[rusty covey]

Have your watched leonado in the movie whats eating gilbert grape? Only never talked or made anysounds or laughted about anything.
Have you watched the movie adam about a man living with aspergers syndrome and he startes a relationship only to have it taken away.
Through almost 20 years of marriage my wife had to endure a life of living with me who lacked the ability to feel her needs very much like adam in the movie adam.
She learned of my disability a couple years into our marriage which helped her to know what kind of a person i was and what i couldn't do, only she wasn't aware of the severity.
I recall about 15 years into our marriage i would hear her crying and i would lay there without any feelings telling me to hold her and comfort her. (like adam not knowing what affection was)
ten years, later, i recalled it, and ask her why she cried. She said, i didn't know if you were ever going to change or get better it was getting harder to accept you being this way.
When she pointed out how i lack emotions and feeling to relate to her, the kids, and life i started to work on this and for years all i could do was watch and react by thinking about how i should responde to what just toop place. The problem with this is it's not a true feeling and it comes to late for the other person to feel it.
Though i struggle with things today, we are enjoying life with my new found feelings. I can now get a feeling without thought and express it by showing it with a hug, or saying something nice.
My new feelings let me know i am alive. I am looking forward to the next 30 years with her. She had to go somewhere and only thirty minutes later, i am missing her.
I could look back on my marriage and become depressed looking at the things i couldn't do or get, but, i would raither look into the future and say "look at the things i can do and feel great."

[Belle1979]

Thank you It puts everything into perspective

Originally Posted by rusty covey

Though i struggle with things today, we are enjoying life with my new found feelings. I can now get a feeling without thought and express it by showing it with a hug, or saying something nice.

You're saying that you learned how to empathize with others and became capable of emotional responses by imitating empathy and emotion? That's fascinating! How, exactly, did you achieve this? As I've imitated such emotions and empathy all my life, yet I feel nothing.

Good for you, rusty covey.