn't do anything other than drink too much, he is now saying things like, "wow babe, I never noticed how distractable you are....how can I help?' Whats up? Is Mr. Toads Wild Ride Over? Why is he coming around now? I'm very nervous that this is too good to be true. Any takes on this situation? Seven months prior to his leaving, I quit using any and everything. I have been clean now for fifteen months.

[NuckingFutz]

Wow, cool title. Intense information. If guy lies a lot, asking him questions will just confuse the heck out of you. But you have worked hard on your recovery. Please do not put that in jepordy. You also need to keep your sons safe as well. As far as him coming back into your life with his new tatoo, if you really want to know why, you might have to do some investigating on your own. It seems like that night a few years ago when he fell on you, you took the opportunity to build a new life in spite of your injuries. Keep posting, keep moving forward...looking forward to seeing your posts.

Like another old saw says, "If it sounds too good to be true, it likely is." I would not trust this guy for a nanosecond.

[lynn P.]

I agree the other posters - don't trust him. It's sounds like you're on the right track and you don't need him derailing you. Abusers can be very charming when they want to be -beware.

[VickiesPath]

The both of you have been on a wild ride and during the holidays, people get sentimental so they do stupid things they wouldn't normally do. He's stupid for showing up and thinking that he can re-write history. Don't trust him, don't change your life around, and don't let him cross your boundries. Stand your ground. After the holidays are over, life will return to it's mundane norm and suddenly, everyone will look the same as they did in the past. Stand strong.

[perpetuallysad]

Everyone above gave great advice, I just wanted you to know that you don't have to be with an abuser. You sound like you are doing better yourself. Just try to take care of you and your boys. Maybe, and that's a big if, if he's changed, he will continue to show you he's changed without you having to "give in" to anything and accept him back before you've seen any true proof.

And NF's is right, great title.