[Alex Rayy]

OK, so you might be thinking 12 are you kidding? Well I'm 14 and my girlfriend is 12, and people make fun of me and call me a pedofile, but I don't see anything wrong with it. The age difference is around 2 years and 4 months is their anything wrong with that? We have been together for around 6 months and it is ruining my life. The only good thing about it is that I get to be with her. What should I do? and is it wrong to go out with her the age difference is barely anything to me.

[lynn P.]

Since I'm a mother of an almost 13 and 9 yr olds - I have a problem with 12 yr olds having boyfriends. I hope you're not having a sexual relationship.

[salukigirl]

I agree with lynn. I'm not so sure it's the age difference but simply the age. I had kissed boys when I was 12 or 13 but never had a boyfriend, and I think my dad would have killed me. I didn't have a boyfriend until I was almost 15. Relationships can take away a lot from what should be a fun childhood. Like you're saying, this is ruining your life. You're only 14......there is plenty of time to have a girlfriend later on.

[lynn P.]

I agree with salukigirl. The age difference isn't the problem, but the specific age is. If you were 20 and she was 18, there wouldn't be a problem. You mentioned an excellent point saluki - it's sad to think that a child has a mere 12 yrs to be a carefree kid. You have your whole adult life to have a relationship.

[Omers]

Well, some also depends on the age of concent. Last I knew where I was around your age it was 18. If there is something similar where you live when you are 18 and she is 16 it will set you up for serious legal issues. Once you are both at least over the age of concent then it is a different conversation. Still early but a different conversation.
Also, when you say "dating" what do you mean? When I was younger I had a boyfriend and we said we were dating. However, as an adult know I have a very different understanding of that word.
So... perhaps explaining what dating looks like between you and your GF could take some of the heat off... or not depending on what you mean.

[Omers]

Oh, and parents are another thing all together. I brough home a BF when I was 28 and had graduated from college. My dad was still sure to be caught "just finishing up" cleaning his M16 when we came in the house. My BF just about wet his pants. Not to say all parents are like my dad but their reactions will always be a bit more protective... It's our job if we are doing it right.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

This kinda reminds me of my ex and his new girlfriend. She just turned 13 a few weeks ago and he's my age (15). Apparently all anyone ever does now is tease him.. though due to my own petty feelings I think he deserves it.. Also cause I know what they do as well..

Anyway, in my mind and as a child around your age, I agree with everyone else. It's not so much the age difference as it is the age. 12 and 14 might seem only like 2 years but the levels in maturity vary greatly. The ages are put under more judgment if sexual actions are involved as well (which they shouldn't be!!). Plus as I have witnessed (and experienced) kids our age cannot handle relationships sometimes in a healthy manner.. some don't really get what it means, others put too much of their own self-worth upon the whole situation and many only do it to feel like they belong.

If you really, really like her then what can I say other than you're gonna have to learn how to ignore the ones that tease you. If you don't see it as worth it, then break up either permanently or temporarily until going out with someone 2 years younger is accepted.

[Umbral_Seraph]

This sounds like a case of trying to grow up too fast...
Everyone needs to have their childhood, and if they don't get it as a child they will go through their "childhood" as an adult, which can cause alot of problems...

[sugahorse1]

I can only second what has been said. At that age, there's no real space for "relationships" - one still needs to grow up, get to know yourself.

[Belle1979]

My two cents
I had my first seriously relationship when I was 13 years old. He was 15 at the time, so the two year age difference seems pretty normal to me I guess. The relationship lasted about 4 months and by serious I do mean that it got, some what, physical. I don't think that it emotionally scared me but I do think it set me up for a life of "wanting" to be in a relationship and not feeling normal being single.
I think that you are capable of feeling love and strong feelings at any age.. so legalities aside, go with what feels right for you and for her - don't let bullies talk you down for caring about someone.

[einundzwanzig]

You both are minors, I don't see a problem. The only problem would be if your or her parents had an issue with you dating her, but legally speaking, you should be fine and no your not a pedophile.

21

[Alex Rayy]

Thanks for all the replies, gave me something to think about, but I believe in sex after marriage so we wouldn't do that. Someone also mentioned what I think of "dating". I see it as someone to love and care about, and hug when feeling sad or just as a way of greeting. plus cuddling with while watching movies at my house, talk on the phone every few days. That's basically it, and my I'm almost 15 and she is 12 and 8 months or something so yeah just saying.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

Well what is most important is if you're happy with it. Personally I dislike just about every aspect of being in a relationship, I haven't got a clue why, but I do and I always have.. I'm glad that you can find happiness in this and keep a level head about it too. For some the two things are hard to juggle.