 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
#1
Mar 03, 2010, 11:50 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I'm getting so tired of how I'm treated by my husband. It's the same old crap over and over. I wish I could get out of this situation! I feel like he just uses me to take care of the kids, the house, and to do it with him whenever he wants. He treats me like crap. And then with my problems the way they are he's not supportive at all. And he knows how self constious I am right now but he is always talking about other women and saying that when I'm hospitalized he's going to find someone to keep him occupied. And I know he will do it. And everytime we fight he takes everything away from me. Like money, the truck key, etc. And to top it all of the kids see how he treats me and they think it's ok to treat me like crap. I'm disrespected by my husband and kids. And my husband doesn't see anything wrong with what he does. I'm just so tired of it all!
|
|
#2
Mar 04, 2010, 12:48 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Sounds like an unhappy and controlling environment. Would you consider leaving him?
__________________
 How I describe myself: Honest, caring, trustworthy, reliable and generous.
|
|
#3
Mar 04, 2010, 01:23 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Yes it is. I want to leave him but I'm not able to work right now due to my depression and panic disorder. And he uses that to his advantage. He knows I can't do anything right now. And he also doesn't understand how this is affecting me. Let alone even care.
|
|
#4
Mar 04, 2010, 10:23 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Do you have a family member or friend you could stay with for a while? If anything, to let him know that you wont be around forever.
|
|
#5
Mar 04, 2010, 11:07 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I don't have anyone. I've isolated myself from friends and family.
|
|
#6
Mar 04, 2010, 11:33 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
That is pretty much the definition of emotional abuse. The biggest thing for me would be having my children see him treat me that way. I know that you feel like you don't have anyone and that you have cut yourself off from your family but, they're still your family. You don't think that if you called them up and spilled the beans about the whole story that they would want to help you?
|
 TheByzantine
|
|
#7
Mar 04, 2010, 11:39 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
May healing be yours so you may stand on your own two feet one day.
|
|
#8
Mar 04, 2010, 05:30 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
yeah I don't like for them to see it all. So when he gets in one of his moods(I can usually spot a few minutes ahead) I make the kids go in their room so they don't see us fight. I started doing that a few months ago but they know it goes on still. And I'm not sure what they would do. I've thought about talking to my sister but I don't want her to know everything.
Quote:
|
|
#9
Mar 04, 2010, 05:31 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Thank you.......
Quote:
|
|
#10
Mar 05, 2010, 01:20 AM
|
|||
|
|||
|
I really hope you can leave him soon... no one should be used. Best of luck and happiness to you!
|
|
#11
Mar 05, 2010, 09:14 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Thank you......
|
|
#12
Mar 05, 2010, 09:22 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I have been in those shoes....except I worked. I have found that working and working towards something....like leaving put a smile on my face and took away some of the anxiety. he has killed your self esteem and he is the problem that I can see hon. it sure sounds like he has done what he wanted. to make you feel trapped. maybe try to look at it that if you work you can leave. I felt sooooooo much better when I got out of it. much luck to you hon!
__________________
He who angers you controls you! |
|
#13
Mar 05, 2010, 07:01 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Can you find something that you enjoy and have him notice you doing it? Maybe if he see's this he will get the message that you can be happy without him, even if you don't want to be. He also is probably dealing with his own issues. Not an excuse for him, but an explanation that may help deflect some of the ways it may make you feel. I'm sure you've tried talking it out with him, maybe try again and find a way to support each other? Just my thoughts, hope things get better.
|
|
#14
Mar 05, 2010, 10:39 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I agree with Envision and his behavior does sound abusive, BUT, does he want you to leave? That's why he is abusing. Are the attacks because you want to leave?
|
|
#15
Mar 06, 2010, 12:13 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Angie, I am going to share some things with you that I learned on the domestic violence hotlines. He sounds like an emotional batterer. The first thing a batterer will do is isolate you. Sometimes they can make it feel like what they are doing is your fault. This keeps you from getting help. When you wrote about him taking the truck key and your money, he does not want you going anywhere. He will slowly escalate the abusive behavior to test how far he can go. This can escalate all the way to physical abuse. please know there is a safe way out for you and your children. But you need to do somethings to prepare to get out. You need to gather important documents on you and the kids along with any money you can hide away (even if it is a little at a time, it adds up). You might want to keep the papers & the money someplace safe so you can get to it if you have to leave with the kids suddenly. Also call your local domestic violence hotline & keep the number with you. PM me anytime you want.
|
|
#16
Mar 06, 2010, 11:32 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I was working up until November last year. And yea he has killed my self esteem. And he does what ever he wants. And thank you.
Quote:
|
|
#17
Mar 06, 2010, 12:14 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I haven't gotten out of the house in a long time. And if I ever do I get very anxious and have to go back. I have agoraphobia. And he has always been this way as long as we've been together.
Quote:
|
|
#18
Mar 06, 2010, 12:15 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I don't know w hat he's wanting he never talks to me unless its complaining about something.
Quote:
|
|
#19
Mar 06, 2010, 12:20 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I plan on calling them monday to see what I can do. Everything you put on here is so right. The only thing is he has all the money and I have to ask for some to go to the store on. But I'm trying to save a few dollars here and there.
Quote:
|
|
#20
Mar 06, 2010, 03:28 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Angie, the national domestic violence hotline number is 1-800-799-7233. They will talk to you. Give you coping tips and they can hook you up with your local DV place. They even provided a voucher for a cab to get to their facility. The phones operate 24/7 and are really good at calming down petrified callers. I hope this helps sweetie. I will be following this thread closely and you can always pm me.
|
|
#21
Mar 06, 2010, 04:48 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
You mention not getting out of the house much, agoraphobia. I think there are many meds that will help with that. If leaving may be an option, if you could get one one before you go, or even seriously think about leaving, it may help clear your thought process and at least make some things easier despite it still being rough. Not easy but you already knew that.
|
|
#22
Mar 06, 2010, 05:36 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Do you have a safe shelter where you live? Also, look under Attorneys in the yellow pages for the number for the State Bar Association. Call to find out if you are entitled to a low fee or pro bono attorney to help you get through this.
Your husband is basically holding you hostage. |
|
#23
Mar 06, 2010, 05:40 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Agree with Byz.
|
|
#24
Mar 06, 2010, 07:05 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Thank you. I will call them monday. And I will keep ya'll posted.
Quote:
|
|
#25
Mar 06, 2010, 07:08 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I'm gonna ask the dr about some meds for it when I go thank you.
Quote:
|
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
